Struggling with the motivation to take care of things

[TealStarfish]

I'm new here.. Now am on medications that should help, but I still struggle with taking care of things around the house, even taking care of myself . It has been going on for a long time and I withdrew from just about everyone I knew. I lost so many friends and some family members treat me as if I'm the black sheep. It has affected my work too. I am trying to work on being better, but it's hard and my lows are low low.

[Hidden]

I totally relate to your situation and I know is very difficult to find the energy to do anything. Try to push through as much as possible and things will start to change and your brain will rewire. It takes time and desire, but it is possible. I was there before and even though I still struggle with a few things, now is starting to get easier to do so. Also find something that makes you happy, like helping people or giving something that needs it. Blessings

[Roxylox]

Hello TealStarfish, I would have all those issues maybe on a lesser scale. I too feel some family members see me as at best an oddity. In a group conversation they don't seem interested in my opinions much. Often feel like a fish out of water.

As regards household chores, I would advise you to feel proud of whatever yo can manage to do in a day, not beat yourself up about what you can't, little steps. I am now trying to adopt that strategy. The fact that you are trying to work on things shows you are doing pretty well.

Remember you need rest, indulge yourself in something you'll enjoy. Maybe promise yourself a pleasant activity or Hobby when you have finished a task. Most of all, you mind you

[Green-heart]

I have the same struggle and am certainly the black sheep. I keep doing the dishes to help this feeling of getting things done, even if it is only a few things it does feel better.

[Hidden]

I'm new here, too. I am proud of you for taking your meds. Sending you some good thoughts.

[Agora1]

TealStarfish, it's funny how so many of us felt like the black sheep of the family.

I know the feeling. Over the years, I too lost friends and family members who got

tired of my never being a part of the family events because of my anxiety.

Good luck with your medication, that should help a lot.

Start with taking care of yourself first. You deserve that xx

[Beautifulrainbow]

Hi there, I know how you, feel also have been there. Like the rest of these, beautiful people are saying you can only do what you can do. Things will become easier for you but just take your time, little steps is better than no steps, because I know how hard that can be if you feel rubbish about yourself. If you feel the mess after a while are not helping then ask for a change. Be proud of your achievements and give yourself a pat on the back. Your, get there darling. Take careKaz 💗🌈

[Dianenonebutme]

Hi TealStTfish,

I joined today because, I couldn’t bring myself to look after myself, everything has been a struggle. I withdrew from friends because I had nothing to say. A few nights ago I woke up and I was afraid of where I was heading with this low mood. I thought I was going completely mad, but I was hurt, angry and I felt abused by people who should know better. Every day I try to go for a walk this is lifting my low mood. My house looks like a dungeon but dirt will be there tomorrow but today is about me. I want to encourage you to make today about you😘

[Roxylox in reply to Dianenonebutme]

Sorry to barge in on your post, but I love the way you say today is about you. Super attitude! I too try to get in a walk every day, but don't always make it. Find I do usually feel better after.

[Hollick]

I know this all to well..struggling with virtually no motivation, very bad..can't get my place organized, ppl say its fine, but its the dust that needs to be removed..I'm sinking, really lost interest in things..so down n depressed, meds aren't helping, doing a cross tapering starting tomorrow, dreading the withdrawal..anyways gonna take a lot of prayers for myself, I hope you too can pick up n carry on..everything is overwhelming atm..take care n best of luck Teal..

[froggymom88]

Hello Tealstrfish! Keep up the struggle because you are worth it. Set some simple goals for yourself each day. Say positive things to yourself each day and remember that you will have good days and bad days. I am rooting for you.

[florapeace]

I can definitely relate! First of all, be proud of yourself for taking the leap and trying medication! That is a feat in itself.

I have found that communication is key. When I feel like I need to cancel plans, avoid interaction, or just straight up isolate I tell friends and family exactly what is going on. You're not burdening anyone by saying, "Hey, I'm actually going to have to stay in tonight," or, "I'm sorry, I can't talk right now because my mental illness is getting the best of me." If they make you feel like you are, that means you were probably right to just spend some time with yourself... you and your struggles don't need that sort of energy when you are in the midst of trying to heal. It's hard to be alone, but over time it will prove to be even harder to be around people that aren't helping you any.

Baby steps, OP. Sometimes on days where I feel I can't even move I make myself a checklist of things that I need to get done/need to do to take care of myself. Even if I only check off one box, even if it's just something like brushing my teeth, I give myself a figurative pat on the back. Positive reinforcement-even when you're giving it to yourself-can really motivate you.

I am going through something very similar, so if you ever need to reach out you are more than welcome! I love talking to people that understand what I' going through because I don't have much of that in my life, either. This HealthUnlocked community has been a blessing for me.

[blacklabs]

Hi, I feel for you I used to be so sociable so many friends but I think around my forties started to be depressed irritable. I think looking back that was when I started with thyroid issues just wasn't picked up. I truly hope that you will in the future start to feel better. I am on meds changed diet and feel so much better but yes I do feel for you. I still have to push myself to do house work never used be like that always busy even hobbies some days are hard to take up . My relationship with my son has been damage but my wonderful daughter educated herself about my condition and every thing fell into place. Sadly until people around you read up on depression then it hurts that they cant understand. But so so many people on this site do and we all get this. Sending love to you.x

[Roxylox in reply to blacklabs]

Just read your post, very interesting. I think my son who I used to get on well with doesn't make an effort to understand. I get treated pretty badly by some ignorant local people who misunderstand me. Instead of feeling sorry for me, he is embarrassed by me even though he has a fair idea that their opinion of me is totally distorted. I know my youngest daughter has stood up for me, she is only17, but is an old soul.

Sorry for ranting on, just know the feeling

[blacklabs in reply to Roxylox]

I think what you stated is embarrassment. I have only had two stressful outbursts with my son one sadly was when his son was born. I was ill seeing things no interest but . I got in touch with doctor he is so angry with my son said it wasn't my fault. Hormones' etc through thyroid had mixed up my mind badly. His partner is awful always about her she is the one who told him it was all rubbish! ,nothing wrong with me . Banned my husband and me from the house. All I did was inform him he should have kept in touch in lock down that was mostly it. But also couldn't bond with baby and told him I was ill and I truly was. Horridly he has kept away from his sister because she knew I was ill. Depression is sad I love life its sounds silly but I truly do and can be the most upbeat and alive but when I am down its just not there. The shock of not bonding with my grandchild shocked me so much I just flipped even tried to hurt myself. What I understand is it must of hurt my son. The doctor said to me it must have hurt you meaning me so much and yes it did. His father went around to explain and the selfish nasty b locked him out and drew the curtains this is what we are dealing with and that alone doesn't help when your feeling down what so ever.

[Roxylox in reply to blacklabs]

God that puts my miniscule complaint itto perspective. Unfortunately their choice of partner is theirs alone, I hope things improve for you

[blacklabs in reply to Roxylox]

Yes what makes this worse is our daughter is in for intensive care next week main operation on her heart. She contacted her brother to tell she in isolation after her op and birthday her dad birthday and all our son could say is thats not a good birthday. not I will come and see you we gave the baby so many toys at christmas four months all not even a card or took him to even see our daughter, Shocking Sons partner kept her nephew from her. Sons said partner dressed him in an outfit our daughter had bought him. Our sons partner then loaded it onto Instagram so daughter could see him. She was so pleased to him she ticked like . Once sons partner saw this she eroded all the pictures and memories from her and us. She is wicked a narc in the true form nasty and cruel. All this onto off them knowing I am ill and his sister and his dad diabetic ill. All because I said somethings and couldn't bond. due to some sort of brain dementia at the time.

[Roxylox in reply to blacklabs]

It all seems so petty. I have seen my cousin cut off from her brother and other for years for silly reasons. They won't answer her calls. Think the mother is a Narc

[blacklabs in reply to Roxylox]

Yes her family cut her off so she did the same to us . They think its being grown up but I feel so sorry for our grandson he has no family except that she she worships her best mate. And I will tell you when her best mate isn't there for her she told us horrid things about her and thats her best friend who she uses. Went off with her for coffee cake when the baby was 12 days old! Guess what that is why I flipped so angry no loving to the baby same as I saw with my son false self fake.

[Hidden]

Do you have a therapist? That would help you start to feel better.

[Ruthy24]

I understand how you feel. Everything seems hard. I look around and feel guilty because I have not cleaned my house. I have to force myself to do things but once I do I feel better. I want to find a way to help other people. I haven't volunteered in years but I know that will help. I have terrible back pain and need some kind of procedure before I can do much though. I hope you will "take heart" and know how valuable you are even though you have lost the support of friends and family members. That is really hard. What I hate most about depression is that you don't like yourself and no one else likes you. It just seems that way.

[Ruthy24]

My name is Mary.