Lost

[Gina_64]

I feel so lost in life. I have major depressive disorder, anxiety and bipolar disorder. I'm taking medication and seeing a psychiatrist. I'm searching for a therapist to try. I feel hopeless and desperate. I have a supportive husband but nobody understands what it's like to be me. People just give me ideas like, "force yourself to get dressed, put makeup on or go out." Well I can't! I can't get off of the couch! I'm hopeless!

[Michdau1]

Just start with this one thought. You may FEEL hopeless but YOU ARE NOT hopeless. You have value and I'm glad you have a supportive spouse. He is choosing you over and over again each day ❤️ what a lovely compliment XXX

[Gina_64 in reply to Michdau1]

Thank you!

[Dreamie]

Hi Gina_64. Just want you to know that you are not alone in your feelings and suffering. Also when people give me that ole “just get up and make yourself do something positive” it can be so frustrating! I feel so alone like no one in my world really understands. Maybe they don’t but there are people who do understand. I’ve found them here. I’ve found them in books that I’ve read. I’ve found them in group therapy. I will say that finding a therapist that’s a good fit for you can make a big difference. So please keep looking and give someone a try soon. Hoping you feel uplifted soon. 💗

[Gina_64 in reply to Dreamie]

Thank you! I'm trying and I have an appointment with a therapist on July 2nd.

[Everyones_Anchor]

Nice to Meet you im new as well .. I have found myself getting Anxious and very emotional lately . I dont understand why... But im hoping to make some friends here so we can chat . I think it might make me feel better

[Gina_64 in reply to Everyones_Anchor]

I think it will. Plus to get to know people who are like you and go through similar things. Although I know why I'm like I am, sometimes you just need a friend to talk to.

[TyJus]

Hi Gina,

I am 54 and know exactly what your feeling when people tell you to just brush it off and get up and do something about it. It's easy for others to say that have no ideal how it feels

to be clinically depressed. Like me I am sure you do not like feelings of depression & anxiety and pray everyday that tomorrow you will wake up and it will all be gone. I wish this everyday and continue to lay on the couch all day doing nothing. I am new here and hope to find some kind of pleasure chatting with others dealing with the same feelings I am. Although it is very hard I try to keep my head up by thinking there are a lot of others out there with the same or worse problems than myself. Tomorrow is a New Day!

[Gina_64 in reply to TyJus]

I do wake up every day and hope it will be better, at least some relief. I open my eyes and there it comes. My only relief is when I sleep. It's a sad life when you wait all day for bedtime. I never look forward to tomorrow anymore cuz it's just more of the same. Wake up, realize that it's morning, get the feelings again, go on the couch for the day.

[Agora1]

Hi Gina

You certainly aren't Hopeless...maybe a little lost and even stuck but not for long.

You are taking the right steps in going forward on medication, seeing a psychiatrist

and most importantly will be adding therapy to your regimen. Therapy will become

all important in getting you on the right path again. Giving you some direction. You

are blessed in having an understanding and supportive husband. That's all you need

besides us lol

When the do gooders give you suggestions, just smile politely. In one ear and out

the other. Believe in yourself when the time is right, everything will fall into place.

I'm glad you're here. xx

[Gina_64 in reply to Agora1]

♥️

[kvolm2016]

Glad you are reaching out here to express your feelings and get the support that we can offer. As you said, no one can truly understand what you are experiencing in your daily life but as you see from others posts, we find many here who do have similar experiences and can relate to a greater degree.

I would add my agreement with what others have said that feeling lost, hopeless and desperate make it seem like those feelings are accurate but we learn to recognize that they are not. How we feel does not determine who we are and if you need to say that to yourself a million times a day and write it everywhere your eyes will see it in your home, then do this!

I'm glad to hear that you are trying to get started with a therapist. I personally feel like that is such a great support! Have you worked with a therapist before?

[Gina_64 in reply to kvolm2016]

Yes I have many times, but they are more fascinated with my story than helping me. I'm hoping this time will be different

[kvolm2016 in reply to Gina_64]

I'm sorry those have been disappointing to you. Could you make that statement to a new therapist so they know that you are hoping for a different approach and outcome this time?

[Gina_64 in reply to kvolm2016]

Yes, I plan on telling her of my past experiences. She knows nothing about me or why I am coming. Most have had contact with me prior to my appointment or paperwork to fill out. She didn’t , so I’m a little worried.

[kvolm2016 in reply to Gina_64]

I like the idea that the therapist gets to hear from you first before reading anything on paperwork and forming some initial thoughts from that. If you feel like sharing this answer, what are you hoping to accomplish from working with this new therapist at this time?

[Gina_64 in reply to kvolm2016]

I am hoping to learn some techniques to deal with my anxiety, depression, and mood swings. I’ve tried meditation and CBT once. I just wasn’t ready for the commitment at that time. I have no motivation, and I think that’s very hard to treat. I cannot just force myself. That will be a waste of my and her time. I want to learn where this stems from, without dredging up my childhood. Which I’ve done therapy forever for. I want to talk about the here and now. What happened a year ago to make me fall into the worst times I have ever had with my mental health? I hope she can help me.

[kvolm2016 in reply to Gina_64]

I think being able to give the therapist these specific "goals" that you have will go a long way toward him/her being able to offer some helpful techniques. Maybe these goals will be your motivation to invest/commit in a more significant way this time. Getting to a real understanding of what happened a year ago that was different than before, seems like it would truly help you to deal with the here and now.

Do you feel like you mood swings are not sufficiently controlled by your medication(s)?

[Gina_64 in reply to kvolm2016]

No I do not feel like my mood swings are under control at all. I feel awful, so today, I am going to go to the ER and try to get admitted for some help. We have no other resources here to go to for evaluation. My psychiatrist isn't answering my phone calls. Idk what else to do.

[Dreamie in reply to Gina_64]

Dear Gina. I’m so sorry for how awful you are feeling. Have you been to ER before? I went once last year and spent the whole day there and got no help. Unless I was having delusions or admitted I was going to hurt myself or someone else there was nothing they could do. I don’t know how bad off you are but I would keep calling your psychiatrist. I hope you get some relief quick! So sorry. Hang in there.

[Gina_64 in reply to Dreamie]

I'm.being admitted to inpatient now.

[kvolm2016 in reply to Gina_64]

I am glad you are taking this seriously and I applaud you for taking the initiative and taking control of your health. I hope you are finding some support and relief there. Please keep talking to us as best you can while you are there!

[Hidden]

Hi Gina.. You are not alone, especially not here..we understand what its like and can offer you as much advice you need to help yourself..it really isn't how you make things sound..everything has it purpose..if only we start to see the positives rather find comfort in the negatives..one positive is you are here, this site...it will only get better, but you need to do the work..change is good..you will be an asset to us and we to you..welcome..

[Gina_64 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you. I am hoping that my story will help others as I fight through it. I’m feeling ok today so far. My husband brought me out for a little while yesterday, and I was able to get myself dressed and put makeup on. A very big step for me!

[Hidden in reply to Gina_64]

Yep!..just one step at a time, crawl if you have to...also, we are all in this together..

[Gina_64 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you for being there. I'm appreciative to have people who understand and give me positive feedback. I am on one other forum and I couldn't be more thankful for the people I have met.

[Hidden in reply to Gina_64]

Likewise..so that's a positive out of the temporary feeling of feeling lost...if only we can shift our focus towards seeing the positive side of things..and maintain a balance in processing our thoughts and thinking..

[Gina_64]

Today is a bitter sweet day. My son graduated from college, so he drove 4 hours from college to come see me to say goodbye for now, he is moving to Houston,Tx for his new job. I live in Charleston, SC. I am beyond proud of him, he graduated with a chemical engineering degree. We are very close and it’s hard to let go, but he now has to spread his wings and fly. I am hoping to get to go see him but I am still struggling to get out of the house. I have a daughter who also lives in TX, they will only live 2 hrs from each other. So whenever I feel I can make it, I would love to go see them. My anxiety is making it so difficult to think about right now. And it will b difficult to get through my sadness today, I don’t want him to see me cry, but idk if I can help it. I AM very happy for him. I just want to b strong.

[Gina_64]

I'm bring admitted inpatient today