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New life how to adapt?

Graciemaks profile image
6 Replies

Life can be so funny... This year my mum was diagnosed with kidney failure.. so it has been a new journey dawn.. it has now been 7months on dialysis... Am worried how long can she live... I don't like always like facing the reality that one day she will be gone... How has been your experiences with sick loved ones? How did you cope and embrace a new journey??

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Graciemaks
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STEM_Dad profile image
STEM_Dad

I have an aunt who was on dialysis for over a decade until she finally received a kidney transplant. She's adopted, so finding a donor who was a match took a long time. She had to live in hospice care for all that time. I know that it's scary, and not everyone is able to receive a transplant. (I lost touch with my aunt, so I don't know how she's doing now. It has been over 15 years since her transplant, and I hope that she's still enjoying her life.)

I was married for 20 years, and my wife (now ex-wife) has developed a number of health issues, including diabetes and chronic pain. I did my best to help her while we were still married, but can't do much for her now. (I still love her, but she was asked for the divorce because she fell in love with someone else.) I know that she doesn't care for herself as well as she could, and it makes me concerned for her, and worried that her health might decline further. We are co-parenting our youngest two kids (ages 11 and almost-9), and some days I'm worried that she might not be here for them the rest of their youth.

Other family members have had some serious health issues, and my grandmother died of cancer very shortly after she was diagnosed with it. (It has been over 20 years since her passing, and she is still greatly missed. I think that she died so swiftly that we didn't have time to really process what was happening.)

By contrast, my grandfather has been suffering from congestive heart failure for about 20 years and has beat cancer at least 3 times. He turned 100 years old this year. (He has been developing age-related memory problems, and the last time I was able to visit him was 9 years ago, and he seemed so weak. I've been prepared for several years not for the inevitability of his passing.)

It's never easy. Life is so fragile, yet also very resilient. Life continues through each of us, as we grow and learn and have many experiences along the way.

Graciemaks profile image
Graciemaks in reply to STEM_Dad

This is quite something... Thankyou for the support.. God bless you

Burhanerdem profile image
Burhanerdem

I am sorry to hear that I hope she will be better soon. I think the best way to support her is being together, and you should do your own responsibility because if you struck with the same emotional situation you might start losing your mental health. I suggest you do mindfulness, guided meditation, and breathing techniques. It will slow down your body-mind connection that you enjoy your life.

Graciemaks profile image
Graciemaks in reply to Burhanerdem

Thanks for this. .God bless you

Burhanerdem profile image
Burhanerdem

Be with it. It must be challenging to stay with that, but as long as we wake up daily, good gives us new opportunities to pray.

Overall, you can read some of the books or watch some psychology-related videos and try to teach yourself you can do your best.

Graciemaks profile image
Graciemaks in reply to Burhanerdem

Woow... Positivity all the way

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