no hope for joy again

[cmilash]

i’m struggling with lack of motivation and no enjoyment of anything in my life. i’m not sure why i’m so low right now but my adhd meds dyanaval and adderall aren’t even helping. i’m afraid i’ll never feel joy again. life seems dull and i’m finding it hard to find any motivation to take care of myself. any direction or encouragement is greatly appreciated.

[STEM_Dad]

Welcome to the forum. You're in a good place here.

Is this a recent change? Has anything changed with your health, relationships, or quality of life that preceded this?

Have you already made your doctor aware of what you're going through, particularly the part about "no enjoyment of anything". It might be a sign of depression, or any of a number of conditions.

I've been taking an antidepressant since February, and it's really been helping me. (I went through counseling, too.) But for me, it was a depression that was definitely caused by difficult life circumstances, but I also know that depression runs in my mom's family, too. - My doctor also ordered blood tests, to make sure there wasn't a biological cause, like thyroid issues, but I was in the clear.

-----

There are some basic things that you can do to care for yourself, which should help with general health and wellness.

* Try to get adequate amounts of sleep

* Drink plenty of fluids

* Try to make good eating decisions

* Exercise (even if it's too go on a 20 minute walk a couple of times per week)

* If you can do so, spend some time in nature at least once or twice a month

* Spend time talking to a friend or loved one (in person would be best, then video call next best, then phone call, text messaging would be the least effective but better than nothing)

* Journal about what you're feeling and experiencing, to help process it... perhaps doing so will help your realize unexpressed emotions

[cmilash in reply to STEM_Dad]

i have had some medication changes. i went off lithium to try some other mood stabilizers. i also changed the dosing of adhd meds. i alerted my doctors office but she is out of town for the weekend. i’m meeting with her tomorrow.

[STEM_Dad in reply to cmilash]

It's very good that you're meeting with your doctor so soon!

Yes, starting or stopping a medication, especially a neurological medicine, can certainly cause a change in mood.

The very first time I was on an SSRI (for anxiety that time), I didn't wean off of it properly...I practically quit "cold turkey." Within 2-3 weeks, I felt a general malaise, which affected my mood and my thinking, and it lasted at least 3 weeks. (I'm on the same medication for depression now, and will definitely abide by my doctor's orders to wean gradually when it's time.)

[Hominid711 in reply to STEM_Dad]

Doctor's orders haha I wish 🤭

[Gettingittogether]

Definitely share this with a doctor or provider. And go from there.

Sounds to me like you may be depressed right now, which can happen when we have a lot going on or untreated conditions. You don't say whether you have ADHD or suspect it. But know that depression is common among people with ADHD.

So here's a tip for depression. Depression tries to convince us (and it is powerfully convincing) that taking no action is the only thing we can do. Depression tells us we can do nothing because anything we do will fail.

So you have to ignore that and/or test it. You make the first step, a call to a profession, report what's going on and go from there. If you have access to a mental health profession, you can also go that route. Just keep in mind again the way depression tries to interfere with solutions.

Let's say I had a bad experience in the past with a therapist. Depression uses that information to say all future experiences will be bad. Well, I'm glad I don't have that attitude towards cars. I've driven some awful cars and the car I have right now is incredibly reliable and just requires minor consistent maintenance.

Can you say more about what's going on with you? Are you working? Are you single? Are you spending days in bed? Have you been to mental health profession before?

You're in a tough place. Hang in there. Good job to come here.

[cmilash in reply to Gettingittogether]

i have adhd. i’ve recently been changing my meds. i changed from concerta to vyvanse. then vyvanse to dyanaval. most recently adding a short acting adderrall because the dyanaval was only lasting 6 hours. i was also on lithium for years and we had stopped that a couple of months ago to try new mood stabilizers. i recently stopped taking the mood stabilizers along with the wellbutrin i was taking because my doctor and i thought that trying only medication for adhd might work and make me more energized.

i’m sorry this is really incoherent. i’m still in crisis mode at the moment. currently i only feel well when my adhd meds were working. thursday they stopped working. i felt no effect and the hopelessness and no motivation set in.

i have a full time job. i have friends. im dating someone. i have a dog. im enrolled in classes for the summer.

[JMPhD in reply to cmilash]

Hi, I’m sorry for what you are going through, fearing no joy again is frightened and I’d experienced this before…the feeling and the fear. It may help to know that it appears to be caused by the change in neurochemistry from the meds. Changing so much at once, makes it hard to know what…stopping wellbutrin, changing to new ADHD med, and get off the mood stabilizer all at once makes it hard to know which. Hopefully, your dr will work closely with you to see what works & restore your joy. Wellbutrin did that for me and also helps with ADHD. Maybe the dr. can reintroduce one of the meds to see if that helps. I’ve been where you are, and you can come back from this emotional place!

I’m right now having a struggle because faced with advanced cancer.

Please don’t hesitate to ask questions and advocate for yourself with your dr., until you get it right!

Best JM

[Hominid711 in reply to Gettingittogether]

What's the car?

[Gettingittogether in reply to Hominid711]

Toyota Corolla.

[Hominid711 in reply to Gettingittogether]

Yep that's a reliable car.

[Gettingittogether in reply to Hominid711]

Sounds like a lot is going well for you. My perspective these days is to call my provider if I have any bad effect from a med or change of meds. Just doing that creates some hope. And the provider can sometimes reassure me and/or make a med change.

[Rocko_35]

I was diagnose last week with ADHD and provider is highly certain that I have a learning disability. Like you, I haven’t derived much joy in anything. I’m scheduled to have a medication conversation this week.

I’ve been feeling conflicted. On the one hand the diagnosis explains so much… but I also despair thinking about how hard it was to finally succeed.

I’m still working on my feelings. But maybe you can try exploring activities that are similar to the activities you once enjoyed. Boxing and Muay Thai used to give me joy. Though it’s not pleasurable, I still do it anyways— because exercise is supposed to be good for the adhd. I bought a kendo sword and am trying to learn that. I’m also trying to learn sambo, which is the grappling style from the John Wick movies.

Maybe choosing newly similar will get your blood moving?

[STEM_Dad in reply to Rocko_35]

I think that many people, perhaps most of us, go through a grieving process after getting our ADHD diagnosis. You might experience thoughts like:

* "So that's what's 'wrong' with me."

* "Why didn't anyone notice sooner?"

* "My life could have been so much better/different if I'd been diagnosed earlier."

For me, the diagnosis caused me to feel elated, because suddenly my whole life made sense. I embraced my ADHD diagnosis, and I think that helped me go through the grieving process in less time, but I still did grieve.

I also think it helped me that my doctor and I found a good medication for me. (Initially, I was on an SSRI for anxiety and Adderall XR, but after about 6 months I started on my current meds, atomoxetine, aka Strattera.)

I knew from reading and hearing about other people's experience that it could take months or even a few years to find the best medication. So, I think that helped me set my mindset to a wait-and-see approach, and I'm sure that helped me keep a positive attitude during that time.

[Rocko_35 in reply to STEM_Dad]

yeah I’m concerned about the medication “journey.” I’m getting anxious about the trial and error process and how it’s going to affect my mood. I was a smoker for 22 years. My healthcare providers seem to think that the nicotine suppressed my symptoms. It was only until I quit smoking that my symptoms revealed itself.

I was hoping they could just prescribe nictotine patches. At the very least, I know what I’m getting into.

[STEM_Dad in reply to Rocko_35]

Nicotine is a stimulant, which studies show triggers dopamine release. Stimulant medications like Adderall, Vyvanse, Ritalin, and others, also trigger dopamine release. So, perhaps a stimulant medication would help you.

Wellbutrin (bupropion) is classed as an antidepressant, but it's been used to help treat ADHD. I remember that it's also used to help people quit smoking. If I remember right, bupropion triggers release of both dopamine and serotonin.

-----

Also, I've recently learned that there is now genetic testing to help with the medication selection process. I don't understand the science of it, but supposedly genetic markers can indicate how a person will metabolize certain medications.additudemag.com/genetic-tes...

Some people have said that their healthcare plan covered the genetic testing. (Not ever health plan does.)

But as I said, I'm grateful for my medication, and I'm glad that it only took 6 months to find one that works so well.

* Mine doesn't stimulate dopamine release. Instead, it is a selective norepinephrine reuptake inhibitor (SNRI), which means it enables my brain to wait longer to reabsorb released norepinephrine. It's a different neurotransmitter, but like dopamine, it's also needed to help the prefrontal cortex to work effectively.

[Rocko_35 in reply to STEM_Dad]

that’s helpful. I will bear these in mind when I speak to the psychiatrist.

Thank you!

[2Tuxboy4]

Go to your primary care physician and explain it to them. I was in your shoes before and I didn’t reach out for help. I had a nervous breakdown and that is putting it mildly. I just couldn’t understand how I was feeling. It’s depression, you need to get help immediately. Please do so immediately !

[NorKoln in reply to 2Tuxboy4]

Not wrong.. my first few months of this year were very likely the edges of a nervous break down. I should have sought help much earlier!!

[Hominid711]

Sounds like you have a psychiatrist (?)

[cmilash in reply to Hominid711]

i have a psychiatric nurse practitioner

[Hominid711]

Apparently this incorporates recent research: additudemag.com/webinar/com...

[NorKoln]

I struggled with this the past year, and it got REALLY bad the first couple months of 2023. So bad, I got a new doctor and re-evaluated my depression meds.

I rationalized 1,000 reasons as to why... but after changing meds, I felt like my old self and was able to start working my way back outside of the pit I had fallen into.

I was traveling this weekend, and forgot my new meds and within days... I could feel the pit clawing me back down. With such a short time, I was able to stay out of the abyss. I'm back home now.

I don't judge myself. Depression runs in my family. I broke my brain with a long term trauma and I don't react to stress well. It's a crutch I will always need. Similar to the cane I carry after a broken hip... just a tool I need.

[STEM_Dad in reply to NorKoln]

That seems like a very good mindset to have about the medications that help is so much...that they are tools for our benefit. (It sounds much better than referring the need to take medicine as a "dependency", a term which has so heavily used for addiction that we don't think of it in context.)

Using tools brings up imagery of adaptation, intelligence, and productivity in my mind.

[New-Diagnosis]

Hi, cmilash. Sorry you are feeling so bad. There is hope! People do bounce back, even if it can be slow going. Our 22-year-old daughter has been very depressed, struggling with anxiety disorder, and then completely lacking energy and motivation for almost 3 years (no steps towards working or school or socializing beyond social media) -- brought on by struggles at college, then the pandemic, and then dropping out. She was on Wellbutrin and Buspar, but no other treatment for her diagnosed ADHD (was reluctant to try anything). About a month ago, she finally agreed to add methylphenidate (Ritalin category) and it has been a quick and dramatic turnaround for her. Things feel easier; she has fewer low moods; social anxiety is vastly improved; she has energy and drive to make changes; and she sees a future. There is still a lot to do to get back on track, but she's well on her way.

Please know that you, too, can have a transformation and find joy again. Her PNP said that Ritalin is an especially good choice for those with serious lack of motivation and energy + it helps with social/other anxiety. Wishing you the best! Please update us so we know how things are going for you.