HELP WITH LAUNDRY/ CLOTHES EVERYWHERE (ADHD)

[MommaBear0210]

I have an issue with clothes. There's four of us that live here, my almost 2 year old son, my boyfriends 9 year old daugher, my boyfriend, and I. I am in charge of taking care of laundry and I fail at it. There are clothes everywhere. Our room looks like a garbage mound of clothes. Then when I finally wash and dry them they sit around. I dread doing laundry and yet hate the clothes everywhere. PLEASE HELP!!! PS - I was diagnosed ADHD a few weeks ago and believe this may be why I have such a hard time?

[Shnookie]

Hi this Shnookie. Welcome to this supportive community. What U write about is classic ADHD behavior. I have the same issues at time with my laundry. But I live by myself so the problem isn’t compounded by living with 4 people. Is it possible 4 U to explain to your boyfriend how U R feeling and have him help U with the laundry ?

Has your therapist prescribed U any meds ?

Also it might be helpful if U can break things down. In other words U have collected enough of the kids laundry for 1 load of wash. Throw these in the washing machine

and dryer then finish the load. Write yourself a little note. I can do this. I don’t want all the clutter around me. See if that works.

I’m here 4 U hugs 🤗 Shnookie

[Clayfox]

Success looks different for different people. In our house of four, each main area has a place to throw clothes. Upstairs there is a large basket, downstairs we put them on the stairs. Clothes aren't everywhere, but they're not perfectly organized either. Socks are everywhere, but we just gather them when it's laundry time.

As for clean laundry, each of us has a basket. Ain't nobody folding laundry and putting it in dressers in this house!

For us, it mostly works, and that's good enough. Laundry often stays in the basket it came out of the dryer in, but we usually have enough clean underwear. It took a long time for us to just accept what we naturally do and work with that instead of against it (next up I'm pushing for a coat rack instead of trying to get the kids to use closet hangers, you can see the pattern here).

I also hate laundry, but I love throwing things. Laundry is my partner's job, but I help out by throwing dirty clothes at the stairs or basket. I don't have to do a lick of laundry, but I can still help in a way that works for me.

[GradStudent-ADHD in reply to Clayfox]

Really love these comments! "Success looks different for different people" and "good enough" is okay! Sometimes we don't hear this enough OP I hope you find a system that works for your team, even if it's a little unique!

[Drea-]

My partner and I both suffer from depression, anxiety, and ADHD so this has been difficult for us to manage as well, especially when there is very little motivation. We found a few tips to help us:1) Do many small loads of laundry. Do not start another load in the wash until the load in the dryer is folded and put away. This will prevent you from gaining a mound of clean wrinkled clothes from piling up.

2) Try to get more support involved and for us, it looked like the two of us actively doing laundry instead of me being solely in charge.

3) Have multiple dirty laundry bins and at least one clean bin to make transporting laundry more organized and easy to move. Place the bins in areas of your house where you are naturally/normally leaving your clothes.

4) Pair the task with something fun or productive. You could watch tv or a movie, and listen to music, a lecture, or an audiobook. Or you could do some form of self care while you do laundry. I try to pair a task with something I like or enjoy and it helps tremendously. I call it "active tv" now

5) Following a routine can be extremely helpful if you think of it like a weekly or daily appointment where your time is scheduled off to perform the task.

Hope some of these are helpful!

[Zompopo]

I absolutely love “success looks different for different people”. That is my new mantra 😁 early in my marriage I started doing laundry for both of us. But after he complained a couple times about me not getting things put away I said “OK, do your own laundry then!” That was a good decision. I still struggled with my laundry and my daughter’s when she came along. Surprisingly, what really changed my feeling about laundry was Marie Kondo’s book The Life Changing Magic of tidying up (that’s the only thing that stuck with me from that book). Now I find laundry relaxing and meditative and my closets and drawers are the one place in my house that feels organized and peaceful. Like Drea, I also often do it while watching a show in the evening or listening to an audiobook.