How do you calm yourself down?

[Jaly]

Have you ever been in a situation where a loved one is really struggling and there is nothing you can do to help? How do you guys calm yourself down when your emotions are running the show?

[Jengirlmama]

I close my eyes and take deep breaths ( I have two emotional daughters). For me, I imagine myself with the Lord and ask for help. Sometimes I walk away to do this. Sometimes stepping back even in the middle is the best thing. It is only a few seconds. Maybe get others to leave the area for their safety or to remove the triggers or stimulation. I need more info for more. (Also I was a SPED teacher. ) But that is a good start. Sometimes just stand there quietly and don’t say anything and breathe. Fold your hands. Hum a song in your head.

[Jengirlmama]

Keep telling yourself that you are helping them while you are doing this. They know you are there for them, your calmness makes them feel safe. Also makes them not feel judged. If they are a child: If that person ends up going a direction of unsafety for them, I merely move my body in between and speak calmly “I don’t want you hurt. “ If they are a child, the more you are there for them and they feel safe, the more they may feel comfortable in their environment and validated for their feelings. They will do better. When they are calm you can help them verbalize what they felt. Hopefully they will eventually learn to talk about it more so it doesn’t build up. If that’s what you mean. If they are an adult I hope you can talk to them about getting help when they are feeling better. My own daughter has learned to tell us leave me alone. Which means she needs time to herself so she can be well and feel better. That is the best thing for her and we have learned to respect that. She has come a long way from kicking and screaming.