Lost and not found

[Dison]

In the past 36 hours I have had my cell phone and my wrist watch stolen. I had become distracted and left the watch and the phone in vulnerable places. knew where my phone was. I tracked it on my computer, and the individual who stole it had got rid of it by dropping it into a trash container across town. I went after it. I knew it was there. So, as it turns out, I was rather ruthlessly sticking my hand and arm into the trashcan trying to find the phone. I was making a scene. Unable to find my phone in two trash cans I went inside the store and while washing my hands I placed my watch next to the sink. I walked out of the bathroom leaving the watch on the sink. I returned less than 10 minutes after I walked out of the bathroom, and the watch was gone. I was angry and ashamed. I was willing to tell people about the phone being stolen. I was too embarrassed to tell people I also had my watch stolen too. The watch and the cell phone were “victims” of my ADD.

[Hidden]

Have you heard of Tiles you attach them to important things and keeps track off them it tells you all kinds of info. If things are getting stolen sounds like yoyr around shady people etc. Check out "Tiles" they are a livesaver

[Dison in reply to Hidden]

I will look into it. Thanks so much. Yes, I volunteer my time helping people who are in need and with the homeless. I find myself in "shady" places. Ha. I hang around people and places where an individual, like myself, should be more careful knowing I can get distracted very easily.

Thank you for your reply. I just needed to get it off my chest. I have learned that I am not practicing self care when I get angry with myself. I am a responsible individual. I have ADHD and the more I can accept that; I can more easily reconcile my behaviors that yield disappointing results.

[Hidden in reply to Dison]

Don't carry anything you do not need don't wear a nice watch. People try and Prey on people with ADHD they don't understand it and think we are stupid when we are far from stupid. If you have any questions feel to ask. Get the tiles and put lanyards with a tile on your keys anything important to will save your from exploding looking for things or losing them.

[Dison in reply to Hidden]

I am not familiar with tiles or lanyards. Could you help me?

[Hidden in reply to Dison]

Yes a lanyard it typically used to put badges etc on for people to check in and out they are all over Amazon get one with a brighter color. Google "Tiles" during Christmas they put the prior years on sale and I got four for 40.00. The rugged ones aren't the best unless your being deployed but make sure you get the ones where you can change the batteries my original ones once they got dead they are dead. Anything else I can help you with let me know. Once you learn to manage it you will get better.

[CeeJ49]

Ugh. I’m so sorry. I left for the vacay today and realized I didn’t know where my wallet was yesterday. Fast forward to 20 min before I was supposed to leave after remembering and forgetting dozens of times and I’m tearing apart the house sobbing. I feel you.

[Dison in reply to CeeJ49]

Another issue I’m facing Is the ability to relax more. I always want to be up and on the go. I find it hard to be in the apartment all morning and not go out somewhere. If it is late In the afternoon I feel I need to at least go out in the evening. I make everything a priority. I am loosing some traction in my practices of mindfulness and meditation.

[78rpm]

Also, keep in mind that non-ADHD people also misplace and lose things. No human being can give focused attention to every single detail in their lives. Even those who have world-record level working memories would quickly become overwhelmed and exhausted given all of the individual steps, tasks and actions a person does in a day.

And whenever ANYBODY gets distracted from something, it necessarily means that their attention isn't on something else.

So the difference between people like us and them is just a matter of degree.

And the fact you left the watch unattended makes sense given your mind was upset and preoccupied with the loss of the cell phone. Neurotypical brains also don't work as well when they are upset about something.

My point in mentioning this is just to say that the way ALL people get through day is mostly through habits and rote. We learn new knowledge and skills and automate them so that we can retrieve information and perform tasks instantaneously without having to consciously think everything through step-by-step.

Are there ways that you can change your habits and routine in such a way as to minimize the odds of losing something valuable knowing that you can't and won't have constant focus of its whereabouts?

For example, you mentioned that you set the watch down on the sink. Could you establish for yourself a habit that you will set your watch down ONLY in certain spots inside your house - and, if you are anyplace else, place it instead in your pocket?

Unless I am at home, I keep my phone attached to a holster on my belt at all times. If I needed to charge it while I was at work, I had a charger on my desk in a specific place that I felt was safe. So when I was at work, if my phone was not in my hand, it was either on my holster or in the charger.

Just doing those sorts of things minimizes the potential of losing something as a result of being inattentive.

It doesn't eliminate the risk completely. The other day I was in a public place with my laptop and using my cell phone as a mobile hotspot. In one plug on the power outlet was the cord to my laptop - the other was a charger attached to my phone to prevent its battery drain. To minimize distractions, I wore a noise cancelling headset and listened to a background noise generator on my phone via bluetooth.

After some time, I had to go to the restroom. I trust the place enough to risk leaving my visibly ancient laptop unattended for a few moments. But my practice is to always lock the laptop, place the phone back on my belt holster and put the mouse in my pocket before walking away. The other day I didn't - I just walked away. But since I was still wearing the bluetooth headset, when I walked out of range the generated background noise stopped which jolted me into a quick realization I had left my phone unattended.

If I was worried about this happening again, what I probably would do is stop charging the phone with the charger and cable but, instead, keep my phone on my holster and maintain its charge by attaching it to a portable powerbank in my pocket.

So I think part of the solution on this is to see if there are hacks that would make it much more difficult for you to have an opportunity to part ways with valuable items in pretty much every ongoing or recurring circumstance in your life. That way, the ONLY time it would be as critical for you to be extra conscious and aware of there whereabouts is in circumstances that are a rare exception - for example, engaging in a physical activity you don't normally do where it wouldn't be practical to wear a phone and holster. As long as you can identify that such a circumstance is an out-of-the ordinary exception as soon as it comes up, then maintaining that extra conscientiousness will be easier.

[Dison]

OMG! I appreciate everything that you said. This is the stuff that I really need to hear. As you might expect I am very new at this, that is learning skills like this. Thank you!