Refusal of meds

[PinkMamabear1990]

Hello everyone. Does anyone have any exsperience with the following & how did you handle it?My 16yr old daughter has been diagnosed with ADHD combined & a potential mood disorder. She has tried Vyvanse & Concerta. Both have given her multiple negative side effects and extreme anxiety/panic attacks. She was in the middle of trying a non-stimulant med. (It takes 4 weeks for it to work & she took it for a week and a half). She now decided that she no longer is going to take her meds bc she doesn't like how they cause her anxiety & she said she feels "they dull her sparkel". I know shes 16 and the choice is hers. (RCMP & the doctors have informed me of this) But it does make me nervous. She hasn't taken any meds for 4 days now (today will be day 5). I'm nervous she is going to become very impulsive, reactive &, make negative decisions. Thankfully it is summer holidays. But once school starts, I'm nervous she won't get school work done, or attend classes and then get kicked out of school (she use to get distracted in the halls between classes & then be very late to class).

[MomOfSuperheroes]

I have an adult relative with ADHD who chooses not to take medication (even non-stimulants) because it worsens their anxiety disorder to the point where they cannot function. It's legit. I feel for you as a parent because you are in charge of this growing human, and you want the absolute best for them. Do you have a prescriber and/or therapist who can help you all talk through this latest medication experience before school starts?I can see how, at 16, your child has to be fully on board with their own treatment plan. I wonder if they can help troubleshoot their school problems in other ways if they've decided medication isn't for them (ie. decide on trying a wrist alarm that goes off before each class).

[PinkMamabear1990 in reply to MomOfSuperheroes]

I love this idea. I'm going to suggest it to her.

[Pema20]

ours tried meds and then stopped them for many of she same reasons. I had to let it go. She made it through high school, but often forgot or didn’t do assignments and impulsivity has been an issue. She has a therapist she likes and that has made a difference. It is incredibly hard to watch, but you just have to say, “it’s your choice, the right med is out there, let me know if you want to try again.” Maybe see if she would be willing to use an ADHD coach and find a therapist she loves. For you, all I have to say is it has been really hard watching my now 18 year old fumble through her teen years. We offer support and give her love, but parent-to-parent, it’s the hardest thing I have ever done. Hang in there.

[Mamamichl in reply to Pema20]

This is an amazing approach. Cudos!

[PinkMamabear1990 in reply to Pema20]

Thanks for sharing your experience. An ADHD coach? I've never heard of one before... not sure if we have one in our city. I'll look into it.

[Willowbee37]

instead of trying ADHD meds, have you just tried an anxiety medication?

[PinkMamabear1990 in reply to Willowbee37]

She takes trazadone but only 50mg to help her sleep

[Singlemom83]

I have had a similar situation with my daughter (15). Stimulants would cause panic attacks but we were lucky and found a non-stimulant that works for her (Qelbree). It didn't take very long for us to start seeing improvement with this medication. She does refuse to take any other medication but luckily she has a great therapist and we made a deal that she wouldn't have to take the additional medication (for anxiety) if she actively works on her mental health skills. This worked for her as her anxiety is mild at most and she is doing well in school . This is so hard to navigate especially as our kiddos get older and more independent. You are doing great and she is lucky to have such a supportive and understanding parent!

[Mamamichl]

I would respect her wish to keep from giving her trauma. Definitely talk to a doctor and make sure she discusses it with her therapist/counselor.

I fully understand that the medications could be giving her anxiety. It is possible that they are. She could also be putting it in her head. To give peace of mind, perhaps try having her take a Genesight test. My partner got aggressive on a medication and was cautious to try another, even though he knew it was helping his attentiveness and focus. He took a gene sight test, and it showed that he had moderate adverse effects on that med, but another one shown no adverse effects. He took that one and things have never been better. My gene sight test shows what medications I will have seed effects on and how extreme they can get, but it doesnt say what the side effect is. It also tests for all mental health medications, including depression, anxiety and bipolar. I wish that doctors made it more automatic when someone is diagnosed with a mental health condition, but we have to ask for it. If insurance doesn’t cover it, it can be expensive too.

How long was she taking the meds and going to school? Take note of her grades on the medications and let her start the year off of them. Talk to her doctors to take note of her behaviors and keep you in the loop for her academic performance. Then bring it up to her if it affects her performance or not. I dont know if it would be more effective telling her you are doing this over not.

Also, check in with her if she would like to try anxiety medications. Had I gotten anxiety meds but didnt recieve ADHD meds, I would have been fine. I did well with my grades, though assignments did take a lot longer, my biggest issue was socialization and communication. It still is. I do a ton better with my anxiety meds whether or not I am taking ADHD meds. I just like how I am better able to make decisions and move on, and be in the moment with the ADHD meds.

Hope this helps, zen hugs!

[PinkMamabear1990 in reply to Mamamichl]

Thank-you for these suggestions. I'm going to ask her psychiatrist about the genesight test. I've never heard of that being done here in Canada. I've onky heard about it from ppl in the USA.

Shes never been on medication while attending school. Last yr was the first yr of high school and the first semester went terrible (which is the first time in her life, usually she did really well & had really good grades). The second semester she decided to stay hone and do correspondence. That is when we learnt of her diagnosis & started doing meds. She made it through correspondence and now will be going back to in person school on the fall. I will track her grades and attendance. Thanks for the suggestions.

[PinkMamabear1990]

Thank-you everyone for your responses, insight and advice. I appreciate it. I have supported her decision at this pont and said i am here to help & support her through any thing. No matter what. We are thinking that there may be a mood disorder as well as the ADHD. And I feel the mood disorder is our many concern at this point but still supporting her wishes for no medication at this point. She has Alot of ups and downs and mood switches like a light switche. She has agreed to continue to take her 50mg of trazadone to help her sleep.... its been a week tomorrow w/o ADHD meds and she has had no anxiety or panic attacks. Which I am happy for her.... now to see if we can figure something out for her low moods. (The high moods we can all Handel and she is comfortable w/t)