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Any advice would be nice .

Catmom86 profile image
20 Replies

My daughter 5 was just diagnosed with ADHD and unspecified anxiety disorder. She is not angry doesnt hit or hurt herself or anyone but does get upset and cry .She can't stop talking and is like driven by motor! But also She can't sit still and is all up in your personal space when talking. She means well she really does but I struggle trying to help her !!! I refuse to put on meds at the moment but that was also (recommend by her pediatrician)(2 each thier own no judgement zone) plus she is only 5 and the pediatricians want me to "watch her over the next year) she starts kindergarden this fall ( after about 2 years in pre school she did make the age requirements to get into kindergarten. Also pediatrician told us to just let the teachers at her screening for kindergarten now what we have talked about so can watch over her for the next year... I feel helpless now and just want to learn how to help her I feel like she is always going going going ..I feel like im going to need a therapist for myself after all this :(

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Catmom86
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20 Replies
EJsMom profile image
EJsMom

This sounds a lot like my son when he was younger. Although he also had some anger issues. I did not try medication until my son asked me if he could try them, which was 7th grade. He said he didn’t like being in trouble all the time. At school, He was always speaking out of turn and getting out of his chair. We’ve tried many many meds. Not too successful.

One thing that helped at home was making him run around outside. At school I tried to ask if he could stand at his desk, within a defined space, but they said no. Honestly, school was not helpful. I hope your daughter has a better experience.

As far as therapy; I tried 3 of those for him and one for me. Nothing wrong with that!!

Catmom86 profile image
Catmom86 in reply toEJsMom

Yess we are always on move we are big hikers she could do 3 miles and still be full of energy it's insane !!! We currently have in home therapy who come in to help me dad and her and they try and teach us and her ways to cope .. my ask if your son chewed on stuff ? My daughyer also is a chewer of her shirts or pluses toys they say that's a sign of some sort I'm still learning . She also when upset she blames everyone but her self . It's hard this stuff and I feel awful because she is so young and I just want to fix everything but I struggle with stress and also because I'm new to all this and am learning . Motherhood don't cone with a handbook each child is so unique.

MunchkinMommy537 profile image
MunchkinMommy537

My son has both ADHD and anxiety, but the anxiety is what was really causing problems in school. I also have anxiety and depression, and didn’t treat mine for years. When I finally did it was so much better. That’s why I didn’t hesitate to treat my son’s anxiety, because I knew it would make his life better. You wouldn’t deny your daughter an inhaler if she had asthma, so why staunchly refuse to treat her anxiety? Anti-anxiety medicine doesn’t turn your into a zombie like many people think; it just quiets your mind so you can enjoy life. You say you feel helpless, but by refusing medication you’re taking away something that could genuinely help your daughter. I’m not saying this to place any judgement on you, but to let you know how medication has helped both me and my son. Good luck in whatever you decide.

Catmom86 profile image
Catmom86 in reply toMunchkinMommy537

Her pediatrician and the therapist are the ones that recommended I stay away from medication because she is only 5 they don't want to put that stuff in her body so I or should I say we have been doing yoga meditation other ways to help her with anxiety teaching her coping skills with our in-home therapy they asked me to watch her over the next year in to try these other steps before I tried medication which I absolutely agree with . I also struggle with depression and anxiety I struggle everyday and I know what it was like as a child for parents to just push a kid aside I'm not about to do that with my daughter but I also want to try Alternatives before I go right away to medication. Like I said to each thier own I'm not judging

Catmom86 profile image
Catmom86 in reply toCatmom86

And I apologize it was suppose to say I refuse to give medication because was recommended by her pediatrician. I was using voice text and was out of wack Cuz was up with a migraine.

Kellypeters profile image
Kellypeters

I feel for you! My son was very similar and also a chewer! I also did not want to give him medication and after a disastrous first year in school. I homeschooled him for two years. That was quite successful but he still had so many struggles. I decided to trial some medication just to see but was still very reluctant to use it. We tried Ritalin and it was disastrous. When it wore off he was worse than he had ever been before. I felt this was proof that meds were not the answer but we were convinced to trial Dex and we did. It was like night and day. He was SO much happier. He has been on Dex now for two years and although he still has challenges he is doing really well. I now would find it hard to take it away from him as it would seem very cruel. This is not everyones experience with meds and I don't know your reasons for not wanting to use them. But you might want to consider just a short trial to see what difference they could make in your situation. When I saw the results it really did seem like I was treating a disorder rather than drugging my kid. I wish you all the best whatever you decide to do. it is not easy and you are doing your best!

Catmom86 profile image
Catmom86 in reply toKellypeters

Thank you for replying and your Insight it's not that I don't believe in medication the pediatrician and the therapist in our in-home therapy just recommend over the next year we watch her and try to teach her coping mechanisms like yoga meditation things to help her she was just diagnosed not even a week ago

Kellypeters profile image
Kellypeters in reply toCatmom86

Ok with context I can see you are wise in waiting to make a good decision! My advice is to read! Read dr russel Barkley, you can watch him on you tube too - one called essential ideas for parents is good, read the book sensational kids - for ideas on sensory issues, read asd calming techniques as they work for all kids too sometimes. Read and read until you don’t need advice. It’s exhausting but worth it in the end as you are in for the long haul! I wish you all the best.

Catmom86 profile image
Catmom86 in reply toKellypeters

Thanks a hole bunch!!

Cjkchamp profile image
Cjkchamp

Occupational therapy would be good to consider. It helped tech me ways to deal with my son. His anxiety showed up first with his hewing in his shirts. I would pick him up from preschool and the neck would be around his shoulders. Then he started sucking in his lip until it was raw. I got him those chew toys and he was not having it. After he started medication those things went away, but considering your thoughts on it there are more natural routes to consider. I would recommend looking for an integrative medicine psychiatrist. The one we met recommended first placing him on magnesium glycinate. Read up on it and see what you think. She said doses of lacking vitamins and minerals often help kids just as well as medication. Good luck!

Catmom86 profile image
Catmom86 in reply toCjkchamp

Thank you for your Insight yes I've been looking at those two Fabrics on Amazon and I was going to try them out not sure how much luck I'll have with them but it's worth a shot I do in home therapy now two ladies come out to my house twice a week to help me her father and my daughter with coping skills they've been here since March but she was just diagnosed not even a week ago so the pediatrician just wants us to watch her over the next year and help teach her ways to cope so that's what I'm doing but I'm also doing my research along the way on other alternatives

kathybranson profile image
kathybranson

I feel your pain😢. Raising almost 5 yr old granddaughter and our life sounds a lot like yours.

Catmom86 profile image
Catmom86 in reply tokathybranson

I wish you the best. *hugs*

anirush profile image
anirush

Sometimes immaturity contributes. You can see how she does in kindergarten. But if nothing else works and she's constantly in trouble at least consider medication.

Both of my grandsons have been on it since kindergarten. They wouldn't have been able to be successful in school without it. My oldest grandson is 13 and doing really well. I don't see that medication affect him adversely. His mother started in 3rd grade stayed on meds all through High School, and has a college degree and a good job right now.

Catmom86 profile image
Catmom86

We do not have any behavior issues at this time ..thanks for your time and reply . Over the next year I will watch and learn.

Pennywink profile image
Pennywink

Sounds a lot like my son! I thought he was only quiet when he slept - and then one night I heard him sleep talking, too. lol! We did an ADHD assessment at age 5, but the pediatrician did not diagnose at the time - we were "wait and see when he's 6." (He was officially diagnosed at his 6 year check up.) He isn't a behavior problem, just super chatty, talking over people, and lots of off task behavior / distraction.

What sorta helped for us in the meantime was just practicing appropriate conversation behavior, while explaining what was expected ahead of time. Teaching him to raise his hand if he has something to say while someone else is talking. Part of his issue is that his working memory isn't very good, so he blurts out everything before he forgets it. Haven't found the solution, but things are slowly getting better.

Catmom86 profile image
Catmom86 in reply toPennywink

Thanks so much for your info :) I appreciate it .

Pennywink profile image
Pennywink in reply toCatmom86

Sure thing! Now that my son can read, having signs, checklists & charts for everything really helps him deal with his memory issues. May need to find / make one for conversational skills. :)

Catmom86 profile image
Catmom86 in reply toPennywink

I have a few charts thanks to in home therapy. They work well .

Teresa12626 profile image
Teresa12626

I would let her school she is going into know and if she doesn't already have one get her a 504 plan or a iep for school you have to request them. There are sample letters for both online. If you get her one of those she can have accommodations to help her at school.

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