We are struggling these winter weekends, with our almost 9 year old with combined type ADHD. He is a very "busy" kid, mind and body always running. He resists when we have lots of planned activities because he says he wants to relax in the weekends, but frankly I don't think his mind or body let him slow down. He ends up literally climbing the walls, breaking toys from playing rough, fighting with siblings, etc. The week is fine with the activity and socialization at school and practices a couple nights a week, it feels like a nice balance.
He plays a sport that has one game every weekend for an hour, but the rest of the time is unstructured and it's quite cold where we live so going outside is not enjoyable longer than an hour or two. I'm curious how other families handle weekends (or what you did when your kids were this age). Open to all ideas and advice!
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RunnerMomof3
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Does he like podcasts? Mine has similar schedule but lives playing Lego or other toy for few hours while listening. Think combination of hands and ears busy keeps him engaged, and quiet 😊.
Hi- my children are a bit older now .. when my daughter (adhd) was younger we signed her up for many classes at outschool.com. She enjoyed the classes , it kept some kind of routine in weekend and truthfully it was and is cheaper than babysitting. They have classes specifically for kids with adhd or you can find a class that you think your child would find interesting. We have always had to keep classes ( math tutoring ) or something in the weekend otherwise unwanted behaviors surfaced.
Are there indoor activities in your area that you'd feel comfortable taking your son to? In our area (near Washington, DC) there are a ton of indoor entertainment centers offering (depending on center/facility) climbing walls, trampolines, bounce houses, or other sorts of play structures. Not to mention kid-friendly gyms (e.g. My Gym).
Obviously depends on your budget (some of these places are $20-$25 or more for a couple of hours) and how worried you are about potential Covid exposure. But perhaps worth investigating what's around you.
We have a similar challenge with our 10 year old son who on weekends was having lots of tantrums because he couldn't handle the unstructured time and boredom that came with it! He also isn't allowed to play his video games during the school week so he wants to spend his entire weekend on screens. We had to write out a schedule mapping out the whole day like school, specifying 15 min, 45 min or 1 hour stretches. We have things like "read," "snack," "screen time," "Pokemon cards," etc. We also use outschool.com, and he does D&D (good LONG activity), and an indoor sport activity like rock climbing or Ninja. I think it takes away his anxiety of being bored. I keep it generally the same every weekend so I am not having to remap it out every time. It's not easy but we find it helps with the tantrums.
We live in California but still, we move our cars outside and let him have the entire garage to himself, we have nets and balls in there and he can be in there for as many hours as he needs. We also have indoor basketball, treadmill, "dummy" to kick and punch. we try to balance activities that are seated with gross motor stuff. There are great online games that are more educational: chess, yoga, coding... etc. So you can balance it out. There is even an App for "green screen" where you have a box with parts and create a robot and then make up your own movie with it .
Perhaps I can convince you to "re-cast" the cold as an asset. I, too, live in a cold area (our last 3 ski days were -2, 0, and 5 degrees Fahrenheit-need to keep exposed skin covered) and there is nothing that I have found for running the energy out of a child with ADHD that's superior to outdoor activities in the cold. We started my son in ski lessons at around age 6. Ski lessons are great because the kids get to spend time with a patient teenager and if you are a skier, you get a couple of hours to ski while they are occupied (or, like my wife, you can enjoy a cup of tea and a book). It's also a great way to provide social interaction because finding other boys or girls to ski with is usually easy. Now that he's a teenager, it provides a great activity that we can do together. It can be cold, but it is not hard to stay warm with proper gear, and there is little in life that I find more comforting (or satisfying) than getting warm after outdoor activities (I don't know how people live without it!). In just a few hours (sometimes we may only take 6 runs), he is wiped out and able to relax the rest of the day and weekend. If you really cannot stand the cold, let me suggest snow shoeing. If you've never done it, it feels like hiking with swim flippers on. Fun and exhausting. The biggest mistake I made on early treks was not knowing how warm we'd get and having insufficient storage for pealed off layers. Getting too warm and sweaty is more of a problem than being too cold. Either way, the thermos of hot cider or hot cocoa waiting in the vehicle is a welcomed break. The activity we never find enough time for is snow tubing, It's another activity which really zaps the energy (big hills with lots of climbing through snow). The other tip I'll share when dealing with a 9 year old is to not put your warm clothes on before he is completely ready to go. If your son is like mine was at 9, layering up for outdoor fun is time-consuming and involves a degree of wresting (think of getting Randy from "A Christmas Story" ready for school). Keeping your cooler clothes on until he is dressed will keep you from overheating. We are very active in the warmer weather, too (unless it's too hot), but as noted, nothing seems to zap the energy like brisk cold outdoor activities. For us, the exertion in the cold outdoors allows my son to relax the rest of the weekend and improves focus by taking away that extra (need to move) energy. Just a thought. It works for us.
That is so true! We actually hiked for a few hours with friends yesterday (weather in the teens) and he was in heaven. I'm very lucky that he is an outdoorsy kid because I love being outside - I run outside in all weather because I just hate being indoors.I think what we run into is that we often have cold without snow, snow definitely makes things more fun but I appreciate your perspective and definitely need to think outside my box (for example, I've never skied) a little bit. Thank you!
You're welcome. I never skied until my mid 30's. I'll never be an expert, but it's fun. If cold but no snow, what about pond, river, lake skating? I bought one of those tall propane heaters like restaurants have on their decks. I'd love to drag that out on the ice for an afternoon of fun, but too much snow and everyone hates to shovel! Glad you got outdoors despite the cold. Be well.
You already have lots of great ideas here, but I just wanted to say I could have written your post! Thank you for putting it out there. I know for us, being indoors for more than a couple of hours is a recipe for disaster. We dress for the weather and just get out. He will happily play soccer all day long. Sledding is great. Geo-caching. Bike riding. Indoors he absolutely loves a card game called Dungeons of Mayhem - he could play it for ages.
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