What to do next?

[HawkyMom]

Hi there. My 7 year old son is in the middle of his adhd diagnosis. We were filling out the questionnaire again (2nd year) with his teacher. The doctor said she is sure he has adhd but we needed to complete the papers before moving forward. With the Corona virus everything has stopped. Teaching at home is a challenge. He doesn’t focus and is all over the place. I am learning about medications to help him focus. Also learning about IEP’s. I am worried about him starting school next year and was hoping to see if the medications would help him. Anyone have any advice for me?

[Lauraz180]

we were diagnosed at 8 and have been on meds for just over a year. The world post meds is not perfect but it is dramatically improved and i would not go back to before for school ! We only use for school work. i would say focus is pretty much a "normal level" just some residual points to deal with around executive function. In this covid world i am working on those myself and seeing that providing structure and techniques to overcome these is having a real impact.

[HawkyMom in reply to Lauraz180]

Thank you!

[momwifedaughtersis]

Hello HawkyMom. My son is 7, soon to be 8, with a fairly recent ADHD diagnosis. We only started medicine in February, and were increasing the dose gradually... I think we were seeing some improvement at school but then Corona hit. I thought he might be having some side effects so we stopped the medicine 2 weeks ago... but the problem issues continued so I guess it's not the meds. (Therapist thinks it's anxiety-related which probably many of us are feeling these days!) Anyway now I am thinking to start the medicine again, in hopes that I can get him to crank out some schoolwork in the morning. Trying to get him to do the assignments is TORTURE for both of us. This morning he could not sit still and listen to a 2-minute teacher video. Even though I know it's not his fault, I was still getting so frustrated and angry at him (my fuse is so short especially bc I'm stressed about not getting my own work done). I think you'll find some great tips here... There is so much information out there. My favorite expert is Russell Barkley. He has some great talks on YouTube. Good luck!

[HawkyMom in reply to momwifedaughtersis]

Thank you for sharing your feelings and your advice. I’m happy to hear someone else feels the same as I do. My patience is wearing thin and I have been yelling way too much. We just purchased a trampoline and I am going to use that for breaks from school work. I have a 9 year old daughter who is feeling very left out because a lot of my time is trying to help my son focus on his work. Trying to balance it all, with my work, and keep my cool...I’m having a hard time. I have also had some people comment on “drugging” my kid so I can deal better. It makes me feel horrible and that’s one of the reasons I was against meds at first. I want to do what’s best for my son.

[RichSeitzOceanNJ]

For some strategies for home google Pax Tools and watch the videos on You Tube. Keep things short, plenty of breaks, reward with physical activities (finish this page and we will play catch). Pax has hundreds of ideas for rewards that don't cost a penny. Google Pax GBG for more information.

[HawkyMom in reply to RichSeitzOceanNJ]

Thank you!

[mplaz]

Hello! If he has ADHD, medications will definitely help him. We were very hesitant to start meds, but we have seen really good results. My advice to you is just to be patient because it may take a little while to find the right med & dosage.

In the meantime, positive reinforcement works best, so if, for example, he’s begging to play video games, tell him he can play 10 minutes of video games after he finishes his math, or whatever. Then, when he finishes, give him his reward, and set a timer. When the timer goes off, move to the next assignment and give him a reward when that is finished too. Give breaks, lots of physical activity time off, run around blow off steam, sit down again and do an assignment.

Oh and we found that rewards don’t always have to be very big. Sometimes just a hug, or a high five or a “great job, I’m proud of you for working so hard!” works just as well.

Best of luck!

[HawkyMom in reply to mplaz]

Thank you so much for the advice and taking the time to respond!!

[mplaz in reply to HawkyMom]

Of course

[Onthemove1971]

It looks like you are new to our community.. welcome we are always here for you and most likely if you are struggling with something either we have been there done that or someone else is also struggling with this issue.

As far as medications are concerned for helping children with ADHD there are some that help with focus and some that help stop the symptoms of impulsive behavior ( like excessive talking, obnoxious behavior ( not typical boy behavior), not sitting still,etc). What we learned is that our son needed both types of medication. All kids are different. We also greatly benefited from a child Psychiatrist, even though we started with our Pediatrician.

In addition, where are tools that can help him in school ( either a 504 plan or and IEP) he will defiantly need this to support his learning. His needs will get greater the older he gets, so better to start young with a plan in place.

You can take things at your own pace it is all overwhelming ...

Medication when it is the correct type, dose and timing will help a lot!

This is also a process and rarely happens right away. Depending on the medication you should notice a different within the first few days. It is important to strive to get him to be the best he can be not just a little better. This will make sense once you guys decide on the dose of medication, specialist know best what dose, time and type.

Just know we are here for you ... the journey is long but we have all lived through it.

Take care,

[HawkyMom in reply to Onthemove1971]

Thank you so much for your reply and advice. Totally new to this community and I’m already feeling better just reading about others. I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed with getting things in place for school in September. I have made a follow up appointment with our child physiologist for July. I can get the papers filled out and emailed to her and hopefully his teacher can as well. Thanks so much!!

[Onthemove1971 in reply to HawkyMom]

In work in the public school system and my son has a written 504 plan so reach out if you need help.

Big hug as you stress through this process.

[Janice_H]

Hello, see if the teacher is able to complete the questionnaire and get it back to you by e-mail. You can then forward the questionnaire along to your child's doctor for review.

Home teaching is a challenge for everyone, especially those that have to also work full time during the day. That leaves only a couple of hours to focus on school work and personal care. It is draining. I'm home teaching my 12 y.o. with ADHD and work full time. What has helped me is to lower my expectations and shorten any lessons or assignments that the teachers have given. I also communicate with them if we are having difficulties.

For now, do you best with home teaching. If your doctor can prescribe meds, great. You will be able to monitor any side effects and changes while you are home with him. There are a lot of great resources online that can help you learn about your son's condition, the IEP process and other questions you may have. Try CHADD or ADDitude.com.

[HawkyMom in reply to Janice_H]

Thanks you! I have signed up for CHADD to learn more. It’s great so far.