Wiped out

[overwhelmed5]

My daughter just had the biggest meltdown over my not letting her eat pringles for breakfast. Screaming and shouting for a good 10 minutes or more. I am completely wiped out by it

[Onthemove1971]

Not a fun way to start the day.

Behavior is communication..

I consider myself a detective and try to find out what else is going on when this happens.

Any thoughts?

I am hoping after she calms down you guys can talk and figure it out.

Take care of yourself during these trying times.

Big hug.

[Tinyhuman]

I get it. My son had a 30 minute meltdown tonight over having to take a shower. Kicking stuff, dead weight laying on the floor, mean-mugging me, yelling, the works. It is exhausting. You're not alone❤

[plantdoc]

Uuuuggghhhh....I feel you. My son fights every.step.of.the.day. From waking up to eating breakfast to taking his medicine to brushing his teeth to getting his shoes on, etc. etc. etc. I try to look ahead and predict what will cause fights and resistance and head it off (rarely am successful), and it's exhausting!

As for food, I try really, really hard not to make it all a big deal, but sometimes that's a real challenge. Do you think you could compromise on a few Pringles and some fruit? Or some other mom-approved breakfast? I rarely make a big deal over *what* my kids eat for breakfast as long as it contains some decent amount of protein, fiber, vitamins. Burrito? Sure. Leftover pizza? Go for it. An apple with peanut butter? Perfect. But my son also takes medication, which limits his appetite most of the day, so I can sometimes be less picky about what he eats.

Anyway, I hope you get a moment to take a few deep breaths and regain your day. (My worst habit is allowing meltdowns like those to ruin my entire day.)

[Mmagusin]

We’re you able to find the strength to ignore her?

[anirush]

With time you learn some things aren't worth fighting over. My grandson refused to wear long pants, wore shorts even if it was below freezing outdoors. The counselor finally said he is not going to be outside long enough to get frostbite, if it doesn't bother him why should it bother you. So I started letting him wear shorts to school, one battle eliminated!

[Desparate4Help in reply to anirush]

I had this same battle for the first 5 years of his life and I chose not to have that battle not one more day and it has been wonderful and he has never gotten sick from wearing shorts in GA in 25 degree weather. I chose not to battle over clothes period. Food as well to a certain extent. The tantrums and fits wear us all down, but we just have to persevere and realize that we CAN do this one day at a time. Reading up on books and different resources out there as how to best cope and deal with ADHD children are really helping me understand and deal much better.

[Nats2005 in reply to Desparate4Help]

Glad to hear we're not the only one who battles our little guy over clothes! I can generally get him in pants, though right now lined chinos or sweatpants are all he wants to wear. But trying to convince him he needs more than a short-sleeve shirt and hoodie in 30-degree weather is a challenge. Someone told me kids with ADHD "run hot" so don't feel the cold as much.

[Desparate4Help in reply to Nats2005]

I believe this to be true by experience. My boy will sweat in 25 degree weather with shorts and short sleeves. He is definitely hot-blooded and doesn't like being hot at all. It is funny what you say about your son's clothing because mine wears the short sleeves with a hoodie too along with shorts, but just in the past few weeks he has been wearing the sports leggings under his shorts. I really never knew how much children were affected by ADHD until mine was diagnosed and I joined this group. Glad to have this support group to help me understand and know that I am not the only one going through all of this.

[reg2018]

I'm so sorry. That's so hard.

I was going to say food has been a big issue for one of my boys - but really - everything is an issue. I don't know about your daughter, but for my son, it's about control and not being told what to do about anything.

And while as parents we do our best to create as harmonious an atmosphere as possible, and even compromise where possible when it comes to food because of medication, we're also parents who have a responsibility to teach our children about healthy choices for their bodies and healthy boundaries in relationships - because you deserve to be treated with respect.

And that's an exhausting job to maintain your boundary with a child who challenges it day in and day out.

Just don't forget how amazing you are - and that you're doing an amazing job!

[seller]

Just a few suggestions: I was always up earlier than my son and I used to wake him up, slip him his ADHD pill and let him go back to sleep for about 20 min. This allowed some of the meds to start working and he was not nearly as defiant early in the morning. The other suggestion: can your daughter eat breakfast at school? That would eliminate the breakfast battle. My son used to eat breakfast at school occasionally. Finally, if she is having an epic meltdown, I would ignore her. Stick something kind of healthy in her backpack if she goes to school with no breakfast.

[Janice_H]

How old is your daughter? My 12 y.o. has meltdowns over the smallest things. One time his ice cream cone fell on the ground, he decided that one side was still clean and he could eat it anyway. I made him throw it out. He had a meltdown outside in the yard crying loudly, screaming, saying he hated himself and wanted to die. He came inside and was throwing things, banging and trashed his room. It lasted for about half hour. I'm sure the neighbors thought I was abusing him. (so embarrassing)

He still has the meltdowns every now and then. Sometimes he bangs his head on the wall or threatens to stab himself. They can get scary.

[trinitylynn53]

Why couldn’t she have the pickles? You don’t have to eat it. Lol mine eat pickles for breakfast all the time. It comes down to power struggle.