Never thought I’d be here(IEP;504;MEDS) - CHADD's ADHD Pare...

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Never thought I’d be here(IEP;504;MEDS)

Niko2012 profile image
14 Replies

I’m a mother that has a 7 year old who has been through many different stages of this journey with an ADHD child. He has had an IEP since kindergarten, changed to multiple different schools, environments and at this point residential care. This is never where I though my we’d be.

BUT I will say that even though I was a mother stood against what I thought was giving up up on him and the thought of residential care baffled my mind, he’s made tremendous progress behaviorally, emotionally and is for the first time getting educated while learning self regulation with the support of residential care.

We had to go completely out of our comfort and expertise to make a huge decision like this but only with the progress I have seen can I vouch that though this is a sacrifice it’s also an investment long term.

I live in CA where the resources are limited and have been through so many cycles of placement but for any parent that feels there is no hope, there are programs out there that can help. My son was 2 hours away which we thought was the absolute end to all, but still

Wasn’t receiving the school component so he is now in TX at a facility that invests in him every step of the way. Now it’s not for all, but the progress now shows me otherwise. If you have any questions or think there is no answers please reach out.

14 Replies
Pennywink profile image

Thank you for sharing your story! I’ll pray for continued improvement in TX and healing for you all. 😊

Niko2012 profile image
Niko2012 in reply to Pennywink

🙏🏼 thank you

Crunchby profile image

Thanks for sharing. I have investigated residential options as well. I also had the same thoughts you expressed. Would you mind sharing what was going on to that made you choose residential? Also would u mind sharing a bit about the program? How long is it? What are they doing for him? Really any details would be appreciated. Thanks!

Niko2012 profile image
Niko2012 in reply to Crunchby

We chose residential as an absolute last option, no programs were working, we had onsite therapist, WRAP around services, complete school and parent involvement and if anything it was getting worse. Residential helped him

Become acclimated with daily living, other peers, and structure. I know as much as we try as parents sometimes it’s just not enough because when they go to school and they are with our kids more than us, so that’s truly the biggest part of their day which is outside influence flowing into the home. Sometimes also as patents we cater to their inability to do things so it hinders them to be successful. It’s all for love but again the structure the residential has is more of tough love and guidance. They have therapy, staff trained for behavior and constant coping skills to offer these kiddos. It’s not easy and a huge sacrifice. When we visit now, he’s grateful and knows what the behavior can lead him to. It requires a lot of trust to put your kiddo on the hands of strangers but because we’ve had amazing results I know it’s just a short term investment for long term results. Let me know if you have any other questions I’m so glad to share this experience and journey because of the results. The 1st residential he was in for 4 months, and this second round now has the school component which is the final step to him coming home to learn how to be in a school setting. So I would say a total of a year depending on results and his success. And again it’s a long term investment. He’s doing the best he’s ever done!

ChristinaVesq profile image

Thank you for sharing- my 8 year old has had a very hard transition to 3rd grade and we can’t get a handle on a medication that works for him (focalin was great when he was first diagnosed last year but after upping the dose twice it totally stopped working- were on 20 of vyvanse since last week and I don’t see it working at all- calls from school, family dynamic total disaster and my own mental health in the toilet). Hearing you found something that is helping your son is so positive- I wish you all the best and keep us posted on his progress and next steps.

Onthemove1971 profile image
Onthemove1971 in reply to ChristinaVesq

I know this process is very hard, please know many of use have been there and are now very stable. There are so many options and with a good child psychiatrist you will find something.

I know many people have done the gene testing for medication, I wonder if that.would help you?

Big hugs in knowing it will get better.

Niko2012 profile image

Thank you all sharing, asking questions, this has become my passion not only for my son but mental/emotional help for what limited resources there are.

I will start with the meds; we tried focaline and it was not right for him, they just kept wanting to increase with very minimal results. We were against stimulants but resorted to it In the end and it’s worked wonders. He is now on a very low dose of adderal and tenex. Impulsivity is way down and he’s extremely more manageable, it’s slowed him down a bit but not making him

A zombie.

AndreaG713 profile image


I live in Texas and was wondering what the residential place is called. I have a 16yo son who has struggled tremendously and has dropped out of school. I have thought many times about a residential place to get him “rebooted”, but can’t find a good place. We’ve seen 8 psychologists and 2 psychiatrists.

He has PTSD from events in 7th grade and really bad anxiety. Homeschool did not work for us, and I’m exhausted! Would love to know the place that you are talking about! Thanks!

AndreaG713 profile image

What’s the name of the residential place in Texas? See my previous post. My 16 yo needs so much help! We’ve tried everything else I know besides residential. I would like to look into that place! Thanks!

Niko2012 profile image
Niko2012 in reply to AndreaG713

This place is wonderful so far; it’s in Victoria TX it’s called Devereux advanced behavioral health.

Depending on his situation the district can place him there.

We’re in San Diego but his school district works closely with this facility due to the success rate so the district pays for his placement. Let me know if you have any other questions I’m so glad to help.

AndreaG713 profile image
AndreaG713 in reply to Niko2012

Thank you so much! I’m going to look into it. We are almost desperate. I know that our school district doesn’t pay for these things. My son is very depressed, ADHD, Aspergers and a ton of anxiety. It’s very sad. Good luck to you! How long has your son been there? How long will he stay?

Niko2012 profile image
Niko2012 in reply to AndreaG713

Hi! I wasn’t sure if you got my last message but he will be there 9 months to a year. He’s only been there 1 week but he was at a previous residential facility for about 4 months, and with that structure it helped him tremendously! Let me know if you have any other questions! Glad to help

SDIC profile image

Thanks for sharing! Such a hard path as a parent, but it sounds like this is a good direction for you son, you and your family! We're in a wrap-around situation that's working (so far). Tough journey to get here. I'm glad to know there are other paths that can be successful.

Niko2012 profile image
Niko2012 in reply to SDIC

Thank you! It’s definitely a journey! Glad to hear wrap around is working 💙

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