Hi everyone I am looking for advice. My son is 9 and was diagnosed with ADHD 6 months ago. Since he was diagnosed he has been on a very low dose of Adirol and it has helped at school. However, he still struggles with his extracurricular activities (karate and cub scouts). His behavior isn't too bad but he has a hard time remembering which moves go with which command during karate and the oaths / rules that go along with Cub Scouts. Both of these activities have become increasingly demanding as he has become older and they are starting to feel more like a source of anxiety / stress on top of the problems he already has with school. I am just wondering how other parents have approached this problem?
Do we take him out to reduce the stress? Or is that just letting ADHD tell us what to do and giving up? I don't want to keep him at home just to avoid dealing with the struggle. That seems lazy and like we are giving into defeat. However, I also don't want to keep pushing him to do something that only makes him feel bad about himself. Are there other parents that understand what I am describing?
Written by
emadrid
To view profiles and participate in discussions please or .
Hi, I can understand. I'm no expert but having 3 (out of 5) kids w/ADHD in addition to myself I do have some experiences to share. First, play memory games every day! Find good old classics, find new ones online, look for computer games and even create some compatition w/ you, a friend or relative. Teach him to play solitaire, that is something you can do on line and with a deck of cards. Make it fun for him to strengthen his memory! I also found that creating a memory game using things the kids are struggling with as cards themselves, WOW that made learning multiplication tables a lot easier. If he's into cars create 2 pictures of cars on index cards start with him matching 10 sets then 14, then 20. When he gets to this point you could challenge him with a time. Can you find all 20 in 90 seconds? He doesn't have to get a "prize" though he will develop pride!
Also, playing Ping Pong is wonderful. We had a rule when they were growing up that on Wednesdays there were no screens. No TV, no phones, no computers except homework which gets done in the family room or kitchen not away where they can be sneaky. No going over to someones house after school ( I learned that one the hard way) These Wednesdays ended up being a lot of fun and we've had great Ping Pong games and challenges on Wednesday nights.
Keeping a routine and structure is important and working in a game time each day will be a real asset. He also needs to understand that life comes with lots of curves in the road, so he needs to be a good driver in order to steer through the difficult and unexpected twist and turns or even a sudden STOP. This was a lesson that 2 of my kids needed constant reminders for.
One of which went into the Air Force and is now a lieutenant in the fire department- talk about unpredictable days at work! Haha
Good luck hope my long winded suggestions and stories help.
Hello welcome to my world. My boy is 6 and has the same challenges with karate.
My first piece if advice is , you have have to choose one or the other. Both can carry a lit if demand with rules in order to advance and earn badges. The boy scouts has a disability inclusion section that you want to check out and the could ease your stress on that. Karate is actually designed for those that can move at a quick pace , who can remember complex techniques and form.
When we started karate 2 years ago we were having fun and didn't think about the challenging factors that lay ahead. Then we seen seen new students after new new students move up rapidly without having to practice their form over and over again. He just earned his orange belt in January with no strips as if yet. It could be next week next month, I don't know.
They say he knows his stuff but when asked to perform a certain task he too often has trouble getting started and has to start over several times.
When we question what's going on we get comments like he has to be able to to remember his firm without help. He will remember more and linger than the kids who breeze through it.
Most martial arts is not designed for kids with attention and memory issues because it all builts up on the ladt lesson. My boy is constantly look at himself in the mirror instead of putting his focus in the direction of his target (bad guy). There are others out there that would be welcoming, I didn't search those out for whatever reason.
He also participates in swimming and soccer training. And others sports which he has a little difficulty.
With all that said, you may want to look for a sport that doesn't require so much attention and for karate if you can search the internet for videos on 8 block and the sticks and kicks that accompany a white belt and over time he will learn the rules if the dojo because they will repeat often for incoming students.
Stay in touch, I live to gear about his progress in either karate or scouts!!!
Hello, I know how you feel, my son has been involved in many sports and struggled with the demands of coaching or the environment and we also wanted to show him not to give up but he continued feeling frustrated so we started exploring things he felt comfortable doing and more enjoyable from accomplishing something he loved like swimming and hiking. This way he was not confined but could exert his energy and still be interactive. Unfortunately with ADHD there is a power struggle with demands that frustrate them. It’s taught my son how to play with other children appropriately without being so confined. If swimming is something he takes a liking to there is the heartland swim association or the YMCA so it can still be a competitive sport. Keep exploring things he may enjoy more comfortably with his abilities. I hope this helps.
Perhaps, deep inside, he doesn't really love those activities. My daughter is in Taekwondo and she is doing really good because she loves it and thus, hyper focus on the sport. She is now in her second year and, today, she is testing for black/red belt. What she does fear are competitions. So she hasn't done any because of her anxiety. She also does horseback ridding and excels. However, she takes Focalin XL in the morning and the she takes short action focalin after she comes from school to help her attention and focus with homework and extracurricular activities. So far, we have been very blessed with treatment. We also have cognitive behavioral therapy weekly and remove iPad use during weekdays.
I think the key here is to exposed them to many activities and see which one he likes and has a natural talent for it. Good luck!
My son is 23 now and will still tell me that exercise is one of the things that really helps with ADHD. (He still plays league soccer and has been a soccer ref as a job since he was 13.) He did take taekwondo for years, but he also took an evening dose of a short-acting stimulant before class. He was a cub scout for about 2 years. Soccer was best for us - there was lots of running and the younger kids didn't have too many rules. I would really try hard to keep him involved in something because the exercise is great and it's an opportunity to make friends. I will also mention that he may need a higher dose of Adderall.....remember the dosing has nothing to do with age or size. My son always ended up on the highest doses of all his ADHD meds no matter how old he was. Don't get hung up on the dosage - you want the adjust both the medication and the dose until it works.
Is he excelling at either activity? If he's doing poorly & not interested / having anxiety, then finding something he is interested in or plays to his strengths will help.
My son is not athletic at all, so all attempts at organized sports have gone poorly & we don't try anymore. So, we just do low key family hikes or swimming or playing for exercise, and stick to one extra curricular in a field of his interest so he can feel successful. He does sometimes want to drop that, but as I know it's something he is good at & typically enjoys, I wait a bit on those types of activities & eventually he comes back around.
Both of my grandsons are black belts in Taekwondo but it took them yours longer to get that than most kids. One dealt with major anxiety but we found a studio with such patient instructors. The other one used to have lots of focus issues but the further along he got us the more he enjoyed it and got excited and was able to focus better. Adjustments in medication helped.
Both were also in Cub Scouts but that was more of a challenge. Meetings were in the evening when there is medicine was wearing off. But they enjoyed it and there was usually a lot of dodgeball or basketball at the end of meetings. They didn't go into Boy Scouts though. Those meetings are Scout run with a lot of overnights and weekends camping. Didn't think they could handle that.
We tried baseball one summer ,there was too much standing around to keep attention spans in check
Content on HealthUnlocked does not replace the relationship between you and doctors or other healthcare professionals nor the advice you receive from them.
Never delay seeking advice or dialling emergency services because of something that you have read on HealthUnlocked.
Seeking activities that keep interest of 12 year old boy with ADHD
Advice to parents with ADHD children
ADHD and mildly Gifted
my 5 year old with adhd 
