Hi this is my first post and I’m hoping to receive some input. I’m a 23 female & This post may be all over the place because how I’m feeling is all over the place currently and I’m not sure if there is something particularly wrong with me or what is going on but I have been feeling this way for awhile. I feel that could have possible depression and anxiety disorder but I’m not totally sure I may just be over thinking things.
through out everyday I am often very lethargic. I used to sleep around 12 hours everyday which just made me super tired throughout the day and I have always had these puffy bags under my eyes and wonder why if I’m getting enough sleep. So I have tried to rearrange my sleep schedule getting around 8-10 hours of sleep per night, but I still have the feeling of being tired throughout almost everyday. I have very low energy, don’t feel like getting out of bed most days, when I do get out of bed I’m usually very moody and have to force myself to try to be in a good mood. In a lot of situations talking to new people or even sometimes people I know well makes me uncomfortable and anxious. I’m always pretty fidgety or shaky. I’ve had this weird thing happen where sometimes my face will feel really hot and feel like it’s twitching when talking to people at random times which is really odd to me. Ive always been pretty awkward but have felt I’ve grown out of some of my tendencies. The only time I really feel like going out with friends anymore is to the bar.
I have also been struggling with this feeling of not being good enough. I’ve had a boyfriend of almost 2 years who decided to end things with me and it has made me uncontrollably cry for weeks at random moments & the feeling that he could care less about me consumes my thoughts. Someone that you love and have tried so hard to be the best for them decides to break you off like you’re just nothing. How could they do that? I feel very alone, all my friends are in relationships & barely talk to me anymore. Idk how to make new friends I feel like people just can’t connect with me. I feel like my bf was my only friend and without him i don’t have anyone & I don’t want to do anything. The thought of him being with someone else makes me want to die. I honestly am afraid of how I will feel if that moment comes.
I often find myself very jealous of other people as well.
I also very overwhelmed with my job and have to convince myself not to quit everyday. I just don’t care about it at all. I feel a lot of the time my life has no meaning and I’m always going to feel like I’m not good enough. I have no motivation & no ambition.