Sad times

[wombat3838]

Hi All, this is the first time I have been on here for over a week. Sadly I lost my father in a tragic accident. Taking it one day at a time but concerned I am turning to food in my grief. Have been thinking today I may do a fun run in his honour but if I undo all my hard work I won't be able. Has anyone had to cope with this to?

[OlsBean]

I've not personally and I can only offer words of encouragement for your diet and condolences for your loss.

I think the Fun Run is an excellent idea.

Once again condolences for you Sad Loss.

[wombat3838 in reply to OlsBean]

Thank you Olsbean. Your support means a lot 😢

[JuliaM72]

Ahh Wombat so sorry to hear your sad news. I hope you are ok and managing to cope with all the grief and stress you are under. If It was me I would take time to get through the grief then start afresh when you feel up to it. Try and keep busy rather than feeding your emotions but it's easier said than done. I hope you can continue with your good work but don't get down about small excesses of food. Keep yourself well and hope you get through this sad time. x

[wombat3838 in reply to JuliaM72]

Thanks Julia, we are all bearing up taking care of each other as best we can. Perhaps you are right, just so hard to function right now

[JuliaM72 in reply to wombat3838]

I can't even begin to imagine how hard it is for you. Just take care and look after yourself and each other. If you want an ear we are always hear to listen. xx

[Nomoreexcuses 2lbs]

Gosh that's awful. The fun run sounds a great idea but please don't put pressure on yourself to diet or exercise at such a sad time.

Look after yourself. Big hugs.

[wombat3838 in reply to Nomoreexcuses]

Thank you nomoreexcuses

[Anna999]

Oh that's awful hun, sending you big hugs, I'm so sorry for your loss 🌺 the fun run sounds like a good idea, I'm sure your dad would be do proud, you could channel some of that grief (and the range of other emotions) into training for it? Have you used couch to 5k? There is nothing you can do to take your mind off of it but trying to keep to your daily routine could help you cope better with your eating. Certainly don't beat yourself up about comfort eating in this situation,you already have so much to deal with! All the best 🌸 x

[wombat3838 in reply to Anna999]

Thank you Anna, one day at a time is what I'm trying with the love and support of my family and friends. X

[Anna999 in reply to wombat3838]

I'm glad you have that support network to help you through it, having people to share all the happy memories with is a great comfort. You will always have those memories and your love for him will always be a part of you. I can't imagine how hard it must be for you hun, my thoughts are with you x

[wombat3838 in reply to Anna999]

Thank you Anna x

[Folliegirl]

Sending you love and strength for the days ahead ... I love the sound of the fun run, something to work towards and a fabulous way to honour your Dad ... Take care of yourself, one day at a time xx

[wombat3838 in reply to Folliegirl]

Thanks folliegirl you have all been so thoughtful and supportive I can't thank you enough x

[Babylegion]

I'm so sorry to hear of your fathers passing. I myself have been in a similar situation. 3yrs ago I watched my ex fiancé die in my arms. I know it's hard but turning to food never solves the problem. It's an underlying cause that won't go away without support and counselling. Have you thought about seeking help from either a counsellor or if your religious a priest?? Food only takes away the pain for a tiny amount of time, then later on you realise how your weight has crept up and feel more depressed. I know I did.... Six months after my ex fiancé died I tried to find comfort and dated someone else. It didn't work.... I ended up in a abusive relationship, in the end I ended up leaving him sept last yr realising that being so unhappy I turned to food. I got on the scales and my god... I weighed in at 15stone 4ibs, I was so ashamed... Now I'm 11stone 7ibs and getting back on track...

It's not easy coping with a death of a loved one especially a parent.... But seek some help do not turn to food my dear.

Take care and God bless you.

You are in my thoughts and prayers.

If you ever want to talk send me a message xxx

[wombat3838 in reply to Babylegion]

Thanks baby legion, I am so sorry to here you had such a bad time. Grief is a terrible the thing, leaves you looking for solace elsewhere not always in the right places. I'm lucky I have good friends and family around me if I need to talk and I have you guys too. Take care of yourself too and God bless you xxx

[Hidden]

Oh Wombat, i'm so sorry to hear your sad news. I realise what a hard time this must be for you.

The last thing you need right now is additional pressure regarding eating (and I am certainly not trying to put any on you) but you could perhaps turn it around and say that especially now you should be good to yourself. Eat but eat good stuff. Apart from anything else the sugar in the junk food will only make you more tired and on an emotional roller-coaster - and you will probably feel bad about eating it - you don't need any more negative emotions on top of your grief and shock. So eat clean foods that will actually fuel you for this difficult time and try to find comfort in other ways; baths, walks, time with friends, reading - whatever works for you.

Thinking of you x

[wombat3838 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you Maggs x

[Dozzle]

Condolences and hugs. Hope you are ok. Try to remember that exercise always lifts your mood, and if you can manage any it'll help with the grief too. The couch to 5k sounds like a good starting point for the fun run. Xx

[wombat3838 in reply to Dozzle]

Thank you dozzle

[alex7ra]

I am so sorry to hear this.

At times like this you need to look after your body to help you grieve.

I would suggest that you focus not on calorie counting but trying to eat wholesome food and making sure your body gets the nutrients it needs.

We are all here for you. Lots of hugs

[wombat3838 in reply to alex7ra]

Thank you Alex x

[eeek1110]

I am so sorry to hear your news. It is so hard losing a loved one and if turning to food is a comfort just choose the right things to eat. Sugar is going to give you a rush and then you are going to get a down, so turn to sugar again. That won't help you cope with your feelings. I thinking running will help you now, so do a bit more and that will make you feel you have more control of life at the moment. Take comfort from the support all around as that will help. x

[wombat3838 in reply to eeek1110]

Thank you eek

[Lynn62]

I lost my mam suddenly at Christmas and have put on 2stone since and I was already very overweight each day I think I will try to get through the day without bingeing but by the afternoon I am off again let's hope today I will do it good luck .

[Hidden in reply to Lynn62]

Hi Lynn. I'm really sorry to hear about your loss and its impact on you. You know that you can't go on like this and that your Mum wouldn't have wanted you to be feeling like this. Have you tried other ways of dealing with your grief? You sound as tho you really want to break out of this pattern that you have got into over the last few months....You could maybe speak to your Dr about talk therapy or find a local grief counsellor to help you acknowledge and deal with your feelings of loss.... I wish you all the best x

[wombat3838 in reply to Lynn62]

I am sorry to that Lynne it is really hard, I know we can make it through it all. Hugs xxx

[Bluehills]

Oh, you are in the early stages of a sudden bereavement - now is not the time to feel guilty if you don't count calories. I absolutely agree - concentrate on eating nutritious food, and get some gentle exercise, as that will be supportive for you in the grief process. Such a sudden bereavement will leave all sorts of emotions crashing through your mind, and your body will react to them. treat yourself as if you are convalescing after an illness, and take care x

[wombat3838 in reply to Bluehills]

Thank you bluehills I was already recovering from a stomach virus so I think I need to take extra care xx