Well it has finally got round to the date. I have been taking tablets to reduce the levels of Thyroid in my system so that this op will be possible. I am now at a safe limit so it is going ahead.
I am so concerned because I still feel so poorly and this is with my thyroid levels reduced (from being very high). The only thing that is keeping me going is the hope that after this I am going to start to feel better.
My throat is now sore and swallowing is becoming a real issue (I have a toxic growth on my thyroid) so I know it has to come out but I am so scared of the surgery and all that is involved and terrified that I will still not feel well and that I am suddenly going to have yo-yo weight problems and as I can't even remember what normal energy levels are like, I am scared I may never get back to that.
Everyone around me can see that whilst I was only diagnosed 3 months ago, I have been in decline for at least a couple of years (energy, anxious and irritable) and they all expect that by this time next week I will be a re-born person. I hope this is the case but the pressure to achieve this, when I realise that I am now about to enter into a phase of my life that I cannot just control myself, is almost overwhelming. I have masses of work to do (writing and editing) and a very tight deadline to meet a couple of weeks after the op and it is assumed I will be OK for this - I hope those around me are right!
I have had a migraine every day for the last 7 days and wonder if that is just stress or the medication. Usually I would get about one migraine a month. So this has put my work back even further as I simply have not been able to look at a screen.
Anyway I have just got my bag out of the cupboard and I am going to start to pack for hospital. Fingers crossed that I will be coping with it all by next weekend.
All the best to everyone