Do I have to stay single because I am hypothyroid


I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism about 8 months ago, although I suspect it has been undiagnosed for many, many years. About 2 yrs ago, I was so sick that I had to leave my job and haven't been able to work since. To be honest, I don't know when I will be able to work as I'm currently taking 50 mg eltroxin daily, its not working. I'm waiting to see an endocrinologist. I'm just wondering do I have to wait until I am working and my hypothyroidism is under control before I can look for a boyfriend. I am female and 39 yrs old. I would appreciate any advice. Thank you

17 Replies

Why do u think u have to wait to look for a boyfriend? The right one will come along. Just be your self.

Thanks for replying. I was thinking that because I was not well and also not working, guys wouldn't be interested in me

You may find that you need to reassess where you're likely to meet a chap. But perhaps looking in a different pool may turn up a fish you wouldn't have come across before ... Don't despair. I know it seems like a life sentence, but your health will improve. Become your own expert on thyroidism and take as much responsibility for your own health as you can. Who knows - you might meet Mr Right at a thyroid support group!

theres someone out there for everyone. Don't give up.

Thank you. Heres hoping :-)

This icky disease sucks the life right out of you but why were you not diagnosed two years ago? You are probably correct that you have been sliding down the thyroid pole for years. Auto immune diseases usually strike during times of hormonal change as it seems with you.

Rarely are people kept on such a low dose and it is detrimental not to keep on until you reach your optimal dose. I suspect you have not done that since you are still unwell. Do you have any of your blood test results. There are certain markers we aim for with TSH, FT4 and FT3. You are probably deficient in several vitamins that seem to go along with hypothyroidism and iron and ferritin need to be in certain ranges to effectively use your eltroxin.

If you know very little about your diagnosis, please start reading up so you can look healthy and more importantly be healthy.

...also have your thyroid anti-bodies tested. Anti-TPO and Anti-Tg.....ALSO

FERRITIN - Folate - B12 - Iron - VitD....

Please post your latest results with ranges so people can help....

Welcome to the forum! Today is the first day of the rest of your life! The next step is to post your last results with the ranges and tell us of any symptoms and you will get plenty of help and encouragement. Read what you can and don't worry if you find it confusing. We have all been there so ask away! If you haven't got your last results then ask at your surgery for a printout, if they just give you the figures to write down then ask for the ranges as these are important too-different labs work to different ranges.

Amen to that Silverfox!!

I hope you take the advice of silverfox7 - it's god advice and you have your whole life ahead of you. I'm sorry to hear that you feel unsure about whether you can start or find a new relationship because of your health but I understand it from the point of view that you may not have much energy and are clearly feeling unwell, so making the effort to create life with someone and start a new relationship could be daunting, but don't forget that there are other people who feel this way and would also like a partner - maybe there is someone for you who needs the compassion and patience of someone who understands what it's like to live with a chronic health condition?

Perhaps you could connect with some social groups or organisations that can offer you some volunteer work that's not too difficult or tiring and you can get to know more people. If you're feeling vulnerable it can be dangerous to seek out a boyfriend as there are unscrupulous people who target the vulnerable. Stay safe and connect with people who are known to your friends or who you meet as friends through like minded people and organisations in a safe environment and then get to know them well before you consider a relationship. Well, that's my advice as I've been one of those vulnerable people in the past and th result waning good but when I finally followed my own advice it led to me meeting the lovely man I'm married to, who had became a close friend. Try to do things t boost your self esteem and self confidence as these sound low. Some local community centres have great groups that meet to share skills such as sewing, knitting and so on and these offer good opportunities to broaden your horizons, feel good about yourself and spend time with people who can become part of your social and support network. I hope your health improves as you learn more about your condition and find better ways to manage it. I have seen an integrative physician with great success, but it's a little costly. You can learn lots on this forum that will help you get your energy back and return to optimal health. Hugs, Mx.

get your GP to test




Vit D3

usually with hypothyroid all of these are trashed

They MUST ALL BE halfway up in their ranges otherwise thyroxine /eltroxin simply will not work

get a copy of all your blood tests inc reference ranges and post them here so we can help furthur

The reason you are not improving is that your dose - 50mcg is a Starting dose and should have been increased. Too low a dose can keep you very unwell, even though your GP doesn't increase it due only to your TSH level. I bet you he/she has kept you on a dose which brought your TSH into the normal range then said you are on enough medication.

The doctors are completely and horribly unaware of the dangers to their patients when they don't give them an optimum of thyroid medication till the patients symptoms go and they feel well. It may not be done on levo alone but the addition of T3 can help.

First thing, get a print-out of the surgery of your latest blood tests for your thyroid gland.

If you've not had one for a while, ask GP and tell him you are feeling quite unwell, also ask for B12, Vit D, iron, ferritin and folate. Get a print-out with the ranges and post on a new question. Do NOT take levothyroxine before the blood test leaving 24 hours between levo and test and have it as early as possible.

You should take levo with 1 glass of water first thing and don't eat for at least an hour so food doesn't interfere. Also take levo with Vit C as it helps the conversion.

Read all of these questions and in particular the one dated November 28, 2003

How long have you been on 50 mcg? That is just a starter dose. Your doctor should have tested after six weeks on that dose and increased your eltroxin. It's time to ask him for another test!

On the day of the test, don't take your levo. Leave a gap of 24 hours between the last dose and the test, otherwise you will skew the results. On a normal day, take your eltroxin with a large glass of water, one hour before or two hours after eating. Don't take it with coffee, or tea, just water. That way, you will get maximum absorbtion. Because if you're not absorbing it properly, it isn't going to work, is it. lol

After the test, ask for a print-out of the results - it's your legal right to have them, and you need them for your own personal records, so that you know exactly what's been tested and where you are with it. If you don't understand the results, ask here, and someone will be able to explain.

i'm afraid you might have to put your foot down with your doctor. None of them have much idea what they're doing when it comes to thyroid, and need a firm guiding hand. You say you're waiting to see an endo. Do you already have your appt? The sad truth is, that endos don't have much idea, either - although he might know more than your gp! In the meantime, you have to learn as much as you can about your disease - read, read, read and ask questions, until you know more than your doctor does (which isn't difficult!). You've come to the right place here, where people can help you. Don't be afraid to ask.

And in the meantime, get those thyroid levels tested so that you can get an increase. And get the vits and mins tested too, as others have suggested. They are incredably important to your well-being, they all need to be optimised - and don't let your doctor tell you otherwise!

Hugs, Grey

People don't generally look for a boyfriend, it's better if you just click with someone and leave them come along naturally, regardless of your hypothyroidism. If someone really loves you and wants to be with you, they will be regardless of any health problems you have. Real love is unconditional xx

There is someone out there for everyone .. When the time comes it'll happen for you, just don't stress yourself about it right now!

Why would you think that hypothyroidism is going to spoil your chances in finding a partner. It is easy to manage and not a fatal disease, more a pain in the butt. I think what you need is to find a good GP and start from the beginning. With a list of all your symptoms go along to a GP and get a full set of bloods done. 50mcg is nothing regarding to dosage, and probably not enough for you. Did your GP not ask you to go back every 6 weeks for a new set of bloods to be taken until your bloods are OK. You are obviously not on the correct dose to be well and stay that way. Please take your health into your own hands, get it sorted, get yourself fit, get back to work and the rest of your life ie finding a partner etc., will follow, and as I say Thyroid problems will not make any difference to you having children if you so wish, as long as the situation is managed by a GP. You don,t say what your symptoms are and why they made you so sick you had to pack up your job.

Good Luck for the future get well and be happy X

Thank you all for your replies, I really appreciate the time taken to write them. I have having blood tests every 6 weeks since last june when I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism and each time my gp says all my levels are fine. I asked the health nurse in October to do a B12 test and my level was 114, so I received 4 injects of 1000mg B12 for 4 weeks. In November, I told my GP that I ould like to return to work, but that I can't function at all. I feel exhausted all the time, but am unable to sleep. I have anxiety, this was diagnosed at 23yrs. I feel nervous and on edge all the time, but this may have more to do with constant bullying by my sister who is also living at home. I have daily headaches and pains in my eyes. I feel nauseous and weak and am constantly crying. I can't stop worrying about everything all the time. I am on cymbalta for anxiety for the anxiety and panicattacks and stilnoct for sleep for many years. I have lost my eyebrows and my hair is growing white. I have read loads and recounted it all to my doctor especially about the adrenal glands, but she said it is not possible to treat adrenal fatigue which Im convinced I have from many years working in very stressful IT jobs. I also suffer from Rosacea, though this may be a seperate issue. I have completely changed my diet and do not eat any sugar or processed foods and eat a large amont of foods to support the thyroid daily. My 2 main fears of holding down a job are my memory and exhaustion. My memory has effectively been wiped out. Its so scary. My last job was as an IT project manager and it was in the last few months of that job that I knew something was seriously wrong with my health. I could barely function with the anxiety, tiredness, exhaustion and stress. I know that my managers expected too much of me and piled on the work because after a few months in that job, I found out that my colleagues joked to themselves of when I would have a nervous breakdown. I last visited my GP 2 weeks ago to get the results of a full blood test she suggested as she made an appointment for me to see and endocrinologist. I received a letter 6 weeks ago to say Im on a waiting list and am yet to receive an appointment. I told her I was worried about the crying, worrying and feeling sad and down all the time. She said my blood tests were fine, it was not the thyroid which she said was stable and suggested I see a counsellor. I will ask my GP's receptionist to print out my last blood test results tomorrow and post them here. I am sorry if this is a very rambling reply. Thank you for reading and also your very kind offers to interpret my blood test levels.

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