Help !: My life is becoming a full time... - IBS Network

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Help !


My life is becoming a full time nightmare predominated by my IBS.I have other issues but this seems to be taking over everything. Mostly not eating the right stuff (although I am eating some fodmap related stuff and generally healthy food) and I appreciate that is making things worse, but everything is making me more and more depressed. I also have bouts of eating nothing all day and then too much at night. I've taken a week or two off immodium and things do seem worse - constantly needing the toilet or worrying about it, I'm staying indoors most of the time and have lost all confidence..

I haven't had the test I need mentioned in a previous post due to depression. IBS seems to be taking over and depleting me. Any encouragement/motivation would be appreciated. I may sound like I am not doing enough- probably because I'm not- but I was highly attentive to all the things I should be doing before and it didn't seem to get me anywhere. We are all different, but if there are any particular foods you are eating that don't make you run to the toilet/bring on cramping, please let me know. If you want to tell me a joke equally welcome as I'm losing my sense of humour and that is one thing that I can normally count on.

31 Replies

Hi! Here's a joke :

What sits at the bottom of the sea and twitches?

A nervous wreck!

IBS is good at creating anxiety and depression. But it doesn't have to stay that way! Finding you have this conditions and struggling to manage is tough. When you say :

" I was highly attentive to all the things I should be doing before and it didn't seem to get me anywhere"

That's the thing with IBS, it's a despot, demanding a lot of work for little reward. But remember that this condition can take time to get better, but it will! There's gonna be a lot of trial and errors but you can do it! You are not defined by your illness. I'm sure you are a great person with lots of qualities and l IBS cannot remove that. It makes things more difficult, but you can find ways to make life easier for you.

First of all, get that medical side covered. Make sure that you do have IBS and not some other condition. I don't know what tests your doctor prescribed, but if you have to do a gastroscopy/colonoscopy you can ask to be sedated and if you're tired on that day, you might just sleep through the whole procedure (I did).

Knowing what you have exactly can relieve something anxiety (about cancer and other stuff). Then focus on little improvements you can make. Food is often the first step and you should pay attention as much as possible (try the low fodmap app on Google play and keep a food diary for a month). And if you're tempted by some dangerous food, thinking that you're already feeling like crap anyway, don't! Distract yourself, go for a walk, have a nice tea, but say no to food you know will make it worse. 5 minutes of pleasure is not worth 3 days of misery, right?

But also sleep! Try to get to sleep earlier, sleep repairs the body and soothes the mind. Sorry for this lengthy post! I hope it helps a bit! I can offer more advice on food supplements or ways to manage anxiety if you wish.

Take care of yourself :)

Thank you for your kind words and joke! I am reading this on a sleepless night which has as well as broken sleep become the norm. Food wise, I hear exactly what you are saying and I figured somebody would take me up on this. It involves perserverance and consistency.

I have to say, what with what is currently going on, sometimes 5 minutes of pleasure is worth a whole night of pain -good title for my memoirs! I will check out the app again. The test I need is currently neither the endoscopy or colonoscy. It's the one involving taking a pill and going back a week later for imaging. I keep forgetting the name but I will check again on here. C -seat or something like that. Thank you for the support- happy to hear more ..for me it's food in general that is becoming a problem, but I can definitely try harder.

I'm assuming you mean the SeHCAT test for Bile Acid Malabsorption. If you are having that test go ahead and get it done as soon as you can, it might be the answer to all your prayers.

It is and thank you, I need to sort it.

My brother had SeHCAT . It showed he was retaining next to no bile acid and the consultant said he didn't know how he wasn't spending his entire life on the loo. The treatment he is having is a bile acid sequestrant after every meal and it has completely transformed his life. I hope it does the same for you. If BAM is what you have, it is very treatable.

Thank you for the details - good to know.

Hi again!

I'm living in Belgium so it's morning here 10 am haha.

I don't know about this procedure but I hope it'll help you!

I've had sleeping issues for years and I noticed that IBS started after 2-3 years of constant sleep deprivation. I normally need about 8-9h of sleep but was getting 5 to 6 and when I have exams and I sleep less, it's almost guaranteed that I'm gonna get stomach pain, bloating, D and the like.

It's maybe not the best time to talk about the effects of sleep deprivation when you're having an insomnia. But when you don't sleep enough, you're more hungry and so more at risk to be attracted to dangerous food/your triggers. Btw you could make a list of these bad boys and check on the fodmap app if they have something in common. Or you can tell me which foods to check and I can look in my app if you don't want to try it for now.

Also sometimes it's not about the food you eat, but about the quantity eaten. For example, I can tolerate a few cherry tomatoes, but if I eat a handful, I'm gonna be sick for sure. The same with other things like sweets, chocolate, crisps, etc.

Anyway it's late where you are so let's not think too much about this for now. Could you try to do a bit of relaxation? Like a guided meditation or just taking deep breaths and imagining you're lying on the beach, you feel the sand on your skin, hear the sound of the waves...

Good luck, you're not alone in this!

Thank you. Can I ask which low fodmap app you use? And yes, insomnia makes it all worse.

I hear what you are saying re portion size, but currently I seem to spend most of the day not eating then feeling ravenous ongoing all out - I know, its all wrong.

When you are feeling ravenous, are you attracted to sugary foods especially?

Preparing your meals in advance can help. Sometimes you don't feel like cooking or waiting and will eat whatever is easy and quick, but if there's a delicious homemade meal already waiting for you, then it's easier to resist temptation. Alternatively, you can eat a little during the day even if you're not hungry (stress at work/school/... can make it impossible to eat, or you're just not feeling hungry till you come home) and have some "safe snacks" handy for when the hunger comes back?

All the stuff you talk about prep Understand and it makes sense, but I have very little motivation currently and yep attracted to carbs and sugary food at times when low in mood. Tonight I made myself a pretty damn tasty dinner and had the worst time afterwards. It was possibly to rich and certain ingredients may have set it off. It was prawns (cooked from raw) and gluten free pasta with a sauce which included a little bit of coconut milk, sun dried tomato pesto and courgettes. Topped with some fake parmesan.

(appreciate seafood and rich prawns probably wasn't a good idea either, but fairly healthy compared to what I could have had)


My doctor told me not to eat prawns and the like because they feed on stuff that's not really great for us. I'm not really sure about that but I don't eat them anymore. What I do know is that gluten free pasta made from starch (maize/corn, potato) are difficult to digest. The rice flour option might be easier for you. Do you take enzymes supplements? That could really help you! Try to reduce you sugar intake if you can (easier said than done ^^).

I might be wrong, but maybe you have a little bit of Candida (a yeast) that's messing with you gut?

If you are very attracted to sugar, have 'brain fog' and fatigue and stomach troubles+ joint pain, it might be it. Your doctor can test for that or you can see a dietician to just talk about your difficulties concerning food.

Good luck :)

Thank you. Re the pasta, I hardly eat it and I'm not enjoying it so good to know ! Will look into candida issue. I'm sure it was mentioned many moons ago by a nutritionist.

Alright! Keep us posted :)

Hello !

How are you today?

I use the Monash university app, it's very useful (gives portion size and type of fodmap) and you can log your symptoms and what you eat in the diary.

Ok, thank you.

Hi Houseofpain,

I do hope you get sorted out very soon and wish you well, here is something I saw on Facebook.

Just for a laugh to brighten your day.

This was on a fb group I’m a member of.

A friend went to Beijing recently and was given this brochure by the hotel. It is precious.

She is keeping it and reading it whenever she feels depressed.

Obviously, it has been translated directly, word for word from Mandarin to English.
Getting There: 
Our representative will make you wait at the airport. The bus to the hotel runs along the lake shore. Soon you will feel pleasure in passing water. You will know that you are getting near the hotel, because you will go round the bend. The manager will await you in the entrance hall. He always tries to have intercourse with all new guests.
The Hotel: 
This is a family hotel, so children are very welcome. We of course are always pleased to accept adultery. Highly skilled nurses are available in the evenings to put down your children. Guests are invited to conjugate in the bar and expose themselves to others. But please note that ladies are not allowed to have babies in the bar. We organize social games, so no guest is ever left alone to play with them self.
The Restaurant: 
Our menus have been carefully chosen to be ordinary and unexciting. At dinner, our quartet will circulate from table to table, and fiddle with you.
Your Room: 
Every room has excellent facilities for your private parts. In winter, every room is on heat. Each room has a balcony offering views of outstanding obscenity! .. You will not be disturbed by traffic noise, since the road between the hotel and the lake is used only by pederasts.
Your bed has been made in accordance with local tradition. If you have any other ideas please ring for the chambermaid. Please take advantage of her. She will be very pleased to squash your shirts, blouses and underwear. If asked, she will also squeeze your trousers.
Above All: 
When you leave us at the end of your holiday, you will have no hope. You will struggle to forget it.

in reply to Moijoy

Very funny, I must print that out!!😂

So, so sorry for you. I've been there and got the t-shirt believe me. I think it's a case of trying different ways of managing your food. We're not all the same but do use imodium, it's a life saver. I've had awful episodes outside the home! But do you know what I can't help it and neither can you. Go out with wet wipes and change of underwear. If you drive, keep set of clothes in car. Mine started with a dodgy beef burger. I'm now retired so at least have some respite to having to rush out door in morning. Good luck my dear, you are definitely not alone. Ask doctor for any recommendations on tablets. Take care.

Thank you for your kind words.

Oh it sounds just like me.. also it seems everyone else on here.. be reassured it’s probably nothing serious but first you need to gain some confidence back physically as I’m sure like me you just don’t trust your bum not letting you down !

I’ve had it for many many years and I’m currently for the first time actually addressing my diet.. the Fodmap is going well for me, it’s not easy to follow but I urge you to treat it as a new project and go with it, stick to it !

I have had poo tests and blood tests and all seems ok, I have never had anything more invasive as I am certain it’s mostly anxiety and maybe my diet

Good luck

It’s a pain in the arse but you will get in top of it xx

in reply to Shvuntz

Haha. Thank you for the pep chat.

Tell your doctor to prescribe you one of these drugs: Welchol, Colestipol, or Questran. All 3 are miracle drugs in my humble opinion. I take 4 tablets a day of Colestipol and I now have my life back after years of chronic diarrhea....

Not sure if my previous response to you went through, but thank you. I am quite a lot of meds for things in general and I feel really conscious of added more to the equation. It is really difficult as some conflict with each other. I should be doing something more holistic really, but I appreciate your words and will look into it.

Also just to say already have stuff such as peppermint oil, buscopan, ammonium and lansaprazole- the lansoprazole I haven't taken regularly which refutes the point but I'm going to start trying on that front.

Hopefully, these will help you, but I have found that nothing holistic ever help with mine. Good luck and keep me posted!

House of pain

I have been thru hell and back with IBS. I simply refuse to give up foods or lifestyle. I won’t cater to this and let it run my life. I got to a very low place for a while myself and decided I was done! Totally done. I decided I could stay home, dwell on it, dread it, fear it and have no life or live with it, understand it is part of me, not fear it and definitely not worry about it anymore! I go out, I don’t just sit and think about it anymore, I just knew that staying home was not going to make it right. If I felt safe at home and had a good day I just knew it was more in my head than my gut. I was right. Anxiety, panic and stress were causing most of my IBS. I thought about it from the time my feet hit the floor in the morning, constant what if? I realized that most of my gut trouble was right after breakfast and about a week to a week and a half each month but those times were what threw my anxiety into a tizzy.

I am in menopause so I didn’t think it was “period” related but after a full year of keeping track I was surprised that the cramping, explosive bouts of diarrhea, nausea, pain, fatigue, all of it was about the same time each month. Just as if I were in my PMS time? I haven’t had a “period” in six years but this was spot on (no pun intended) every single month. After realizing that I could accept I’m not sick or dying I could handle this and not stress about it. It’s just another day. I put on a depends (in case) and head out to get on with my wonderful life!!! Screw it, I’m me, this is my life and I’m living it with or without anyone’s judgement, who arevthey anyway?

I appreciate your fire and strength. I'm normally pretty fiery myself, but I am sitting here having had a day of running to the toilet, whether I eat or don't eat. My stomach makes me feel awful and the cramps and pain I am in would no way make me want to enjoy the day/night. I have other problems so it's not just the IBS I have to deal with, but currently it is dominating everything and I know doing the wrong things will make it worse, but I at this moment, I feel doing the right things won't make it any better. Have taken some buscopan, peppermint oil, probiotics and will probably take imodium if I need to, having taken time out from it.....

Hello Houseofpain!

How are you doing today? :)

Not too good but thank you for asking. I'm blaming myself for everything as I have eaten all the wrong stuff having spent most of the day not eating anything (aside from a small brekkie) to the point I felt faint. I don't know if many people in the group have this problem but I tend to wait up have a dodgy stomach, have little to eat and spend the whole day waiting till my blood sugar levels probably drop and I feel nauseous on top of it and then eat too much. I feel so depleted, dehydrated and hurting. how are you ?! Hope you are doing the right things and not in pain.

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