Hi, just thought I would share something that happened yesterday which seems to happen to me a lot when I try to interact with anyone.
My husband and I keep in touch with his mother's best friend from childhood. She is in her mid 80's. My husbands mother died about 3 years ago. We chatted for a while and then she did what she always does, asks if we can go for a visit. She lives about an hour and a half away by car. We always say, it is really difficult for me to get that far and over an hour is pushing it. We try to explain that I never know what I am going to feel like from one minute to another and it's just impossible to make arrangements with anyone. When we go anywhere as a couple, it is always spur of the moment and we never know if we will make it or have to turn back again and go home. I am unable to go to the toilet away from home as I can be stuck in there for hours at a time and just could not do that in a friends or public toilet. If I feel like I need to go when out, it is easier (for me, the way I feel) to hold it till I get home, if that is possible, or just continue with our outing and hope it gets a bit better with time (sometimes I does, sometimes it doesn't).
Also people say they understand and it doesn't matter if you can't make it, until that happens and then they get ratty about it, or want you to make arrangements for another day, when you have put all your effort into trying to do it that day. Or, if you do use their toilet (as has happened to me in the past when I stayed with a friend many years ago), as soon as you get in there they start knocking on the door asking how much longer you will be.
The other problem with this lady is she always wants to feed you, and when I go out I often go all day without eating anything because I am too scared but people will just not leave you alone to let you do what you know is the best thing for you.
Does everyone else experience this too?
Is it no wonder that we do not have any friends
Maureen.