Log in
IBS Network
23,172 members7,809 posts

Stressed out mum

Hi. I'm looking for a bit of advice. My little girl is 13 months old. She's my second so I'm genuinely not a hysterical mum. She's been breastfed since birth and started weaning at 6.5 months. She has ALWAYS been a screamer. She arches her back, brings her knees up and thrashes around- this only stops when she has passed wind. She has high pitched pain screaming fits, difficulty passing wind but is rarely constipated. She is a petite/ slim baby but often has a hard pot belly that goes after she screams and manages to pass wind. It's like she has cramps after every meal/ breastfeed. I am utterly exhausted and worn out from the screaming- I can count on three fingers the amount of times she has slept longer than 3 hours. My eldest daughter has essentially lost me to her sister as she needs constant placating/ stomach massage. She hasn't got reflux.

Everytime I go to the doctors I feel utterly fobbed off with "it's a phase" or spoken to like I am a hysterical mother. I'm not- my baby screams for hours every day and is in obvious pain but she does the whole "oh this is a new place" and quietens down when she's at the doctors (typical child....). I'm genuinely at my wits end and am now on anti-depressants as I am failing my baby and can't cope.

Her dad suffers with IBS- can you be born with it? Is it likely or even possible that this could be IBS? She has definite trigger foods that we try and avoid but lately it's everything. It's heartbreaking. She has such lovely brief sunny periods and then she's overtaken by the screaming cramping fits again. I don't know what to do. Does anyone have any experience like this with a child so young?

Thanks for reading!

8 Replies

You might want to check if there are pediatric gastroenterologists. I am in the US & there are such doctors here.


Sounds like it could be a gluten intolerance... try cutting it out of her diet and see if it helps


Have you tried taking her to an osteopath?


Hey there Littlescousemouse,

I'm so sorry to hear your troubles... colic can be horrid for everyone. You have my deepest sympathies my darling x.

It is very common in young babies, as their digestive systems get used to dealing with proteins and sugars in milk, but they usually grow out of it by 6-9 months. If you're little girl is still having problems after weening, then it may be possible she has a sensitivity to gluten and wheat, or indeed lactose or any number of other ingredients in her food.

I'm guessing from your username that you're up north? (I used to live in Southport).... Alder Hey has a really good paediatric gastro unit that looks after all sorts of digestive conditions in children. I would really push the GP for a referral to the unit to look for reasons why the trapped wind is such a problem for her... they can also check for food intolerances, celiacs or colitis and will be able to give you advise on how to help her.

Don't get fobbed off my darling.. get a second, third or even fourth opinion! As a mum, you know your baby better than anyone else... and if you are sure there's a problem, don't rest until you are happy with the answers you're getting!

Talk to the health visitor too... they may be able to refer you without the GP.

Wishing you much love and a quick resolution for you all.

K xx


Hi I'm 75 now, from the time i was born until about 2 i am told I cried the whole time. I was bottlefed and i believe it was milk that caused the problem. After 2 i was ok until 70 when i had an injection for sea-sickness, after that thr bloating, pain and diarrhea started. There is a very new blood test called ibschek available now. You should insist on this. If it is negative that would be great. Other than that it may be that the baby's insides are growing and perhaps will get better. Have you got anyone who can look after the baby to give you a break, or could she go to a nursery for a short time? Good luck i know what anxiety a crying baby can cause.


Hello there,

Although not identical, I had a very difficult time with my second daughter too. She too was a screamer and it took a great deal out of all of us. So I know just how awful you are feeling, and my heart goes out to you.

I can see why you are trying to link what she is eating with her digestion, as this seems logical. And you are right to get this checked out by a specialist if you feel that is what is going on.

In my daughter's case it was coming from teething. Although she wasn't showing any external signs of teeth coming through, the teething was creating a lot of saliva. She was swallowing it and this was messing with the pH in her stomach making her nauseous. She had problems eating and digesting anything, and sleeping. This went on for over 2 years and we were walking around like zombies.

A small percentage of children are very sensitive to teeting, so don't expect any doctor or dentist to pick up on it (I worked this out when my daughter was 9 and the link became clearer).

If you think this may be an issue, I would suggest you go and see a homeopath. They will probably prescribe arnica montana, chamomilla, nux vomica and kreosotum.

My daughter is now 11, and we recently went through this again with teeth coming through. She still takes this homeopathic treatment, but salt and vinegar crisps help her the most now. Salt helps mop up the saliva - but obviously you can't use this for young children. I'm just mentioning it in case you need that some day.

To reassure you, we did survive as a family. I felt I was abandoning her bigger sister too. Luckily she does not even remember any of that and doesn't feel deprived in any way.

Know that you are doing your best in a really challenging situation. You may not feel that way, but you are being an excellent Mum.

Hope this help you,



I am so sorry to hear that she and you are having such a rough time.

Have you had her checked for Colic? I would insist on a battery of non invasive tests. Simple blood tests can detect an array of possibilities by elevated white blood cells. Doctors are quick to shuttle you along and dismiss the obvious but as a parent you know your child. I am rather pointed with my doctor and she knows I expect some investigation on her part. No one wakes up and says I think Ill go to the doctor for fun today. She could have a twisted bowel or any number of abnormalities? They should do an abdominal ultrasound and X-ray at the very least and I would demand it!

Please keep me posted and the very best of luck to you! And yes, it CAN be genetic, maybe they can do the ibschek on her too! Just a blood test

1 like

Also check if it is lactose intolerance.


You may also like...