giving up

[sweet_lily]

im giving up, from loving happy i get to depressed and giving up as theres bo help ! had appendix surgery 12.2020, 6 months later pain and lump like hernia after appendix removed. january 2022 pain was so bad i went to a&e then been signed off from work ( next momth im back to work ) and then many trips to hospital been treated with morphine codeine and many more pain killers , stop taking them as first there no help from painkillers apart they making me feel addicted and not myself . 9 months later im on antidepressants, cant cope with this pain , right side of my body kidney hurts so much , pain is getting worse sometimes im feeling that bad i would cut this 7 cm lump on my own . Dont know what to do , never had issues with it 3 healthy kids no miscarriage and then since that appendix living in pain as much as im trying feeling like giving up , theres no help and noone understand how much it hurts ( im not drama queen after c-section 8 h went to take a shower on my own , ) but now pain is so bad even moving. What to do 😢😭😭