I asked my husband to come in the bathroom with me this morning while I showered and dressed. Feeling unsteady on my feet, scared of falling. I've not needed this much hands on care and don't like feeling so dependent! Don't know if my unsteadiness is from pain meds, neuropathy, brain mets and rads...... I know I'm fortunate to have a husband who I know is here for me, but I hate needing him for such basic self care! (at least I can still use the toilet on my own, lol!) I'm hoping this is temporary!
Did I let you know that we both tested positive for covid over the weekend, just when we thought we could test one more time and stop worrying about our exposure...... neither one of us have much in the way of symptoms. All this is overwhelming me... I want to crawl under the covers and cry myself to sleep, lol, a crappy day. Oh, one of our daughters left yesterday to drive 1500 miles to a warmer part of the country where she found a job and an apartment. I am going to miss her alot. She is very thin and hates cold winters and has wanted to move south for a long time, so I'm happy for her, but at the same time am feeling this as one more loss. It's kind of ironic because I moved a long way from home for college and never moved back "home."
Good to be able to vent here! I'm going to have some chicken soup (homemade) and possibly take a nap....
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PJBinMI
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I’m so sorry you’re having a bad time right now. I’m hoping the meds are making you unsteady, but I know you’ll be contacting your dr. To get checked out. None of us like asking for help but sometimes it’s ok, I think it’s that feeling of losing independence and thinking your unable to manage things. Having help and a supportive husband is a wonderful thing. The stress of your daughter moving is very hard. Maybe it’s a combination of everything going on that your body is in a funk. COVID, meds, daughter, but I would still reach out to your doctor to get a peace of mind. I hope you’ll feel mentally and physically better soon. Seems like when it rains it pours on us. But there is sunshine out there keep the hope for better days ahead.
Sometimes our mental fear blocks us. I had been sure for months that I could no longer the 15 minute to the store and back so I had been paying car service to bring me there, wait and bring me home bc I do not drive and have no friends in Brooklyn to assist.
The other day I had had to get milk and I did not have enough money for car service (I do not even know how to use Uber) so I thought just do not think about it and see how far I can go.
I went to the store and back and only sat down once on the benches (Ocean Parkway is lined with benches) and I was shocked that I was able to do so. I think mentally I got myself so worked up, and I am alone, that I believed I could no longer do it
The other day I had to get something off a top shelf in my kitchen and I had to stand (and I am overweight) on a chair that certainly was not made to hold my weight. I was scared but I needed it and I was able to get it. Although I am sure that chair will break soon.
Some days are worse than others and sometimes (at least with me), I had it so bad in my mind that I believed I could no longer travel alone but I can. I let my mind take over.
So maybe it is just a temporary thing. I have no help at all but still can take a shower, etc. Thank God. I hope going ahead that it just may be your fear getting the best of you.
That's great that you have been able to overcome your fears/misgivings! I think you are right. Sometimes it's a matter of giving ourselves time to rest.
But please, get yourself a step stool (or a stronger chair) for your kitchen cupboards!
Glad you are working at it and doing what you fear but please get yourself a step stool. I had to get a low one to help me get on my bed. Anything to make life a little easier my friend. Good luck
Wow, stress overload! Hope it’s just the combination of events that has you down. I know loss of independence is my greatest fear. Keep up the good fight and feel better soon. Manon
So sorry to hear your feeling down its a lot to deal with, catching Covid on top of your MBC and then your daughter leaving on her new adventures. We all need a little support and help sometimes and im sure your husband doesn't mind one bit.Chicken soup and a good rest and sleep is perfect and im sure you will be feeling better in soon. Sending love, positive vibes and hugs your way xx 🤗🤗
mom had covid early this year and she was not vaccinated (unfortunately she was scared of the vaccine😌 ) oncologist order to go to ER stop Ibrance due to her very low white count. He ordered cbc, ekg, chemistry lab. give medication Sotrovimab IV only 1 dose- its still within 5-7 days window criteria from the 1st symptoms date. monitor etc.
Hang in there. One day at a time cry if needed tears are medicine too, it helps me with my fear when mom 4 yrs. ago and my sis. 2 yrs. ago diagnosed with advanced MBC.
COVID can do all sorts of annoying things--I was pretty asymptomatic when I had it, but tired and a bit dizzy for a few weeks after I was officially "over it". I mean, it COULD be cancer, but it could also be something boring. I also get really dizzy when I'm dehydrated--I have to drink so much water in this heat. Am sure you know that though as you are a long-timer.... Glad to hear you are asking for help though.
And on your daughter leaving--it's so hard even when they're adults. No wonder you're a bit blue...
So sorry to hear you are not feeling well. Hope it is temporary. I the meantime, you are on the right path with the chicken soup and the rest. Ask your oncologist if you might take something to protect your stomach. I take Pantaprazole very day. I know we don't want to take extra meds but with the strong meds we are taking for Cancer it makes sense to protect yourself. Anyhow it works for me.Also, I don't keep anything on the top shelf anymore. I know at 5 ft. 3 in. it is too difficult to reach. Makes the lower shelves fuller but never the less.
Thanks for telling me. That would explain why the Ibrance didn't work. At least there was a slight increase in the disease so they dropped it. I am on the lowest dose of Verzenio now and it is working. Maybe another stomach med would work.
At the beginning I too was on Ibrance. I could not handle the week off so I was taken off it after three months. Then she prescribed Verzenio. I could not handle the 150 mg. dose or the 100 mg. dose. I could not leave the house (and I do not drive) bc of the severe diarrhea. She then lowered me to the lowest dose possible 50 mg. I was on Verzenio and the falsodex injections for about three and a half years.
I felt normal for the most part, not as tired, not heavily medicated, no bm issues. She had to stop that treatment as of June of this year bc it spread to my liver (waiting for my CT scan yesterday to be put on my patient portal bc it appears that these new meds are not working).
I cried when I found out I could no longer continue that treatment. It made me feel normal. I hope you have an even longer time with that treatment than I did. As my onco told me "I had a good run with it."
So sorry you're feeling miserable. Hang on in there! Drink plenty, look after yourself and I hope the Covid is soon passed. Have you got the option of the anti-viral infusion? Needs to be within the first five days.
Have a lovely nap and I'm sure your chicken soup was delicious!
I am so sorry you are going through all of this. It is a lot to deal with. I hope you find out what is making you feel unsteady. Although you are not having a lot of symptoms with your Covid it could be related to that. Having your daughter move so far away is also difficult. I hope she will be happy with her move and her new job and that you will have the chance to go and see her. Hoping the chicken soup and a good rest will help you feel better. Take care. Sending hugs.
I don’t know what to say only that this is really really hard. and I’m going through a similar thing at the moment but without a husband/ partner or daughter. And not that I’m wanting to rub that in at all. Our journeys are all relative! Yours is just important as mine is... etc. We are all travelling our own road... And yours my friend is hard at present. Very hard.Don't forget. Having covid could be putting you off kilter also. But try to just feel the feelings and don't deny yourself that.
Just know you're not alone and we all care about you.
Breathe and relax. Your body is working hard. You are fighting like a warrior. Time for others to help you out. I hate that feeling as well. Never asked others for help but now it’s necessary. Peace. We are all in this together
Thank you for all the wonderful replies! More "normal" me would be writing to each of you individually, but I'm just not up to it today. Not being comfortable standing and walking is really hard. Gotta push myself to move more.... sigh. I hate cancer and what it does to us! So glad you are all here and understand
Chicken soup and a nap sounds great! Some days we just have to let others do for us and do what we need to get through the day. Knowing your daughter is living her life should help you with her absence. She’s finally going to be warm!
Hoping you feel better soon. I had a crappy day Monday and Tuesday, had to leave work coz I got dizzy Monday afternoon. I am better today and back at work which if I was smart I should have stayed home, LOL. Hope for better days ahead, glad hubby is in the picture to help you. One of my daughters is my main caretaker and I hate to be a burden but I am glad she is home.
I'm so sorry to hear that you are having such a hard time right now. Life can be challenging, and having Metz just makes it that much harder. You are not alone in your feelings, I'm sure that most of us in the group have felt very similar feelings. Sometimes, it helps me to feel stronger knowing others have gone through tough moments and that they pass, we are not alone in what we are going through. I hope that you get past feeling unsteady, get your autonomy back and that you and your daughter get to have many beautiful visits and time together to enjoy each other's company and love. I'm glad to hear that your and your husband's bout with Covid is mild, and a good note is you will both have more antibodies so as not to get it again. Maybe listening to some of your favorite music, or having something delicious to eat, or getting out in some sunshine, or visiting a good friend can help you feel more comfort and better? These are the things I fall back on when I've had more than I can handle in life and when I'm not feeling well. Take good care, and I hope you feel better soon!
I can't add anything that the wonderful ladies on this forum have not already suggested. But I wanted to send you a hug and let you know that we have all been through similar times. Times when a bunch of big things happen all at once when I'm already tired and mentally stressed. I also wanted to assure that little by little it will get better.
So sorry that you got Covid. With everything else you have going on, that’s the last thing you need. I’m happy to hear that you and your husband have mild symptoms. I recently just got over Covid. The only symptom that lingered was that I felt dizzy, shaky, felt like my knees were gonna give out from under me. It took about 2 1/2 to 3 weeks for me to feel steady again. Hoping that your unsteady feeling passes soon. It sucks when the kiddos move away- that is extremely hard to deal with. I hope you feel better real soon! Take care and be kind and gentle to yourself.
To add to my other reply, don't feel bad about asking for help. I know it is difficult but the alternative of falling and really doing some damage is by far the best result. Hate this Cancer sometimes.
It's good to read that some of you have felt unsteady on your feet with Covid! It's been the hardest symptom/side effect I've had since getting this MBC diagnosis! I'm kinda scared to be home alone right now and I really hate feeling like this! I forget how to say what I;m trying to say now, but I have gotten way past being scared of dying and the dying process. (helps alot to be a person of faith and to not think death means the end....) I've been with alot of people as they die and that's reassuring to me. Painmeds and love......
I resally appreciate all the cdaring notes left here for me--it means alot.
I actually collapsed and fell unconscious one day.Please allow your husband to help when feeling unsteady.Thank God my husband was with me when I passed out to observe what was happening.It had been a very stressful day as my husband had had a migraine seizure and been to the ER.We were also supposed to meet up with family for a cruise vacation within hours!
I had gotten a "Hurricane" for my unsteadiness while on the cruise and it works great You might get one to feel more independent ❤️
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