I have been reading your posts on here for several months and it has helped me alot. About 6 months ago I was diagnosed with secondary metastases breast cancer it is in 3 places on my spine and in my sternum. On Friday last week I had a MRI scan of the whole spine and should get results this afternoon to see if it has spread as I have pain at the top of the spine which has been there for the last 6 weeks I am on ibrance and letrozole . The reason for my post is I seem to have cut off all my closest friends I just can't face them they have tried so hard to keep in touch but it's like a mental block I don't want to see anyone except my family I don't go out as I find it so hard to walk (I am fairly big and my knees kill me) it's a bad circle as when on my own I worry about how long I have to live it's never out of my mind! I do work but have recently gone part time as I would find myself falling asleep at my desk on top of this I need to have desonab injections but my consultant has said that all my teeth have to come out first because of the bones........
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Dyerbev60
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Hi you have so much going on with yourself that you want to cut off the world until it goes away, it seems. Sometimes people don’t say or do anything , what you think is the right thing or you just don’t want to hear them. But try just saying hello to someone you don’t know at all. It heals my mind for that short time hopefully it will help you too. Pray for all the best for you
I can’t advise you on what your consultant said about losing your teeth, but never heard of that. Maybe some of the ladies with personal experience with desonab can help. I’d clarify that and get another professional opinion. In regards to you isolating yourself, totally understandable. You are newly diagnosed and overwhelmed. This is probably the first time you’ve had to deal with a diagnosis that changes almost everything about how you see yourself, your outlook for the future, your daily life. Your place in and relationship with the universe changes radically. It is more than a person can handle alone. Youre scared and possibly depressed. Just know what you are feeling is totally normal. It will get better, but living with this is a work in progress. I go to therapy and am on a small dose of an antidepressant. You might consider the same. It really helps to vent to someone not involved in your life. Loved ones want desperately to help, but they often don’t know what to say or do. I also don’t want to overload mine with my angst, although inevitably I do, especially my husband☹️ Although you want to hide from the world, I’d encourage you to start with one friend and have a good long talk, tears permitted. Isolating yourself will make all your fears and anguish worse. Force yourself to go outside, if only to sit. As you get in to the routine of doctor visits and tests, make time also to do things that have nothing to do with cancer. Get your nails done (a good activity with a friend.). Go to an upbeat movie. You may not be able to do simple yoga yet. there is gentle yoga and chair yoga, how about meditation ? If you practice a faith, how about a visit with your clergy member. As you hit your daily stride, consider planning a vacation. Having something to look forward to is very uplifting and is a great preoccupation. To sum up, do not isolate yourself even though you want to hide under the covers and not come out. Call a friend. Get help dealing with the emotional side of this. Sometimes things are bigger than we are and we need help. Do something fun that has nothing to do with cancer. Get a friend to go along. Is it possible to work part time ? If you are able to work, it is great therapy as you can’t sit there and mull over Mbc. Read
My early posts. I was a hot mess. Sometimes I still am, but it doesn’t last. Your reactions are all too normal. Don’t sit with all this by yourself Get help, reach out to good friends. All the best and keep posting this is an amazing website with women who walk your walk. 💕
Hello. I am very sorry you are going through a lot. I understand what you are going through because I find myself shunning close friends sometimes. I think it’s because there’s sometimes a feeling of envy why we are the way we are while they are going through life normally. Are you a member of a religious group? Maybe a visit from a Pastor , Priest or Deacon would do you good? Anyway, we in this forum are here for you.
I totally understand this and there’s no shame in avoiding people...I do it quite a lot as I can’t be bothered with small talk or putting on a brave face
I don’t mind being on my own but not stuck in the house all day
For example today I had an appointment to have my nails done so I caught a bus there and walked back...I also stopped at a deli and had a sandwich and a coffee...didn’t bother me not being with anyone else
I’m in pain a lot so I’ve joined a health club which has an outdoor swimming pool so I go there on my own and as the pool is heated then I swim in cold weather as well...went the other day and it was sunny and swimming outside was lovely...looking at the birds and planes flying over...could almost imagine I was on holiday ( well almost!!)
So by doing these things I’m getting out the house and getting some exercise without putting up with other people when I’m not in the mood
I do socialise as well with chums especially when I’m able to ride my horse as most of my friends are from the stables...if there’s nobody around I talk to my horse...he understands and always agrees with me!!
I’m not trying to make this sound easy...it’s bloody difficult to make yourself get out and about but you don’t have to rely on company or prove anything just do it
If your knees are bad...swimming will really help....when my pain is especially bad....the relief of swimming in a warm pool is wonderful
All the best
Barb
Xx
My dear sister warrior — you have many symptoms of depression. In today’s pharmaceutical age, there should be no reason for a doctor to fail to discuss anti- depressants and cognitive therapy. I take celexa and occasionally CBD oil when I’m anxious. Have you explored any of these options?
🙋♀️ I have bone mets! Started off with about 14 of them...people with bone mets live a very long time...U need to plan on being here 5-10...So plan the vacation, join the gym and eat the cake! ❤️🎉
Dyerbev60: Thank you for sharing! I agree with all the responses. Praying you take baby steps to follow the suggestions given. With God all things are possible. Praying God will help you. Here is a virtual long hug 🤗 🤗 🤗...
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Stopping Ibrance for the time being
A Sweet and Precious Time
Support by drug? I want to stay here, I don’t feel so afraid with this group.
Decision time!
Surgery and going off Ibrance and letrozole for a period of time after surgery
