I'm new here

Hi everyone! I just joined today and have read and responded to some great posts. Everything I've read has been informative, interesting, and most importantly pleasant.

I know this has been discussed, maybe not on it's own, or just not in a while.

I'm one of those guys who has has an issue with body image. One or two things I need to work on motivation, like losing weight, I find it tough to motivate myself and don't have anyone to help with.

The other I can't control is size of my penis. I'm curious to other men's opinions, experience, etc. I'm obsessed with it to the point of depression. Obviously you can guess I'm not very well endowed. I'm 48 and am married, but reject my wife's opinion that "it's fine". She's the only woman I've ever been with.

Thank you!!!

14 Replies

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  • I don't have a magic answer to make you feel better. The world is full of guys who don't like their bodies or their dicks or who think they're not smart enough or good enough at something. I used to know someone who was embarassed because he thought his dick was too big (? yeah, I know.....so many people would love to have the problem!). Nobody (except maybe Donald Trump, and look at that mess) thinks they're perfect, and a helluva people are unhappy about their shortcomings. Other people may have even more "wrong" with them and yet they're relatively content. So the issue is not what you look like, it's how you feel about it. I'm not a psychologist or counselor or anything, and I've been plenty unhappy with myself at various periods of my life. I still get down on myself sometimes and have lots of regrets, but somehow things are better than they used to be. Because I'm alive and relatively healthy after a lot of problems? I dunno! But it is possible to feel better about yourself.....

  • Thank you! My problem is how do I feel better about myself? I've been married for 12 years, I know she's been with much bigger men than me, she's fine with it, at least that's what she says. The problem I have with that, at the moment, is she hasn't wanted sex or play or anything like that for some time now. Even the few weekends where our son will spend the night at my Mom's. That creates more anxiety and also makes me thinks she's getting tired of it because it can't satisfy her.

  • Her opinion that "it's fine" is very good .

    Also She's the only woman you've ever been with is also very good .

  • Thank you, please see my reply above, still have worries.

    Yeah, I'm kind of glad I've only been with one woman, but I'm at the point where I regret a lot, and one of those is at least experiencing another woman.

    Even more, I've found myself thinking that I'd want to be with a man to experience that as well. Has anyone else here had those thoughts?

  • You should be able to bring this up with your wife. Maybe look for a single or a couple that might be interested in swinging. Dick size really doesn't matter (from what I've heard) it's how you use it. Very few people have a "big dick". Mostly porn will lead you to think you're small. Everyone in porn is hung. But anyway, i really think you guys should have a couple glasses of wine (to be more forward) and talk about how you guys can make things more interesting. I hear swinging is a blast

  • It's funny you mention that. I have suggested bringing another woman into the bedroom, but she's totally against it. I then said maybe a couple, no go for that either.

  • I think you can engage in more foreplay . After 12 years interest reduces.Don't worry.You will be ok.May be you have to insert finger or go for oral. Good Luck

  • Thank you!

  • I think size is not that important, occasionally we use what I call a padded condom. This gives me an extra 2" and more girth. My Wife obviously enjoys this but never asks, it is always my suggestion. I would follow diptasu's suggestion and try different methods of foreplay. May-be even try foreplay that does not lead to full sex. Kiss caress cuddle sleep. Save the sex for when you really both want it.

  • I'll have to consider that. I know this may be inappropriate to ask or say here, but I'd be interested in hearing your normal size. Whenever I see a picture of some other guy that says they are small, their definition and my reality are two different things. I'd be happy to have what they do.

    Where can you find the "padded condom"?

    Have you discussed your size with your wife? If she's had partners before you, did you ever ask how you compare in size?

  • When erect I am 6" from base of shaft at stomach to tip. Bear in mind most photo's of guys showing their penis would be designed to do just that and use angles to make him look bigger.

    The condom I bought was from an on-line sex toy retailer and cost about £8. Various options are available, I find this one quite easy to use, it is about 3mm thick latex and has a solid end of about 2". I simply roll it up and roll it down, you do not have to be fully erect to use and with some practice can be put on quickly. The first time we used it I did not show her first. I just asked would she like for us to try a padded condom. And yes she enjoyed it, and that excited me. But no she never asks for that in preference to the 'real' me.

    She had boyfriends before me but not sex, she is a Nurse so has seen plenty in her time but never compares. Do not get me wrong, if she see's a well endowed man she may think, Mmm, or whatever. Much the same as when I see an attractive lady but not as an alternative.

    I hope I have been of some help, but remember "it ain't what you got it is the way that you use it "

    I often ask is she enjoying sex but only asked about size once. That was the first time after my Circumcision. And she said it felt thinner, and there was me thinking it looked bigger ! You can't win them all.

    Good luck

  • Just like I said, some think it's small. I'd kill for 6" erect! I only have 4" erect.

  • I think you are worrying about the wrong things. Go for intimacy not just sex. Then move onto sexual experiments like fingers and oral. From there you can move onto the padded condom if needed. Take things slow, make sure your wife is enjoying it and then if you are really confident you could discuss a threesome. I have in the past suggested similar but the answer was a definite NO. She is happy to fantasise and make up a story but that is as far as it goes. Do not stress.

  • Thank you for your comments. I'm really obsessed with the size of my penis. I know my wife tells me it's fine and fills her, but I can't help thinking she is just being nice.

    Every man I look at I automatically assume they are well endowed.

    I'm so jealous of really handsome men with really attractive wives because I know they are hung. Those attractive women would never like a guy like me because of my lack of manhood.

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