Shell shocked : Hi, all this is very... - Sudden Cardiac Ar...

Sudden Cardiac Arrest & Heart Attack

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Shell shocked

Adc1960 profile image
19 Replies

Hi, all this is very new to me. My husband had a heart attack last Tuesday in the early hoursof the morning. He's been released from LGI after having one stent fitted due to a blockage. He's been told that he may need another as they noticed a further narrowing - too small to do anything about. He's got a wheelbarrow of tablets.

What can I do to help him? He's been scared after this. How long is recovery? Etc etc

Thanks x

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Adc1960
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19 Replies

My husband had a heart attack two weeks ago, he was rushed to James Cook hospital and had a stent fitted too. I know you are feeling the same as I am. Shocked and wondering how to help.

To be honest the only advise that I can give you is to speak to his doctors as much as you can and go to the appointments with him. He'll come home with seven tons of booklets about diet and medications and there is no one to talk to you because as far as they are concerned he is the patient, not you! I know how hard that bit of the situation can be!

They should have told him what to take when. I got a pill organiser and sorted my husbands morning and evening pills into it so that it was easy for him to see what to take and when.

I'm hoping that all goes well, I'm two weeks in so far and it's not nice to deal with. My husband is 64 and self employed and this whole thing has been hideous and harrowing.

Me again! Forgot to say that my husband is a born and bred Yorkshire man who never visited the doctor for anything up until this point. He's stubborn.

Hoping your man is doing ok.

But how are you? Nobody asks, do they? Are you ok?

Adc1960 profile image
Adc1960 in reply to

Thank you for the sound advice. I will try and attend his appointments with him. Let's face it , it's easy to forget important points when you are out of your comfort zone.

My husband is a Yorkshire man so I know what you mean about stubborn! Good at putting his head in the sand too.

I'm not sure howI feel at the moment if that makes sense? I keep thinking I've let him down etc .

Xxxx

markc100 profile image
markc100

hi,

just be by his side taking tablets is the easy part of that happened. If he needs to talk to someone let me know. We are all friends here

Adc1960 profile image
Adc1960 in reply to markc100

Thank you Mark. Very kind of you x

Karenpr profile image
Karenpr

Hey been there ladies, my husband had a cardiac arrest in July and we are still here. You will go through the waking at 3am is he still breathing, is he still alive when you come home scenario. So don't think you're the only one going nuts!! As far as pills are concerned I downloaded an app called Medisafe and you can load all the pills, shape, colour, dosage, time to take onto it and it sends you an alarm when to take you pills. You can also add the number of pills you have so it can work out when you need to renew your "stash".

Get him moving, slow gentle walks to start. We were told by one month he should be able to walk for 30mins, holding a conversation and slightly out of breathe. I gave my husband my old Fitbit and he is addicted and bought his own more up to date version. Cardio Rehab will contact you eventually for some gentle exercise, do it.

Take care of yourself as well, get out with your girlfriends, if you have children young or old make sure they are on board with what has happened, especially the youngsters they bottle stuff up and are scared like you and him.

As Mark says we are all here together and you will get lots of good advice from the hospital.

Adc1960 profile image
Adc1960 in reply to Karenpr

Thanks. The waking in the night to check he's ok was really bed last night as it was a week ago that it happened. Thought I was going round the twist to be honest. I will have a look at the medication app for him. It is overwhelming at the moment but the kind and helpful words mean a lot. Thank you x

Karenpr profile image
Karenpr in reply to Adc1960

Hang in there, it honestly does get better. The major worrying goes away. I had to train my husband to answer me when I came in, else I was running up the stairs expecting to find him on the floor.

Adc1960 profile image
Adc1960 in reply to Karenpr

Scary times. Thanks it's reassuring that others have been through this. It's so kind of you to share your experience. Xx

sca2013 profile image
sca2013

Speaking as one who survived cardiac arrest, I tell you make sure your needs are taken care. Then you will be better able to take care of your husband's needs, as he realizes he really does need your help. Denial was really a big for me, until I realized I was no longer invincible. It's quite a shock for both of you, for sure. In the beginning just take it a day at time, more than that it can get overwhelming at times. Things will improve over time as you guys adjust to your new lives. Recovery is different for everyone depending on what happened. It may take a few weeks to a few months or longer to establish some kind of new normal. Since we never know what may happen in the future all we can do is take the best actions we know of now and hope for the best. I found some days that meant just focusing on getting through the next hour or day at a time. If you have other questions, please feel free to ask them.

Adc1960 profile image
Adc1960 in reply to sca2013

Thank you for your useful reply. Very helpful xx

Andyman profile image
Andyman

Unfortunately all you can do is give him moral support. His recovery is down to him. Sure you can cook the right food but he has to be commited to a change ekse he will have another. He needs the support of friends he meets at the rehab classes as he will be able to talk to them as they will know what he is going through. You might think you understand but its is a truelly personal experience and a mind shattering time thinking it will happen again at anytime. So support him. Don't smother him and one day he will come out the other side. But he will have changed.

Adc1960 profile image
Adc1960

Thanks xx

pinnelli profile image
pinnelli

I know how he feels. Last year I was in same boat. I took lots of advice, went to rehab and met and talked to others and I also got anxiety support, again just talking and sharing the experience.

My wife had a partners session at rehab too which helped. In that session she met the lady who headed up the anxiety support clinics so it all came together.

There's no magic wand and everyone copes differently in life but time is a healer and life starts s to return.

Tell him to enjoy the rest and be selfish with his time for a while.

For me it took as they say about 6 months to feel half decent and then a year to be feeling nearly normal! There again I had out of hospital cardiac arrest so a real blow.

Take care it gets better

Adc1960 profile image
Adc1960 in reply to pinnelli

Thank you xxx

kazy09 profile image
kazy09 in reply to pinnelli

Hello my partner had a sca at home in march. It has been so hard. He was a bricklayer an hard working. I had to give up work to look after him now we are on benefits an our life has changed drastically, I can’t ever see him working again he is 60 yrs of age, he relys on me so much. Sometimes I feel di suffocated.

kazy09 profile image
kazy09 in reply to pinnelli

My partner had his cardiac at home early hours of the morning. It’s been 8 months now an very hard to cope sometimes. Our whole lives have changed he is only 60 an I 57, he is ill with something every week. All he wants to do is watch tv. I feel selfish but I want more then this for the rest of my life. Have you any advise please

Thank you

Jennygriffin profile image
Jennygriffin

Hi My name is Jenny I had 2heart attacks over 3 years ago now.......scared. It does get easier. Make sure he goes to rehab...that was good everyone in the same boat but with different experiences...After that I went to the gym and had a special program to follow..lots of support.. I had some very good advice, 1 listen to your own body.....no one else knows how your body is.....if you need to rest , rest..2 Also try and do a little more each day...even if it is to walk 10 paces more....3 speak to other people, get outdoors, even if it is only in the garden......fresh air is good for you...

I see every day now as a bonus, My tablets got less, and not so much of a nightmare,be warned they often come in different shapes and colours which can be confusing...

enjoy life. It will improve.

Adc1960 profile image
Adc1960 in reply to Jennygriffin

Thanks for the positive remarks. Very helpful. When I'm home I try to get him out so see different places. His friend pops round to go out for a walk with him once a week. Also my next-door neighbour takes him out after he's walked up to he stables where her horse it. She's a nurse and says he has to keep up the exercise then he can go for afternoon tea with her😊

Take care xx

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