I can hardly believe I am writing this but our turn is finally here.
My lovely little mum has had enough and as hard as it is I've had to stop forcing her to eat and drink. She went downhill on Saturday. She was holding food in her mouth but i couldnt accept it and continued with complan and icecream the only two foods that she would accept
I finally rang our McMillan nurse and doctor on Monday and it was confirmed mum is in her final days.
Can i still give her icecream i stupidly asked not wanting to believe that she was really going to die i thought back to Monday evening the icecream was just trickling from her mouth as it melted .
So of course fast track funding kicked in straight away. I can have as little or as much help as I need. Amazing!!!!
As i wake this morning by my mums side in her hospital bed shes still with me peaceful .The little dog is curled up on her bed which I brought into mums room last night. My daughter moved in yesterday and is sleeping upstairs on standby if i need her.
Yesterday family were in and out all day sitting with mum talking to her there were buckets of tears but laughter too and memories told. She lay there peaceful throughout occasionally opening her eyes. She was listening and taking everything in.
Doris Day music played in the background all day mum looked as beautiful as ever in her pale blue nightdress with a little lipstick on of course.
How long has she got left? I dont know the doc said a few days
I pray she will stay as peaceful as she seems to be no drugs are needed at the moment
I miss her already 😥
Sorry if ive rambled Im a bit of a mess. Keep telling mum my hayfever is playing up as I run from her room to wipe away the tears.
Thats all for now thank you for listening. I needed you this morning
Love and hugs
Lynda 💜
Written by
dollydott
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Please, please let the others do the day to day caring. You just concentrate on being her daughter. I know in Steve's final couple of days, I became his wife again, not the down trodden, tired, miserable woman that I had become. I still hold the memory of those precious last days with comfort and so much love. It still feels a real privilege to have been there for him.
Let the tears flow, amongst the laughter. I will never forget Steve's and my daughter, sat on his bed, drinking champagne (it was Christmas Eve and my birthday) singing him all the rude rugby songs, he had taught them as teenagers.
Sending very big hug and much love at this difficult time.
Like you when they told me to stop the feed and the medication I felt guilty and went into denial. My kid sister (5 years younger than me) gave me a big telling off. She had been there before her husband having died with MND. When I accepted reality I was able to cope with the situation and let my wife go in peace. Which she did. P.s. My wife died in her pail blue nightdress which my son & his wife bought her for Christmas. When the undertaker asked us what we wanted her to wear at her cremation I said pail blue nightdress.
May the Lord bless you and keep you and your mum and grant you HIS peace.
I can picture myself doing the same thing with ice cream and having both of our dogs curled up on the bed with my lovely hubby. It’s not going to be easy and when I read posts such as yours about your mum I can really sympathize with you. I’m glad she seems at peace and that you’re there for her. She’s lucky to have you and family around to help her during her final stage. I’m so sorry.
Your dear mum will probably be grateful for the end to come so that she will be free of this dreadful disease, I know my husband welcomed the end, he was too tired to fight anymore. You will be so grateful that you could all be with her and you will feel privileged to be there when the time comes, I know I look back on my husbands death with great sadness but also that the overwhelming feeling of love and warmth in the room was palpable and I will always hold onto that feeling.
You have set such a peaceful scene, Lynda - may however many days are left be as peaceful. Surround yourself with family and friends - your mum will sense a room full of love. Its heart breaking but somehow you will get through it. With love to you and your family. Hils. xx
Thank you so much everyone for your kind words. Love and support. Your all fantastic 😊
Mum had another peaceful day yesterday but the night time came and things changed the anticipatory drugs were required as she became anxious and agitated and was crying out in distress. Truly horrible to witness .The time is now 4.30 am here and the nurses have just left after returning a second time to up the dose. True angels they were gentle and kind and made mum comfortable.
I love her so much but cant bear to see her like this. Her breathing is heavy and she seems to be fighting.
I dont want her to suffer anymore its heart breaking
I think I am nearing this time with my wife so I know how you are feeling. I take some comfort in knowing she is not distressed and I let the carers take the physical burden. Please do not be afraid to cry. I do, regularly, it is part of anticipatory grieving. My thoughts are with you. Rob
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. May God bless you all. I know what it is like. My Wife slipped away in that same peaceful way. 💔🙏🙏💔
Lynda - embrace every minute with her. Tell stories with everyone in the room, make sure someone is always holding her hand. She can hear and feel all the energy in the room. Play here favorite music.
We did the exact same thing for my wife Gloria on her last day (Nov 24, 2018). The memory I will have on that day was every time I gave her a kiss, she would pucker up, so she knew I was there next to her. She took her last breath at 10:14pm.
This was the most amazing experience I have ever gone through, which I will hold near to my heart forever.
You are doing anything but rambling. You are talking through one of the most significant events of your life. God bless you and your mom and your family. Keep talking and writing and reminiscing with your family. And God speed to your mom
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