Another first : Made the decision have... - PSP Association

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Another first

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Made the decision have separate the beds,I'm staying in our room but for 39 years we have slept together.I was having a very difficult time to get him to bed,now I can raise and lower the hospital bed without a whole lot of extra work.Me and the very old dogs will sleep in a twin bed push up against the wall,it's all about them you know😕😴Neil seems to think now he want to sleep on his back so he can see the tv..Trying to tell him that it not a good way for him to sleep,it worked out about as well telling him he could die if he keeps over stuffing his mouth,he says he ok with that.....

Major wine o'clock tonight



12 Replies

Dee, l am without words for you but my heart is full of support for You, Hubby & old Dogs.

Heading to the coffee pot for my first cup of coffee... sending hugs... Granni B

Dadshelper profile image

A hospital bed will make your caring much easier. Dad slept on his back for least 4 years. In fact hardly moved in bed, maybe slide down a bit but never turned on his side etc.


Good Morning Dee,

l love your ending MAJOR WINE O'CLOCK TONIGHT. I think l will join you in a glass of that or maybe a jug.

Well l am back again & fully awake after 2 cups of coffee & shoveling the sidewalk while sitting on my walker. Brrr

Hubby has heart issues so l sneak out while he is asleep. He sleeps in his recliner. He tried a hospital bed but he hated it, so we sold it, moved his comfy recliner into the bedroom & bought a new one for the living room. He can get around without my assistance (which is good because l often need his assistance). He likes to leave the TV on all night for a little noise (loves John Wayne movies). At this stage of life l find myself saying, "Oh Whatever!"

Sending you both hugs... Granni B

P.S. Sometimes l wonder why God gave men ears. L0L

Heady profile image
Heady in reply to

Oh Granni B, I just love your PS! It bought back so many memories of when Steve use to come in, turning on every radio and TV, then clearing off to do something else, leaving me to turn them all off. Even now, two years down the road, I can't bear anything on in the house during the day.

Dee, enjoy your wine o'clock, unfortunately that bought back different memories. Steve never did have to have a hospital bed, managed to win that battle, but I did have to get single quilts, easier to wash!!! My heart goes out to you.

Sending big hug and much love

Lots of love


raincitygirl profile image

I can relate Dee! And my hubby too, didn't care about how he ate in the last years: I tried to limit sugar but he enjoyed his ice cream and he could eat (where so many can't). I figured, what the heck- he's lost so many pleasures, let him have what he can enjoy...mental health is huge when your physical health is going: you know the end isnt far off, so why not get pleasure where you can?

Hugs to you...I'll think of you at wine o'clock 😉

Anne G

in reply to raincitygirl

Anne, you are a wise woman... l have always thought of ice cream as a medicinal suppliment. L0L

Sending hugs, Granni B

Karynleitner profile image

Oh Dee, I was in a similar place one year ago. Dan and I had slept together for 46 years (wow, that makes us old)

Although we had purchases a stair lift chair one year ago , it was no longer safe for him. He has a hospital bed in the living room downstairs. It was a terrible transition for me. He seemed to adjust quickly.

Now I realize he would have to be in his own bed anyway. He cannot stand to be dressed, sleeps entirely on his back and rarely moves. He is doubly incontinent. He needs a bed I can reach him from both sides,.

Honestly, I know enjoy getting him to sleep and going up to my bed too relax a bit . Best of luck to you. This is all tough.


raincitygirl profile image
raincitygirl in reply to Karynleitner

Thinking of you and your hubby Karyn; what a long hard haul you both have had. 💔

❤️❤️❤️. Anne G.

Karynleitner profile image
Karynleitner in reply to raincitygirl

Thanks So much. Most days are fine and my I’m managing OK. I feel bad when I begin feeling sorry for myself. My life is glorious compared to Dan’s. Somedays the suffering, the loss and the sadness can overtake me. Most days we just keeping going.

I hope things are going well for you. May each new day bring you great memories and peace,

I hope you have a good week.


doglington profile image

I remember how I felt when we got the hospital bed. It was a godsend and Chris accepted it well. To me it was a major sign of the future and loss of the present.

Love Jean xx

greelycat profile image

We were just getting to the point of separate beds. I really hated the idea because we spent 36 years with our legs tangled 'round each other, keeping each other warm, and holding hands while falling asleep. I would have had just enough room for two single beds side by side to fit comfortably. There were nights when I had to change the sheets twice per night, so this would have been far easier.

As for sleeping on his back, Gerry always did, though the last couple weeks he had several pillows behind him. I think the point of keeping them at home is so that they can do what they want instead of being force by someone to follow certain rules.

As for stuffing his mouth, Gerry would also tend to get too enthusiastic while eating, causing a choking hazard The swallowing expert (speech/language) suggested this may be because the initial swallow is difficult, so once they manage it they want to keep going while the swallowing is working. In other words they feared that if they stopped it would become difficult again. I couldn't do much about it until he finally allowed me to feed him.

Good luck to you both on your journey together.

Boyce3600 profile image

pls have one for me. i cant find the corkscrew

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