Equipment soothing

It's progressing quickly. Charles can't breathe so we have started low dose morphine. I haven't stopped crying all day.

The sound of the oxygen machine and all the other equipment soothes me because I know someday it will be silent here and I'm afraid and sad knowing it's coming.

Family coming again, he didn't want to get out of bed today, so we did first bed bath, just too tired to do it.


30 Replies

  • Cuttercatt

    He loves you.

    Love him.

    Its what he needs right now - even if you are reaching him through your 'soul' or 'spitit' that which binds you both.

    You will have to bare your loss in time. Let that wait.

    Its hard.

    We're thinking of you.

    Liz and Kevin


  • So sorry, cuttercat.

    Its what is ahead for us all. My heart goes out to you.

    big hug, Jean xxx

  • Hi Cc. I know darling . You have to put on this nice strong face for everyone...I guess....By the time people came over to visit, I really didn't care a rip how I looked or the house....They are going to have to take us as we are....And for me the 02 was so soothing that it lulled me into a somnambulant state usually....but then the suction machine would turn on again and I would snap right out of it.....

    Did you know that Morphine is a bronchodilator? used with atavan it can help them breathe easier....I think it's atavan....

    You breathe easy too....these are the moments you love him and not feel sorry for yourself just love what you meant to each other talk to him talk to your friends with and about him and talk to and with your family and husband of the wonderful reasons you are such a wonderful family.....Let your husband know all the reasons you love him...



  • Yes it's a somnambulant state. Both Morphine and Atavan, yes. You've been there and know the ropes, I'm not far behind. Thank you dear one.

    I'm taking your suggestions as well. You said it perfectly.


  • I'm sorry darlin...I'll be here....

  • Yes. Exactly. Love him Hold him.

    Pray with him. Nothing else matters

  • so poignant

  • Oh so sorry, I am frightened as well when I look at George, feel so lonely. I am saying a pray for you, and you have your family around you, so good isn't it to feel them there xxxxx

  • Yvonne I know you are scared. We who have gone through this were scared too. Amazingly we did it. You get strength to think not of yourself but of the person you love.

    Then you can go to pieces. I keep thinking of Heady and her blanket. I haven't done that yet but can see it coming. After Garry's funeral on Monday and the burial of his ashes on Tuesday I am sure I will need a blanket to hide under.

    That time hasn't come for you yet Yvonne. Don't waste precious time with George. Make sure you tell him how much you love him while you can.

    Marie x

  • Cuttercut so very sorry to hear this news. People have already said it but forget what he's on and just love him. Tell him how much you love him as often as you can. Kiss him and hold his hand. He will know. I know what you are feeling but time to sit down and howl when Charles is no longer with you sweetie.

    God bless you both and give you the strength to get through this for Charles sake and your own.

    Love to you and a huge hug.

    Marie x

  • So sad to read your post, CC. Tried again to call a couple of weeks ago but didn't get you. I continue to pray for you and C, and hope that you can experience peace during this difficult time. I will try to call tomorrow, or you call when things are calm. I plan to be home all day and would love to talk.

  • Hugs to you and your family .its a dreaded road you all are traveling on and do hope that it is a smooth journey .

    Dee in BC

  • Thinking of you and your family bless you xx

  • We have to treasure every moment, some days are harder than others. Love to you both


  • Sending you love & strength xxx

  • Sending big hugs. It's tough but you can do it❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

  • Hi, sorry my reply got lost in the ether!

    You should let the others do the caring now. Anyone can do a bed bath, only you can snuggle up to him and tell him you love him. Take this precious time to be his wife again.

    My thoughts and love are with you and your family.

    Sending big hugs and much love

    Lots of love


  • He has, of today, not left the bed. He is waiting for his family before he succombs to total bedrest and the rest. Too tired he says. But the bed may keep him alive a little while longer.

    Thank you, thank you.


  • My heart goes out to you. Keeping you and your family in my prayers... hugs to you xx

  • Xxxx💕💕💕

  • So sorry Cuttercat for you and your family. As others have written, stay by Charles side and let others do the work. Talk to him about the happy times you had together and how much you love each other. Others posts have said they can still hear even though they are not responding. Praying that you will find strength to get you through this difficult time. Love, Nanny857xx

  • So sorry to hear about your sad situation. I can't imagine how hard it is for you. I am trying not to get too down, despite B having fallen as soon as my back was turned and broken a magazine rack from which a nail damaged a brand new pair of shoes that I had bought for him this morning. "Sod's Law," I think it is called . I am thinking of you and counting my blessings that B . Is still able to fall!!

    As others have said, do be kind to yourself, let others do what is necessary, spend your last hours together, remembering all the good memories that you have shared together. Sending lots of love and hugs. X

  • I don''t know who Sod is , but boy was that law in effect at our house!

  • Its all about adjusments. He's waiting for his family to come. We may have some time, it's not our call but he keeps saying he's tired, tired, tired.

  • God bless you both Cuttercat. I can only imagine how heart wrenching it is. We have this to come with mum, I'm sure this year, but I doubt all the thinking and planning in the world can prepare you for this heartbreaking time. Stay strong, Charkes needs you more than ever now.

    Sending warm hugs your way.

    Love Michele xxx

  • Thank you so much for this! He is comfortable and stable but it still makes it hard for me. Each breath may be the last, though Hospice says it may be a couple of months, who knows.



  • The thought of a couple of months must be awful. At this stage I'd have thought a couple of days would be enough to endure for anybody. We want our loved ones to remain with us always but we don't want them to suffer. Just know my love that you are an amazing person and to support Charles as you do is beyond amazing, it is a strength that not many people can muster. You are not alone. We are all here supporting you.

    Much love xxxxxxx

  • Thank you for your sweet reply. I know! He isn't suffering per se, just can't breathe. It will diminish and then. But now he's trying hard, hard to be here with me and us.


  • I so know what you're going through.....God bless you


    For God will swallow up death in victory; and the Lord God will wipe away tears from off all faces:....Isaiah 25:8

  • How are you CC?

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