Just sharing this in case it sheds some light for others, or if another has the same experience.
I was talking with Kevin today about risk.
I told him that I sometimes want to spill my coffee on the bed, or do the opposite of he or anyone expects or hopes for.
I want control of my life back. I want to decide what I want. I want to do things and do them the way I like.
Kevin doesn't want me to use the word 'power' here... But that is what I want in my life. (argument with typist - Kevin - ensues... with chuckles).
I want power back! - I won.
I feel compelled to do these disruptive things. Up until now I have not done them. We cannot work out if these thoughts are being driven by frustration or whether they are just part of having a PSP brain.
I don't want to make things hard for Kevin, but the thoughts just keep coming from time to time, every day.