17 Years and still alive.

Removal of my prostate in 2000 was the biggest change in my life. I was 47 at the time. The cancer was encapsulated within the prostate. I was very lucky. My Uncle at the time was 74 and he was Diagnosed with PC which prompted me to call my doctor for a PSA test. The doctor reluctantly did the blood work and was very apologetic when the results came back.

I thought my life as a gay man was over. I did so enjoy ejaculating and now that visual aspect was gone. Still I did not feel like the same person. It has taken 17 years to move on. First 5, then 8, 10, 15 and now 17 years free of cancer and alive.

I do so wish this site was around back then. I really needed to talk to someone. It will get better. Once the fear of dying from cancer is gone, you begin to live again.

9 Replies

  • thanks for this posting--it's been almost six years for me and it's been a struggle to reclaim/continue my life as a gay man, too, even with this site and its predecessor (not quite from the beginning)--everyone's history is a little different, and an RP (or other treatment) will have effects that will interact with each history--if one is single or not, "happy" or not, with or without other medical problems, etc. etc. --but for everyone this site is at least a partial answer to isolation and an encouragement

  • I must be the odd one. I never once thought that I'd die from the cancer. I kept a very positive attitude and I think that helped. Of course, the side affects and issues that come with having your prostate removed can be very depressing and overwhelming but for anyone out there who fears death, I can't of course promise anything depending on how far the cancer has progressed, but a positive attitude is the best medicine

  • Thank you for your positive statement. I will celebrate five years free of cancer in February when I also celebrate my 72nd birthday. I have struggled with the changes in my sex life since my RP surgery, but because of my Gleason numbers, surgery was my best option. I feel that the surgery probably saved my life and I am grateful for that. I must say that as time passes, I become more comfortable with my life post RP.

  • I had mine in 2005 and like your encapsulated but I was 53. Now still have problems with ED but very much alive.

  • Had mine in 2001, encapsulated but had localised failure in 2004 so radiation and now with PSA just over 6 looking to start some sort of ADT. My partner walked in 2010 and to be honest I have struggled with relationships ever since, had a couple of guys who just could not cope with the lack of juice and the need for some chemical assistance to get hard. I have plenty of guys that want sex but I now lack the courage to sit them down beforehand and get the facts out. Being a Top makes it all the harder, if you excuse the pun. I have a profile on Gaydr that has all the facts about my condition listed and it gets a lot of hits and I have made friends all over the UK with guys that are in the same position.

  • I really miss that visual too! The only weird thing about my life changing is that my orgasms are actually better than they were and I thought they were good then! I'm getting used to not getting hard and my shorter dick but like everyone tells me...I'm alive!

  • What used to take my hand to do now takes 3 fingers. Never had skin on the head and now it's half way covered. This can cause problems when leakage keeps you moist. At first the doc gave me a prescription cream and that didn't seem to work. Then he suggested Desitin. I used it for a while until I notice that around the healing skin the edges would be enhanced by the white cream. This was embarrassing at the urinal. Finally I used chapstick!! It was small enough to carry in my pocket and I use it on the head each time I urinate. It has done the job. I use Cherry flavored just in case.

    The Pad and the Washer. (When I used one). That is another story............

  • It is kind of hot having semiforeskin! Mine stays behind my head luckily so I haven't had any problems. Physically and mentally I know I am not the same person I was before the surgery which will be 6 years ago in March. Day by day everyone.

  • I agree Mishaw. My experience is similar to yours. I am always here if you need someone to "talk" with. Best wishes, Buck

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