They tell me i'm doing great but, I s... - Prostate Cancer A...

Prostate Cancer And Gay Men

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They tell me i'm doing great but, I sometimes regret having my prostate removed.

DwayneN profile image
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I don't want to come across ungrateful because I know I am extremely blessed. I had 2 uncles die within a year of each other from prostate cancer. A year later another uncle was diagnosed with (PC) but, he had them do every procedure possible. I'm happy to say he's been cancer free for 10 years. I know I made the correct decision but, it's really hard being a single gay man Post-Operation. How do I meet other guys to date? I'm not comfortable with the erectile dysfunction or bladder issue. My therapist and psychiatrist (yes i have both) are understanding but, they think i'm being hard on myself. Where are the other gay Prostate Cancer Survivors in Los Angeles. I really just need some friends other then my doctors or family. I know i'm not alone, but it sure feels like it.

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DwayneN
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Tall_Allen profile image
Tall_Allen

Yes, it is a difficult situation. How long ago was your surgery? What kind of penile rehab are you doing?

There is a gay prostate cancer support group that meets twice a month, on the first and third Tuesday of the month from 7-9 PM at 1220 North Highland (east side of Highland, between Lexington and Fountain, gate will hopefully open when you pull in driveway). So our next meeting is this coming Tuesday Dec. 20. I hope to see you there!

Tall_Allen profile image
Tall_Allen in reply toTall_Allen

I was hoping to meet you last night, but I know the holidays can get in the way. I wanted to let you know that we are changing our location, but we will still meet on the first and third Tuesdays of each month. The next meeting will be Tuesday January 3 from 7-9PM. The new location will be in the main LGBT Building at 1625 Schrader Blvd (between Hollywood and Selma), Room 106B. You can park behind the building. I hope to see you there.

nacinla profile image
nacinla

Dwayne: Yes, you're not alone. Join us at the PC group Allen mentions herewith. Great group of guys, with different experiences.

jimreilly profile image
jimreilly

I'm not in LA but there are a lot of us out here in the internet world. I'm finally comfortable (it took me a few years!) telling potential partners what my situation is and while at my age the pickings are sparse anyway (I'm 73 and I guess I'm too fussy) there have been a few successes and I'm hoping for more. What does being "hard on yourself"? If it means being dissatisfied, so be it (I certainly don't "like" my own limitations). But you can't let the dissatisfaction with what you can't do keep you from enjoying what you can, then you're missing even more than you have to.

Guido63 profile image
Guido63

Hey Dwayne, I can really relate to how you are feeling being single while dealing with this. I'm 53 and almost a year post surgery with some ED issues (not sure how much is physical and how much is mental) and some mild incontinence issues. I can joke with my friends about it but really haven't tried to date much since surgery. My few attempts at hooking up left me feeling awkward and damaged. These days I'm just focusing on my kegels and hoping things continue to improve.

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