Totally distraught and worried!!!

[monkee641]

Hi everyone, I’m so scared. I really need someone to tell me everything will be okay. I keep crying as I’m so distraught this has happened. My husband is amazing but can only do and say so much as this isn’t happening to him. I really need hope right now.

I’m soon to be 42 and am 5 months postpartum. I had an episiotomy and forceps delivery. Recovery time was pretty good, and apart from lots and lots of lochea, things healed up well. But then of course came the stress incontinence. It was fairly mild to start with, with just the odd leak. I know this is quite natural so close to the birth of our baby, so wasn’t too panicked. I did have the odd accident where I didn’t make it to the toilet tho. So I mentioned this to my GP at our 8 week postnatal check, and was referred to the physio. The physio gave me an internal examination and just told me to carry on with my kegels. Which I have done. I thought things were starting to improve.

Around a week ago, I started to notice more leaking when I had thought it was getting better. Imagine my surprise when in the bath, I discovered a bulge between my legs. I believe I now have a pelvic prolapse. And now every night I have started to experience moderate lower back pain and pelvic pain. Last night was particularly bad tho and had me crying very late at night. I was also not able to breast feed my baby due to the pain, as I just couldn't hold her. She is by no means a big baby!

This worries me so much, I don’t know what to do, if I’m struggling to hold my baby now, what does this mean for the future. Can I be fixed? I’m so worried. I love what my amazing body did for me, it grew the most amazing beautiful little girl I’ve ever seen in my life, but I feel that now it’s letting me down. I can’t live like this and need to know I can be fixed. All I keep thinking is that I can’t be the best mum I can be to her if this is going to affect my life. Please help 😢 x x

[M_fox]

please speak to your doctor this can be fixed and they should be able to give you pain relief. Don’t suffer xx good luck xx

[Stargirl26]

Hi Monkee641

So sorry you’re experiencing so much distress, first of all, write it all down to get it out of your mind, then you can contact the right people to help.

I had an episiotomy and forceps delivery too. I was advised by hospital triage to empty my bladder every 2 hours to prevent any stress on bladder so that could help. Also, call the physio team and ask them for an appointment to be checked out if you think you do have prolapse.

I understand it’s so distressing when you can’t BF your baby too. A few bottle feeds by your hubby while you’re really struggling will not do any harm and will give you some space to sort your body out. Take some paracetamol to ease some pain and talk to a good friend/mum friend/ health visitor too to get it out as well.

Hope you get it sorted quickly and the right people are available to help xx

[Gardener11]

if you can’t get to a doctor quickly then call 111 and see what they advise. This sounds so awful! You’re managing really well! It is brutal what women have to endure but the body does heal with time. Can you breastfeed laid down on your side so you don’t have to hold your baby? Use pillows to prop you up and keep you comfy. I hope you get help soon.

[Positivechangeplease]

Hi, so sorry you’re having problems and as the others have said go straight back to the doctor. I was 41 when I gave birth too and now approaching 43. I had complete incontinence after birth and they wanted to fit a catheter. The nurse wasn’t I don’t think equipped to deal with it and trying was very painful so I went back home with incontinence although it had fixed rapidly. The next few weeks I developed the rigours same ended up with what I think was a kidney infection - was admitted to A&E and was very resistant to antibiotics. Eventually it resolved and in the meantime I was referred to the pelvic physio who checked my kegels method and short and long and in the end said it would always take at least a year to start being normal. My pelvic floor is not what it was… it’s mostly okay but sometimes I feel a weakness and kegels have to be done for life.

In your case it does sound like prolapse and tbh I think you should be rushed in for surgery and all my post is meant to mean is whilst it seems really bad right now. Time will heal and in the end you will be okay and it will seem a distant memory. But my suggestion now is you get admitted to acute gynaecology they usually have a drop in service you can be referred for (probably same day by your GP)