10 weeks pregnant and anxious

[vikki_clare]

Hi, I'm Vikki. I'm 10 weeks pregnant and this is the second attempt at my first child. I lost my last one at 12.5 weeks, I only found out when I went for my scan. It's taken just under a year to fall pregnant again and I'm terrified the same is going to happen. My scan is 2 weeks today, any advice or good news stories would be appreciated xx

[ReBeCcA-90]

I know exactly how u feel the exact same thing happened to me last year... After 5 years of trying we found out we were expecting, but at 12 week scan she told us there was no heartbeat, was a complete shock had no bleeding or cramping or anything, that was 15th April last year-will never forget. On 26th had ERPC op to remove baby, thought I would never get over it! 3 months later in early August fell again, the first 12 weeks went so slow like 10 years, I worked myself into a right state day of scan couldn't even keep water down, but I went in and she said all was fine this time instead of sad crying I had a happy cry, she couldn't do scan though as bladder wasn't full enough, had to wait into waiting room and drink, she said she'd come and get me In 30 minutes, so she went on and scanned someone else a hour later she came out in tears-I knew exactly what had happened, still think about her now- I think it's more common than people think. I am now 37 weeks and 5 days and although pregnancy has dragged all is going well! I have known so many women who have had a miscarriage first time but went on to have healthy babies, I would say to try and relax however I didn't, I am sure all will be fine! If u ever need to chat I am here and know exactly what u r going through! Xx

[Natisuka in reply to ReBeCcA-90]

I am 5 weeks as per the calculator, and I cannot get an appointment with GP until next week, two of my friends had had miscarriages lately and after trying for nearly a year I am scared to my mind. Also I have a cold and I do not want to take anything but not getting any better. I do not think I can wait for 6 more weeks to get a scan. Any tips or words of advice?

[ReBeCcA-90 in reply to Natisuka]

Don't think the cold will harm although u feel rubbish I had 2 colds before 12 weeks, didn't take anything either time! If u were 7 weeks or later and concerned I would say to pop in to a and e, they wouldn't scan though unless u were bleeding or having cramps but u could always say u were having cramps just to get scan, but around 7 weeks for me I was paranoid I was having another miscarriage I phoned doctor and he referred me for a scan-all was fine. But as u r only 5 weeks even if u went for a scan they may not be able to c heartbeat as baby is too small, this may mean all us fine but not seeing a heartbeat could make u worry for no reason! If I was u I would give it a couple of weeks then phone doc if still concerned tell him a few porkies (if u r comfortable with this) say that ur symptoms have disappeared and u have been having cramps hopefully he will send u 4 a early scan, as for cold I would try and ride it out but drink plenty of fluids, or if ur struggling maybe pop into chemist and ask them what u can take whilst being pregnant! Hope this all helps xx

[Thingandgeorge in reply to Natisuka]

Just hold fire. There is a reason why they make you wait until week 12. Miscarriages are so common (25%) in the first 12 weeks. In the 1960s woman had to wait until they missed 3 periods before their dr would even record them as pregnant!

[vikki_clare in reply to ReBeCcA-90]

Hi Rebecca thanks for the reply. I never knew this type of miscarriage was common. I never showed any signs either. They never offered me an op but I went through 3 weeks of hell before I got the all clear. I want to believe that everything will be ok but it's taken so long to get pregnant. The closer I get to the scan date the more I can't sleep which is making me irritable to say the least! It must have been so sad to watch the lady come out upset. I felt awful after I was complaining to my husband about other ladies queue jumping at my first scan appointment! It's reassuring to know you are at 37 weeks and healthy. Do you know the gender or are you having a surprise?

[ReBeCcA-90 in reply to vikki_clare]

We're having a surprise, although there are some times I wished I'd asked too late now, we were 90% sure it's a girl but as we get closer we r thinking it may be a boy! Will u want to know? Xx

[vikki_clare in reply to ReBeCcA-90]

I think surprises are good, it gives you something to aim for! My husband wants to know so I think I will cave as he's been really supportive and I've not been easy to handle lately. I think it's his treat, he's desperate for a boy as he has a girl from a previous relationship. Belongs it's healthy i don't mind. Do you have a preference? xx

[ReBeCcA-90 in reply to vikki_clare]

I always wanted a mummy's boy but after being convinced it's a girl for so long i have got used to the thought of having a girl but I won't be disappointed with either, partner has one of each from a previous relationship, his daughter wants a girl and his son wants a boy, so someone will be disappointed, however I am sure that when's it's here both will be happy! Xx

[vikki_clare in reply to ReBeCcA-90]

Not long to wait now, I hope the labour goes well. I'm sure everyone will be happy no matter the gender. Good luck xx

[Thingandgeorge]

I also lost my first pregnancy last year at 9 weeks. Im pregnant again and the first few weeks were agony. I've just passed the 9 week mark and feeling a lot more positive. Just because you miscarried before, it doesn't mean you will again.

Folic acid reduces the risk of miscarriage by encouraging maternal tissue growth. Also avoid caffeine and don't let your body overheat (no saunas, Jacuzzis and don't overdo it at the gym until week 12).

Please don't blame yourself for the previous miscarriage. Early miscarriages are normally due to abnomalities.

[vikki_clare in reply to Thingandgeorge]

Thanks for your reply, you do have a tendency to blame yourself but I know I didn't do anything wrong. I've been taking folic acid and vitamin D for a long time now so I hope that helps. This time I've also cut caffeine out which has been very difficult! ! Do you have a scan date yet?

[Thingandgeorge in reply to vikki_clare]

No I have my booking appointment tomorrow and I think my scan will be in 2 weeks time x

[vikki_clare in reply to Thingandgeorge]

Good luck, hope it goes well. You will have to let me know how you get on! x

[Bea9000]

Congratulations on your pregnancy!

I had a miscarriage in August last year, and I was 12 weeks when it happened. The nurse thought my baby had stopped growing around 5/6 weeks but it had taken until then for my body to catch up and realise the baby wasn't growing anymore. It was awful and I decided against having any operation or help. I wanted it to happen naturally so I felt like I had some control over the situation, it took me awhile before I felt ready to try again and I am now 9 weeks pregnant I was worrying a lot and phoned my Early Pregnancy Unit who have offered me a few scans, I got to see the baby at 5 weeks, 6 weeks and 8 weeks which was amazing and so reassuring. I would suggest if you were worried, try getting in touch with them if you have a unit at your hospital. I have one more reassurance scan booked for next week then that should be me until my official dating scan around 12 weeks. Even though I have passed the point that my last baby stopped growing, I am still a ball of nerves and cant stop worrying about it all. What I have found helps is when I start feeling worried, I go out and buy a little something for the baby to forward plan to make sure I know this is real - daft I know! I have some baby grows, some little dummies and some baby bath stuff, those little things make it more real! Good luck, take it easy and we are here for you xx

[vikki_clare in reply to Bea9000]

Hi, sorry to hear it happened to you as well and congratulations on the pregnancy. Thanks for the advice about getting the reassurance scans, my midwife never offered me an early scan or the option to have reassurance scans. I was a little disappointed that I have to wait a month between appointments. I would love to start buying things but my husband would get upset with me. He's trying to remain grounded and a little reserved after last time. I'm a little stuck at the moment, I'm going to have to buy new clothes shortly as I'm showing already. This time I look more pregnant, sound's weird I know! When is your dating scan? Everyone has been really supportive on here wish I'd have found this earlier! Hope your doing ok as well xx

[Bea9000 in reply to vikki_clare]

1 in 3 women will suffer a miscarriage according to my midwife so it is so common, just not well talked about! I was the first of my friends and family to go through it so I found a lot of comfort online from other women when I realised how many went through what I did. My midwife didn't offer me the scans, it was the nurse who confirmed my miscarriage told me that when I got pregnant again to call them for extra scans - if your hospital has the unit then give them a call and explain what happened before and they should give you a scan. well worth it! I know what you mean, this time round my symptoms are a lot more than my last pregnancy which is a great sign - great to hear you are looking more pregnant, that is a great sign Not sure when my dating scan is, I am due to get a letter with the date in the next week as I had my first midwife appointment a week and a half ago! Doing great, boobs feel like I've been shot haha! but the pain and queasiness is worth it! xx

[vikki_clare in reply to Bea9000]

I never realised miscarriages were so common, like you said no one talks about it. I was the first in my family and friends as well, it was very awkward. Every one meant well but they never felt comfortable talking about it. I'm glad you've got strong symptoms as well, I'm hoping it's a better sign. My first appointment was 2 weeks ago and I still haven't received confirmation of the appointment or my maternity notes yet. The nausea is terrible I have to keep reminding myself that it's a good sign! I'm lucky that my boobs don't hurt just growing massive! ! you will have to let me know when your scan is, there are a few people who are a similar time. Hope everything goes well xx