im 26 weeks with my 2nd and i had a consultant app at 20 weeks ( next 1 will be at 36 weeks) well i went in with the decision, made not lightly may i add ! that i wanted an elective this time and thought that this would be granted without question but it kind of wasnt , although my notes say i wish to have an elective at 39 weeks, it also says trial of labour ! which i really dont want to do for reasons i will go through now ,
my son now 3 is super happy and healthy : ) but his birth was rather tramatic for me , apart from the mass feeling of failure on my part which took me over 2 years to come to terms with and get over ! because it didnt happen as i kind of expected it to, i feel like it kind of took away from my experience as a new mum ! il go through the labour and stats iv found
- at 1 week over midwife gave me a sweep , cervics soft and ready , dilated about 2cm : )
wed am
- contractions started late that night ,waters went early thur and contractions continued all day getting stronger , went to hospital about 7pm , checked my waters and wernt happy wih the colour , did a trace on baby and wasnt happy with that either , by now my contractions had all but stopped so they said i would b going on the ward for drip to get them going again, really it shouldnt have been till the following morning but they were quiet so told me go and sort what i needed and come back to b booked in on ward at 1am fri .
- drip was started , contractions strong had gas and air , baby went back to back had dia morphine
-baby had probe on his head to check hb , had decelerations down to 20 beats per min , rushed for c section , baby stabilised ( another lady now needed an emergency section) so i was put back on ward , baby had dramatic decels again so was rushed back , as the other lady was still in havin her op they were planning on knocking me out and doing my op in the anistesioligist room , baby stabilised again and was able to wait till other lady finished and got the spinal , baby born 9.23am fri morning , come out blue but i didnt see that, i know he didnt cry till he was on the table they have ready for baby .
- they couldnt tell me a specific reason for distress but he had pooed ( pooed because of distress or distressed because he pooed) and came out with an infection which ment 5 days of antibiotics in hospital and they wanted to do a lumber punch on him at 2 days old which i wouldnt let them do as i saw no positive , they know he had an infection and was treating him for it .
- i thought ( was told at the time ) i got to 4 cm in labour but consultant said my notes said 2cm ! which doesnt make me a good candidate for vbac, also my bmi was 32 and have only given birth via section, all these factors go agains me.
- 33 % of women try vbac and 75% ( 3/4 ) are sucessfull , but i think this is a low % for trying in the 1st place , success rate for vbac after fetal distress goes down to 66 % so again my chances go down .
im not scared of natural labour and delivery if i could wish it i would , if they could tell me i would definatly be sucessfull i would do it but obviously no one can, my fear is another emergency section which far outweighs my desire to birth naturally . i think a factor is if i dont try, i dont fail ! to fail once is bad , twice ! i dont know how i would handel that in the event it did happen .
i know a number of people that had emergency sections and most had elective 2nd time and said overall it was a much nicer experience , 1 ended with another emergency an said it was far worse than 1st time , 1 went natural after 3 days labour and ended up with neary 50 stitches after assisted delivery !
the consultant gave all the pros of natural and all the cons of elective , its really bothering me that trial of labour is down for me , i am an assertive person and didnt go in expecting to come up against the wall i did( when talking about my experience and decision tears were litterally rolling down my face ) so will be going back arguing my case at next consultant but still scared they will just ignore me again .
anyone with similar experience (not people who are gererally scared of birth and think section is best for them, or medical reason for elective section , i dont mean anything by that i just would like people who have experienced emergency ) of the people i know who had emergencys i seem to b the only 1 who had the issue of feeling like a failure when it come to child birth !
also i did breastfeed, 4 weeks by myself and another 4 weeks breast and bottle which is surposed to b harder after a section so ...
any one enlighten me on the ' facts ' as iv found it pretty had to get info
also a slight factor in my decision is my son starts school sep , my babys due date is 23 aug so if i waited for natural and ended up with a section i would not be on my feet for his 1 days at big school ( he goes nursery 3 days now while i work ) if im delivered at 39 weeks it will give me a couple of weeks to get up and about . i just cant shake the feeling i will end up with a section if i tried natural.
sorry for the essay.