Virtual hug needed

[Groggrim]

Good morning. In addition to 'suspected' PMR I live with chronic fatigue syndrome which also flares up under stress. I am quite bad at listening or taking notice of advice, thinking I know best (I don't). I was an only child raised with material needs met but very little emotional input or interaction with others. As a result I am not very good at taking advice as my parents' advice was rules and regulations. I see so much good advice here that I need to listen to, having got myself to a point where I feel quite wretched this morning after failing physically to get to the local shop and having to come back without getting any milk. I don't want to have a pity party but a virtual hug would be very welcome.

[PMRpro Ambassador]

Hugs aplenty here!! 🤗🤗🤗🤗

I don't think I have ever failed physically to get to a shop having set out - mainly because I have no compunction about getting the car out if I am feeling ropey before I leave! We have aids available to to us for those occasions - there is no shame in taking advantage of them when the distance to the shop is greater than the energy available. Especially for milk - when a cup of tea is what will make it look better.

[Groggrim in reply to PMRpro]

Thanks, I no longer drive and the shop is only at the end of an alleyway opposite our house. That's what made it so depressing not being able to get to the end of an alleyway 🙁

[PMRpro Ambassador in reply to Groggrim]

Oh dear - yes, see the problem. Is there no-one around who could be delegated?

[Groggrim in reply to PMRpro]

Of course, hubby already said he'd go (and ended up going anyway). But I just can't (or won't) give in 🙄

[PMRpro Ambassador in reply to Groggrim]

It is right not to give in - but learn to pick your battles!!!! You will be able to go tomorrow, or the day after. And there are things YOU can do in the house to give him the space to fetch the milk. Marriage is a joint enterprise and you can swap duties when things go downhill. You know stress does neither illness any good - and you get a double dose of fatigue anyway.

[Groggrim in reply to PMRpro]

Absolutely, he already reminded me that I went to the shop very successfully on Tuesday. Since this illness I seem to see things as 'all or nothing'. I have lost the ability to rationalise things

[Groggrim in reply to PMRpro]

All I hear is my mother's voice telling me to 'stop feeling sorry for yourself'. I'll be ok tomorrow. Thanks for listening

[suzy1959]

So sorry that you are struggling today. One thing I have learnt the hard way is that nothing stays the same- everything is always changing. As a “survivor” of nearly 13 years with PMR, despite many ups and downs ( more downs!), I am still here and on holiday in Sri Lanka! Try to stay hopeful 🤗and life will go on.

[Charlie1boy in reply to suzy1959]

Absolutely loved Sri Lanka when we holidayed there many years ago. Such lovely people, and likewise food.

Enjoy.

[DorsetLady PMRGCAuk volunteer]

Hugs a plenty on their way 🤗🤗🤗… and you haven’t failed, you just struggled to get there… but other days you have done it, and in future will do it with no problem.

Today is just today, tomorrow it will be yesterday and forgotten. 🌸

Not failing

[Groggrim in reply to DorsetLady]

Thank you very much x

[August7]

🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂 you are doing amazingly well I think (for what that’s worth)X

[Groggrim in reply to August7]

Thank you for the hugs (August 7 is our wedding anniversary. Golden next year 🙂)

[Excelsior80]

Some days staying in bed with a good book seems the best option! hope you feel better soon.

[Obscureclouds]

🫂🫂🫂Lots of hugs - hope it helps to know people on here want to support and send their best wishes if that helps in some small way. Severe fatigue was the major symptom of my illness so I know what that feels like when you haven’t got the energy to walk even a few yards. 🤞 Pred seems to have solved the fatigue issues for me. Fortunately it never made me feel down but I was always sure to congratulate myself for the times I could do a bit more. Be kind to yourself - we face so many challenges and can only do our best. ❤️‍🩹

[Groggrim in reply to Obscureclouds]

Thank you for the positive encouragement and hugs x