I saw a poster that said
"I'm not pretending to be sick; I'm pretending to be well."
Wow that says it for me! I'm sure many of you can relate!
This line really resonated with me...: I saw a... - PMRGCAuk
This line really resonated with me...
Written by
SheilasPMR
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62 Replies
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Yes, I can really relate to that one 
PMRproAmbassador
You just have to know when to do which ...
I can relate to that, when asked how I am I tend to say “oh, you know, so so “ in my case it means sore and sorer!
I was asked that today and said...I'm on my feet....so that's good!
I often reply "well I'm alive, but I can't kick"! 😂💐
Excellent, basically we struggle most days and do what can on the other days....even though it`s still ticking away....but what I have thought about recently is how much older I am now to when I first got PMR (for my 60th birthday), heading for 68 this year, unbelievable!....takes away the what should be enjoyable retirement years....but must be positive that we will slay the dragon!....
I'm knocking 80! Can't believe I've lived this long!!!!😏 Oh well - they say only the good die young!!😀💃🕺🍾🍸🍷🥃🍺
in reply to Constance13
80 is the new 70 so I've heard. 🌻
Constance13 in reply to
With PMR, Poly Arthritis, High Blood Pressure and High Colesterol????
in reply to Constance13
Fingers crossed the PMR might go. I try not to think about them all at once 😂😂😂
in reply to Constance13
If I get to 80 I am going to start smoking, drinking and eating what I want. 😁😁😁
Constance13 in reply to
How did you guess????
in reply to Constance13
My best friend is nearly 84 (I am 57)...she smokes roll ups and has a glass of wine with her lunch everyday. She eats her scones, hot cross buns and. Liquorice all-sorts with impunity!
Constance13 in reply to
What else is there to live for except to enjoy yourself?
Noosat in reply to
No you won't, if you have PMR. I am 91, don't complain and look at each day as a precious gift. However, I am doing all I can to combat the PMR and stay as healthy as possible so that I can enjoy my days and my family and friends
in reply to Noosat
It's fun to think about but you are probably right once I get there if I am at all healthy I will want to stay that way. I am glad you get to enjoy life and family time - it's nice to know that at 91 you see each day as precious despite the PMR . Its my family weekend this weekend and I am going to rest before I drive down to them. That way I can enjoy time with them. 🌻🌻
👍
Manchild in reply to
Yeah, I told my wife if I’m terminal, bring me a dozen cream filled donuts and a carton of Marlboros.
in reply to Constance13
Don't knock anything myself C !!.... Not that I notice!...Till the bruises appear! ATB
Why don't you just use "sore and sorer" that'll confuse them.😂
Mine is slow & slower 😂
I'm learning not to pretend to be too well when with my nearest and dearest or they think I'm back to "normal" whatever that is!
That I sometimes find difficult...my OH after 7years doesn't always get it.....he sometimes says you were ok yesterday!.......no I wasn't I just didn't say anything!😱........
Mine says that as well. Such a silly thing to say to someone. Drives me mad.
My daughter would agree with you. When she calls me each morning, I tend to say "I'm fine," Her reply, "please tell me how you really feel, I can hear in your voice that it is not a particularly good day." We are extremely close, can tell each others moods etc. Whereas the boys, even though I know they love me, will take what I say at face value and, I think, they believe their Mum is indestructible.
Brilliant. I have had various health issues where I pretended to be well. Past 2 years I have let my closest family in more. But I have got to say it does make you feel like a hypochondriac if you don't pretend to be well. Just because most of us in society say ""fine thanks" when asked how we are.
That's fair enough - but NEVER say it to your doctor if you don't!!!!
in reply to PMRpro
Too late 😂😂😂 I have learnt to say " well I have come to you about X so not exactly fine"
Excellent!!!!!
If the doctor asks I answer "you tell me" (that's after a blood test)!
HeronNS in reply to
"How are you?" has as much meaning as, "How do you do?" I think we should start to ignore the question in the same way as we ignore the question in the old fashioned way of saying hello.
If asked how I am my usual answer is "could be better, could be worse"
I am constantly hearing "you look great". The other day I finally said "Looks can be deceiving". My general attitude to this whole illness thing is that no one likes a complainer, so I don't, even when asked (except for my husband).
Or "its the meds!"
Being perky can backfire. I hate to be grouchy and moaning.
Love that.
Isn't it difficult. Its partly because we feel GUILTY! When I told my G.P. how I dreaded trying yet another reduction from my current, optimum, dose she listened very attentively and then observed " You seem to feel guilty that you are still unwell." And she is right! My Rheumy has stopped putting PMR at the head of my hospital letters because he believes that resolves for most people in about 2 years. He still puts GCA because he believes that lasts longer. And yes, My G.P. is correct. I DO feel guilty and as though I should be over it by now. Thank fully my Rheumy is also a good listener and always sanctions an increase in steroids when the pain comes back.
The problem is the pred makes us look SO well with our chubby, hamster cheeks! I usually say "I'm up and I'm dressed....!"
Love your reply Louisa, l get told all the time how well l look and just say it's the pills.
I never actually got chubby cheeks, but I think they filled out a little, which made me look younger and healthier. So I always have got, "you look so well !"
I too get told "but you look great!", Which is my lovely grannies genes, she lived to 100 and was fabulous. My reply is usually, "it's the drugs n alcohol keeping me going", they laugh, I say, "I'm not joking", I'm not!
Yes it’s frustrating it’s not that you want to moan all the time or sympathy all the time. Just for people to realise that you can’t do certain things But if you don’t have it it is hard to know what we feel like
Thank goodness for this forum
I tend to say 'still taking the tablets'
Sometime I say... ‘I’m still breathing’ !
Agree
I read on a chronic pain sufferers blog that the one question every person with Chronic Pain hates is , " How are you?"
Why? Because you feel forced to say what other people want to hear.
I completely get that now , especially as it makes being ill so much harder when you have to start every conversation you have with a lie.
I've decided it's time to stop lying , it mightn't make other people happy , but it makes me feel a heck of alot better.
Here's to spilling the beans on what it's like to live with " The New Normal"!
Hugs , Bee xx
Ive just shocked a neighbour,how are you she asked, bloody awful I said, now I feel quite ashamed.
Don't you dare feel ashamed!!!!!!!!! Being honest is nothing to be ashamed of AND it gets so tiring saying "OK" or "Not too bad" !!!!! I think BLOODY AWFUL is how most of us feel at times and it has to be said at some point or you would explode!!!! Good on you!!! Big hugs xxxxx
Don't feel ashamed feel brilliant.
I bet when you first said it there was a buzz of relief because you didn't squash it in and told the truth.
Keep hold of that instant feeling instead , isn't it about time we all stopped hiding the truth so others feel better , we aren't well , we need support and thats a fact that deserves to be recognised .
Take care and never feel bad for telling people how you really feel xxx
Thanks don't feel so guilty now, it was just the look on her face
Maddening comment: 'You do look well!'
Unsaid (?) reply: 'yeah I may do but I feel terrible !!!'
Try thinking to yourself , " And you don't look stupid , so the saying looks are deceiving must be true!" Makes me smile😋😁😂😂😂
Yes!! What a brilliant poster!! X
I can so relate to all of this , A.... we look well due to the Preds , B …..1 speck of sun gives us a tan … so we look like we have just spent a few weeks laying on a sun bed some where nice and exotic with out a care in the world … every one says … you look so well … I have not seen you look as good as this for a few years ..then they ask how are you feeling... what do we say … I'm ok or I'm getting there , we even hide it from our other half's some times , well I do mostly due to feeling guilty about feeling ill when I look well, I want to hit the deck some days but still cook dinner , I have found that friends are dropping off a bit …. the long time face book ones that ask you to keep them up dated ?????? give them 2 months and they don't answer or no longer ask .. oo La what a complicated Malarkey we are experiencing .
take care all think of numeral Uno xx
Exactly! With strangers I’m more likely to say I’m ok, even if I’m not. Those closest to me know when I’m struggling (I’m comfortable to be real with them, and more of a skunk than a turtle). It feels good to be genuine and authentic as possible....if I had a cast on or something that was visible, I don’t think we’d grapple as much with this.
I've always said my favorite illness (if I have to have one) is a head cold because people can see from 10 feet away that you don't feel well without having to explain anything. A cast would fall under the same category.
Definitely!
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