Life is for living - I now get it...

Jean's carol concert post inspired me - i had a realisation at the weekend, you see. I made it to my big Italian family party on Saturday, having decided to ignore my qualms about norovirus, flu etc. I have been whittling on about this one a but -- but am SO close to my end of 6th and, hopefully, last chemo on 28th December that I just could not bear a delay - and my immunity is now at rock bottom, of course.

I was SO glad I did. I finally figured my lovely family couldn't be THAT germy! I imposed a general no kissing /hugging rule which was hard to do with that lot... just wasn't confident enough to risk it 100%... Resorted to dog training approach ("No! Sit!! Good girl! Who's a good girl den? YOU are!) which made it fairly silly and fun. I broke the rule for the hostess and the birthday boy of the evening. Well, you can't not kiss a handsome Italian, right? Even if he is a cousin!

I didn't eat (as no tastebuds), was bald as a coot (though I did put on quite a bit of slap and bling), felt a bit crappy, didn't drink my usual gallon or so of red wine (any actually), and had to go home a bit early but do you know? I felt so loved it was amazing. The family needed to see me as much as I did them.

My realisation from this? Facing cancer and a changed life means grasping that life properly despite it all. Right the way through chemo and operation I think I was far too reticent, stayed at home too much, and I won't do that again if, heaven forbid, it bites me a second time. It's not all about me either - participating with friends and family is something they need me to do too - not wait for them to take the visiting responsibility.

Living WELL with this beast is all about living life as fully as possible - not putting it all on hold.

Love

Sue

xxx

[citrine]

You are spot on Sue. I no longer do the "One day/sometime soon" thing. I try to make a firm date to meet up with people and do pleasurable things. OC really brought home to me the truth of the saying "Life is not a rehearsal, its the real thing".

Love Mary xx

[Hidden]

Great blog, Sue. So glad you enjoyed your evening. Happy Christmas and all the best for the last hurdle.

Love

Linda xx

[chrissy88]

Fab!! xxxxx

[Hidden]

Hi Sue,

If you can do it do it, life is definitely for living, best wishes x G x

[Archiebanana]

Hi Sue

What a great blog, so glad you had such a good time with your family.

Facing what we have to does change us completely, but so much for the good. I certainly appreciate a lot more and I am so much more calm than I used to be. I always seemed to be stressing over something, but life is too short!

Good luck for the 28th, it's so good to see the end in sight.

Have a lovely Christmas.

Love Linda xx

[michelle2 in reply to Archiebanana]

I know exactly where you are coming from...

[MaggyH]

Hi Sue

Good for you, I am sure your family were just as pleased that you made, it and to see you!

I am slowly starting to realise that I am still the same person that I was 4 months age before my OC was diagnosed, I think its a natural reaction to almost become a recluse and hide away, but actually you feel much better doing most of the things you used to do, in fact sometimes I find myself feeling normal again, and the more I do it the more normal I feel.

Have a great Christmas

Brenda

[Hidden]

Hi Sue,

I bet you are so pleased that you did go to the party. Family and friends need to see that you are as well as can be expected under the circumstances. I didn't allow this cancer to dominate my life, the first 8/10 weeks after diagnosis we were putting the finishing touches to our daughters wedding and that meant meeting lots of people. I even went to a colleagues hen party straight from chemo ( dept said it would be ok ) and we went to our caravan as many weekends as possible.

Keep at it, every day brings something different,

Have a great Christmas,

love Chrisxx good luck for 28th

[Madz]

Hurrah for going out and having a good time, I have only just started chemo and am very conscious when anyone coughs or sneezes near me but am determined to still have fun even if I have to compromise and your blog encouraged me on that path. I have anti bacterial gel in my handbag and use that as much as reasonable when out and about, remembering Annie's advice from her colds research chap - lots of hand washing!

Enjoy Christmas and good luck with your last sesh Amanda xx

[wendydee]

Wonderful, Sue! Sending you very best vibes for a good Christmas, a germ-free end of chemo, and many many more wonderful experiences as you recover. I'll let you into a secret...... You never lose that joy! It's one of the few benefits of the beast!

Love n hugs

Wendy xx

[Hidden]

Thank you all for lovely comments. Wishing ALL a very Merry Christmas and a New Year of more health and happiness!

Love, Sue

xxx

[MargaretJ]

What a lovely experience Sue! Like you I was very precious about infection first time around but last time I was more relaxed. My onc says the most likely source of infection is one's own hands! Now I just do lots of hand washing with anti bacterial hand wash and carry anti bac gel. I seem to keep pretty fit!

When you have finished with your handsome Italian cousin I would not mind a borrow! A good looking Italian could do a lot for my morale!

Happy Christmas! Good luck with the chemo!

Love Margaret xxxxxx

[Hidden in reply to MargaretJ]

Snort! He is unfortunately taken!!!

Have a good one - not too much effort and strain though!

S

xxxx

[MargaretJ in reply to Hidden]

I just fancied a quick ogle! My ultrasound was done by a female this time so I missed out on the dish who did the abdominal one, the biopsy and the drain! I am seriously in need of some really tempting eye candy! LOL!

No effort and strain but don't know if my grandsons will make it to London today. The rail line from Plymouth to Tiverton is closed!

Have a great Christmas!

M

[Jan76]

Well done Sue !

Get out there and enjoy what you want to when you want to do it ..its the only way to go !!

So pleased you had your family gathering as familes are our 'Rocks' ..do not know what I would have done with out hubby and the gang ....

Have a wonderful Christmas and heres to your last one on the 28th ..it will soon be all done xx

Take care and have fun xxx

Love Jan xxxx

[Whippit]

Dear Sue

Lovely blog. I'm so glad you went out and caught up with your lovely family even though you were a bit under par. Good luck for 28th. Well done for getting through all this.

May 2013 be healthy, happy and full of love and joy. xxxxx

Annie

[Hidden]

And for you too, Annie -- and all of you other wonderful ladies. I feel I have new friends, which has been a revelation and strength for me, this past few months. Thank you.

To a better and healthier 2013 for us all.

S

xxx