I met with my oncologist today for my 3mth review & I’m gutted because ‘it’s back’ not much but nodules on my peritoneum.
Not what I wanted to hear, they have discussed various treatment options to consider.
So I’ve had a good cry (probably not the last) & now trying to refocus again.
I’ve just told my brother & best friend but I can’t bear to tell anyone else yet too many questions, so I thought I’d just post on here because you are all better equipped to understand it all and just give me the gentle support this forum gives without the unending questions.
Hi Scotty22 , so sorry you find yourself back on treatment so soon, it's a horrible blow , I have started back last Monday new regime of carbo/calyx , feeling very tired but as long as we cling to the hope that this will work and give longer remission .... Stay strong in my thoughts and prayers 💐💐💐
Thanks Loren I wish you all the best too, I am starting to understand that we have to manage this cancer as opposed to getting rid of it! It’s a hard lesson to learn but we must keep on fighting xx
I’m sorry Lyndy that you’ve had the same news, I agree telling people is awful, I had a lot of support last year & I sort of don’t want to tell people it’s back I feel like I’ve failed which is ridiculous. I was so lucky to have cards & flowers & messages etc last year & I dont want it all again this year even though it was amazing I just want a normal life.
What a blow but you did it before and you can do it again. I found it much harder to cope emotionally with my first recurrence than with the original diagnosis so I really emphasise and sympathise. Once treatment started, like everyone, I just had to get on and deal with it. All I can do is send you love and a gentle hug. Be kind to yourself. Jo 🌻🌺🌼🌸🌹🌻🌺🌼🌸🌹
I truly feel your pain. I am in the same situation. It felt like someone kicked me in the stomach when I found out that my CT scan was not clean. I think that is one of the more devastating aspects of this disease. I am trying to think of it as diabetes or hypertension in that I will never be rid of it. I tell myself that it is there and once in a while it will “flare up”. It sucks and it’s ok to say it. Praying for us all. Keep fighting. That’s all we can do.
I have just finished six rounds of chemotherapy for my first recurrence. It was such a blow when my cancer levels started rising and it took two CT scans and a PET scan to locate it. I then went through further surgery before the chemo. It is doable so just keep fighting.
Hi Scotty, so sorry you are facing a recurrence. I hope once you decide on a course of treatment that it goes well. Having had two recurrences I can assure you that its possible to get through this and have a longer remission. Sending you a big hug, Kathy xx
I’m so sorry for your pain and it coming back. What a shitter frankly. You can tell or rant to us any time you like. We will support you. I felt exactly the same when mine recurred last year. It feels like a kick in the teeth.
Don’t worry about talking to anyone else just now, it’s vital you just rest and focus your energy on yourself. They can wait...
Once the shock settles down, you can start to make a plan of action and the consultant will help you. Once this plan starts rolling, you will have more to focus on.
Scotty, how can your Doctor be sure the nodules are active cancer tissue without a biopsy? I ask this because my after chemo scan showed what appeared to be 6 nodules! Even though my CA 125 had gone from over 1000 down to 9. My surgeon/oncologist told me he sees this frequently where what looks like nodules are actually clumps of dead cells. So, during my second surgery, to reverse colostomy, they biopsied all 6 nodules and NONE OF THEM WERE LIVE CANCER! They were ALL clumps of dead cells. So, go ask a few more questions about this before anyone tries to give you more chemo.
So sorry to hear your news - what a rollercoaster we are all on. Once it has sunk in I am sure you will find your strength and give it a good kicking again. Just read some of the wonderful stories of ladies who continue to beat reoccurrences and tell yourself that you are going to join their exclusive club.
I am sure you will get lots of love and support from your friends when you can face telling them but it is hard for us to understand how to live with this horror let alone them. However live with it we must so onwards and upwards lady you can do it (with a few natural tears on the way). Good luck and lots of love. xx
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