Bad tempered and very tired.

Bad tempered and very tired.

Cat is driving me mad, keeps jumping onto things and knocking everything down. Berry keeps whining - don't know why - he has been out constantly today. Hubby was doing pickles last night and left the mess for me to clear up. He got such a telling off, he actually washed up his breakfast things! Wonders will never cease.

I ache from head to foot - don't know if it is the cold I have or not and my knees are very wobbly, also have a pain in my hip and my shoulder is beginning to play up again despite the injection on the 18th November. I don't see the physio until 8th December.

Berry is keeping out of my way as I am shouting at him and Minnie has just had a smack for trying to pull holes in my new curtains.

I am so tired I can't keep my eyes open despite having several really good nights of sleep. Did finish off my Xmas shopping this morning and I think I walked a bit too far - 100 yards instead of 50! Was very glad to get back to my car and get home for a welcome coffee.

Weight has gone up again so feeling really down about that - it's up and down like a yoyo and can't seem to shift it at all at present.

This wretched disease - I do so hate it. Been in tears this morning thinking about my dad who died 5 years ago and my beloved Lab Bessie who died 4 years ago. I know I have the other 2 but I loved her so much. And I do miss my father to talk to. He would have understood how I feel, being a pharmacist with a lot of medical knowledge gained in the RAF.

Will shut up now as feel really weepy again and I absolutely hate feeling like this. Will try to have a snooze this afternoon and see if that helps.

LavendarLady x

20 Replies

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  • Oh poor Lavender!, gosh your whole family including you very talented.

    You are obviously feeling very rotten thinking of the loss of your dear father and Bessie. she was obviously a lovely dog and perhaps she more of a personal companion than the other two dogs?

    I think the damp cold weather causes havoc with our joints, I think the bad wind might be upsetting your pets today?.

    Hope you have a nice snooze and hope you feel better, pm if you like If I can help in any way

    Alison xx

  • Hi Lavendar lady

    I am so sorry you are feeling like this ;-(

    Today i am having a 'good' day, i'm about to inject my enbrel and chill out in front of the tv having done my shopping and some work. But i do REALLY understand how horrible it can all feel sometimes. The one thing you have to hold on to with all your mite is that we never know what is just around the corner and i promise you will have a 'good' day again soon ;-)

    Hope is what gets us through those dark days!

    Rest well and hope you are feeling better later

    Ella xx

  • GM Lavendar Lady, I love your name! I understand completely how you feel. Bless your sweet heart. I do pray that you will feel better soon. Dealing with this horrible condition is enough, but then to deal with colds, stress, extra chores. It has a tendency to get to the best of us. I hope you have a wonderful nap and will awake a little more refreshed. If I could I would wave a magic wand and take all away from you and the others. I really wish I could. Rest well my friend. Linda

  • Hi Lavendar Lady.

    Sounds as if you are having a horrible day.

    From reading your blogs you sound such a positive lady but this awful disease does get us all down from time to time.My escape is reading a good book.It works sometimes.

    Hope this is just a temporary blip for you.Enjoy your snooze.Hope you feel brighter tomorrow. xx

  • I think we all are suffering at the moment. Its damn hard losing a parent,i lost both of mine 11/12yrs ago. It was one of the worst times of my life. I miss my mum the most as we were so close.I have had to go through this ra journey without her knowing anything about whats happening to me. I had a good howl this morning as well,it helps to relief the pressure.

    Your are a wonderful lady lavender, we are all sending our love your way.

    Sylvia. xxx

  • Poor you LavenderLady please take care and i hope tomorrow is better for you. I've lost both parents too and know that when I'm at a low ebb the loss is always felt that much harder. Big hug to you (((()))))

    Tilda T x

  • Hi LL,

    So sorry you having a sad day, hopefully it will pass. My dad died in 1993, and I miss him every day, so I totally understand how you feel.

    This is a miserable disease, I had my 6 week check up post op, so advised to gradually weight bear. Its a nightmare and surgeon says 6 MONTH recovery...

    Funnily enough no sign of RA on my tendon, when analysed whatever that means..

    I hope you feel happier tmaro. :)

    Ps. My dogs are being very irritating too!!

    Gina.

  • Oh you poor thing LL :-(

    You need to wrap yourself up warm and rest until this horrid cold passes. I'm sure that all the sore joints, pain and general misery are caused by your poor body struggling to cope with the cold virus. Emotional pain is near to the surface when we're unwell - one thing that can help is stroking a warm blooded mammal (husband or dog???) there is an exchange of infra-red rays that is healing for both humans and animals:-)

    My dogs are still being naughty - I blame the high wind that we have here in the north, it seems to whip them up into a frenzy!

    Sleep well and deeply,

    Cece x

  • Thank you everyone for your lovely thoughts and support.

    I did go into work today although they said I should not have done but did not feel like sitting at home feeling sorry for myself. I had a trainee with me so that was interesting showing her the ropes etc.

    Still got dreadful back ache and aches down the legs and shoulder. Animals better behaved today when I got home and Berry very pleased to see me.

    MTX today so that might help and Enbrel tomorrow although the Nurofen I took yesterday afternoon did nothing at all.

    Going to sit with a heat pad on my lower back as that usually does help.

    Thanks Again. LavendarLady x

  • Hi LL

    Hope you feel better soon!

    I and others have been where you are and you are in our thoughts

    Have a pain free evening

    Sci x

  • Well darn, Lady, I hate knowing you are feeling so down. I see alot of us feeling like that, with the extra pressure of Christmas coming and wanting to do things with and for the home and family.

    It really does help, make a difference if the sun would shine long enough to be out in it. Though just seing it out there can be uplifting.

    It is frustrating to recall the way we used to do things, compared to now. Breaks my heart that I can't do the same with my grandchildren I have to try to not dwell on these things, because I can't change them. We can only do something about today and tomorrow. I am constantly trying to keep my weight in control! Yoyo, yes./ So many days go by and I know I have been way under the allowed calories and the weight will not go away!! I just want to loose 15-20 lbs, but gees, it just won't move. My Dr. says I probably have gotten into "starvation mode" and the body is protecting what it still has. Yeah well, how can I kick it in the butt and get it to let loose of a few more lbs.?

    Hoping tomorrow the sun will shine for you, and if it doesn't, turn on all the lights in the house and pretend. Have a good night's sleep. Loret in USA

  • Hi Loret, thanks for your thoughts. My cold has really come out now

    and had a very bad night with coughing and all bunged up so went into the spare room so as not to disturb hubby.

    Had a lovely hot bowl of porridge this morning with some grapes on top - very warming.

    It is clear blue sky here but has rained in the night. The wind has dropped and it seems a little warmer! And the sun has come out - been into the garden and the fresh air was lovely after all the gale force winds we have had.

    Hope you are keeping well. LavendarLady x

  • Hello again, Just have to ask, what is porridge? Oatmeal? Cream of Wheat?

    or something else. I enjoy having oatmeal like that, with cinnamon and raisens.

    By the way..cinnamon is predicted to be anti-inflammatory, we're supposed to have a teaspoon a day. I figure 6 Oatmeal/raisen cookies should do it. With hot chocolate, or a glass of milk :) Let's try it!

  • Hi Loret, porridge is oatmeal, I cook it with skimmed milk and usually add grapes or a chopped up banana to it. Very delicious with cream as well. Very warming on a cold winter's morning too and keeps me going until lunch time.

    Your cookies sound good - I think these are small cakes? Or are they biscuits? I like the sound of the hot chocolate as well. The best I ever had was in Portugal made with real chocolate melted and topped with cream. Very fattening but gorgeous. LL x

  • I think our cookies are what you call small cakes. Biscuits are not sweet, buttery, crusted, rounds, or drop free-form.

    Cookies are endless variations. Many basic doughs, to which are added raisens, chocolate chips, nuts, candied fruits, oatmeal, brown sugar, prett6y much whatever you'd like.

    The doughs are different too, like Peanut butter cookies, chocolate like cocoa, added to the mix, or just butter cookies or sugar cookies.

    Would you like me to send a couple recipes for you to try? I'm sure you willl fall in love! With the cookies!!

  • Hi Loret, yes please, a couple of cookie recipes would be lovely. You can send them via the messaging section or actually, others on the blog might like to see them as well! LL x

  • Sure thing! Let me go find some good ones and I will be back here in a couple hours. Have to go pay bills!! XXXXLoret

  • awh big hugs, this made me sad to read, and i hope you feel more cheery soon, its very sad to lose a loved one and dog are like our children xxx

  • Thank you Laney. Do feel better today. LL x

  • LL, I never got the chance to get back here, to post cookie recipes, will for sure tomorrow! Loret

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