I despair of myself. I have such a short fuse due to everything taking much more of an effort than before I got RA. I am 53 and a single parent with a 10 year old son. I never get 'time off' as his dad chooses not to see him. By the end of the day I am stuffed, and if I have overdone things (like this weekend having to drive to other side of Scotland to pick up a trailer) I get overwrought. I end up drinking a whole bottle of wine, as opposed to just a glass or two, and feel even worse the next day. Apparently alcohol makes you depressed. I am overweight due to not being able to exercise and I used to be super fit and healthy. Any exercise I do just ends up with me becoming totally exhausted for days. Can't keep up with everything, parking fines, bank accounts, and everything is so out of control. Of course it doesn't help that my son and I were reduced to living in a touring caravan due to his father destroying us financially. It looks like we are to be given a council flat this week. Thank God. Not nice to be homeless at Christmas. However, dreading having to move all of our things into the new flat as I will have to lift and move so many heavy things and will end up wrecked. I take four salazapyrin tablets and one meloxicam every day, for the past ten years since my son was born by emergency caesarian. I think the physical trauma to my body was what triggered the RA.
Irritability and fatigue: I despair of myself. I have... - NRAS
Irritability and fatigue
Liz I can completely understand and empathise. You are doing so much and you are exhausted. You are so tired that the only relaxation that you can get is probably the wine which leads to more problem the next day. Its such an easy bad habit to get into and I know. I have had to really stop it as i was beginning to look forward to the wine more and more.
Are you on any dmards? Have they tried to put you on to metx? The stress of money worries must be making your symptons worse. Are you getting any financial help for your disability. Thank goodness you are getting a house next week, if you can't get anyone to help you with the moving I wonder if any of the local volunteer bureau people can help you to get moved.
I have the same weight issues as you due to no proper exercise and I have managed to deal with the irritability by using antidepressants, I was exhausted with work, housework, children and life in general and was so angry with everyone.
Do you see your consultant regularly, it may be time to increase your medication or even get some better antiinflammatories.
You have had things very rough, take care of yourself.
Dear Mads, you know exactly what I am going through. I have an appointment with the GP on 28th Jan, I just hope that this time he takes me more seriously. I look ok, my hands are not twisted with swollen knuckles. But I feel this disease battering at mydoor every day, waiting for me to forget to take my pills for even a day, when it will enter my body and do it's worst.
Oh liz the 28th january is such a long time away, I don't want to go on but you need something more to stop the pain and get started on something to help your mood that doesn't have side effects - I actually got an emergency appointment with a stand in gp who was much better than the usual one, she ruled out a few antidepressants and decided that citaloprram was prob the best one. I read all your former blogs and really admire your determination and grit. you are one hell of a woman, just keep fighting to get a bit of proper treatment.
Yes, might ask the doc for a different type of anti-depressant as the first lot made me feel like a zombie after a week so I stopped taking them. Scared of them now. I hate taking pills as it is and only remember to take the DMARDS (yes) as I feel the pain starting if I don't. Depression is more insidious and invisible even to the sufferers.
HI, I would contact the CAB to help you with your finances before you get too bogged down with it all. They will help you to put things into a plan so that you will not get into too much debt, also they could help with benefits etc. Good Luck with your move and keep in touch, take care.xx
Thanks Georje, I am already being helped by CAB, but they cannot help with court fines for traffic offences as they don't have legal advisers due to cut backs. This leaves the 'man/woman on the street' without any recourse to help or advice of a legal nature as legal aid is so restricted now and solicitors won't bother with minor offences. So this plays on my mind as the district court for the offence is in Dorset and I live in Glasgow now, so it's too far away for me to attend and as a single parent, I cannot take my son out of school during term time to take him with me. I also cannot afford the fares for travel and overnight accommodation. Nightmare, but no compassion from courts.
You have such a lot on your plate. I hope that once you are in your flat life will be a bit easier, and that may help with your RA symptoms as stress makes us so much worse. Do you claim DLA? If you can get that it would help you financially. I hope things get easier for you - roll on 2013.
Dotty
Hey Dotty, I am worried that I wont qualify for DLA as I was told by a previous GP in Dorset that my RA would not qualify and that I would be seen as a 'sponger' ?
It's worth looking at the criteria, and seeing if you meet them - you won't know unless you try. Try discussing it with the people at CAB, who are the experts at filling in the forms. Anything that can help you get on your feet financially would be worth it. Good luck xxxx
Poor you - lots of sympathy from me too. Was that photo taken a long time ago then because you certainly don't look overweight - you look very attractive and I'm sure you are. You are just knackered because of your circumstances and who wouldn't be? I do hope you get the council flat you deserve it. Tilda x
Hey Tilda, apols for not responding to your kind reply. Been v.busy moving into new flat. The photo was taken 3 years ago. Since then I have ballooned in weight. Yes, it is most probably my circumstances which have contributed to the overeating and overdrinking hence the weight gain.
Sorry to hear that you are feeling so low, do try to see your GP for antidepressants, you said the last lot made you feel like a zombie but was this because you were so exhausted. I was on them last year ( although reluctant to admit I needed them and changed them once) and found that they really helped after a time (they do take time to work and it is not a quick cure).
I found when I admitted I had a problem after several years of a really poor sleep pattern I fell asleep anywhere and everywhere and well rested means more able to cope with the problems of life.
Hope you get things sorted soon and life starts to feel better. and remember that the folks on here are here to support you.
take care and gentle hugs crisxx
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