Answer = I don't know, but i have no choice ;-(
I am in desperate need of some kind words of support from you guys....you are the only ones who know how
Ok so on 19th April i had my right ankle fused as part of a year plan to get both fused and to get walking better. I was doing well...i felt still a little pain in the ankle but was seriously impressed at my progression. I went for my pre-op appointment for the left ankle on friday and this is where it ALL went wrong!
I had x-rays, saw my surgeon and he told me that a screw had worked its way loose in the right ankle and that was why i was still getting some discomfort in it, he said that we would have to operate to put it back in on 9th aug and wait a little while longer to fuse the right ankle.
Disapointed but in agreement totally i went home. A few hours later i began to get very very bad pain in my ankle.. (pshyco sematic i asked myself?), but i was sure something was wrong, something bad, i told my family but quite rightly they felt sure it was nothing major as i had just had x-rays done and all that was wrong was the loose screw!? In monday morning i thought that i was sure dispite re-assurance that there was something new wrong so i took myself to my GP. He too was unhappy so sent me to have another x-ray.
Turns out my ankle that was operated on 3 months ago, with a loose screw, now has 4 fractures in!!!!!!!!
I'm now in full cast and they're operating on me on 9th aug.
For the 1st time in my life of arthritis i feel defeated, deflated and i really dont know where to turn to find the one thing that has always kept me going, which is hope.
I know the single most un-useful enotion to have is self pity, but thats what i am feeling, and i really dont know how to get out of it.