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my own fault, but fun but the inner battle goes on

well over did it last night , went out to a new club with a new friend and she mad as a hatter , we had fun danced a bit and then some man grab me and tried to get to jive lol. well I tried as swept up in having fun a laugh and my worst thing trying ot be normal and not spoil the fun for my friend , so I danced knowing my hip and back hurt , and my knee nearly gave way but did I care... no. lol. And today both knees are kliling me my feet burning and my back and hands hurting , have taken my top dose of morphine MST that I have tried not to take for a while as trying to cut down hopefully but now and again like today had to go large , with my anti in flams I hope to be able to go out later to the party in the park we have on out sea front today ,, but worry there will be no where to sit when i need so may not go . may just sit in my garden and relax .. but I do not want to miss the fun . There is also a carnival in a nearby part of town , may to that s may not be soo busy ..... all these things i want ot do but am hurting so much i doubt I will enjoy them or come home as soon as I gethere . Am going alone so just may not bother ... which is the story of my life lol, endd up at home resting and only thinking of what I would be doing if did not have this . and after 40 years of pain should be used to it ,, and I am .... just the odd day it hits home with a vengence ... confused yes . but nothing new lol. Hope you all enjoy the loverly weather we are having for a day or two. xxx

4 Replies

Pam, you had a great time last night and your paying for it today,but remember in years to come you will remember last night and it will bring back happy memories for you. Don't you have a scooter,i have one and though i hate the thing i wouldn't be without it. Couldn't you get a taxi down to the party in the park and then you could sit on the grass and enjoy it that way.

Love sylvi.xx


I agree with Sylvi, its the great nite that counts. You will recover from that nite to go onto have more. If your able to go out tonite! Grab every opportunity you can!!

Wishing you (((hugs))) and that the meds work, enabling you to go out tonite.

Cheers Joanne x


sounds like you had a great time! ' Well jel ' as they say. Don't feel bad about going out and having fun, but don't feel bad about just chilling in the sun too. Can't you sit on the beach with an ice cream? Take a camera xoxox


Am off out tonight after resting all day and dosing up on the meds .. did pop to town quick but no where to aprk it so busy .... do have a mobility scooter well I have the battery and the scooter is in my sons ex girlfriends garage ......... not easy to get . but will have to I think, as driving is getting hard too.... but going to have fun and thanks all, as have two hos appts and blood test next week and waiting for my appt for the mew treatment .... so will prob be too tired for much then .... toodle pip see ya later have a loverly eve ,,xxxx


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