where were we oh that was it no no no well those with power to hold said no shes ok to carry on (you must be joking says i told to be qutte or b arrested shes winning knows how to soft soap ff 2 hours later she says just going to shop eggs and bread me bacon her get your self oh thank you daughter well hes a veggie so off she totters there back then out again faster than grease lightning here we go ring ring yes l o can you come and pick up your daughter up at bench bottom street (this is anew one ) partner goes and shes bladders WELL ITS ALL NIIGHT NOW UP FALL BANG NORMALLY HEAD CIGS FOOD WHATEVERS TO HAND trying to find number of who sent her home partner wont take BOOZE it from her or barracade room so she cant get out I AM NOT HAVING THIS SO I MADE THEM AII RING POLICE 111 101 HELPLINES 999 SAY ITS NOT AN ARRESTABLE OFFENCE still waiting 101 rest he[pera chatting to helpers i am GOIng tu get[ a sack and throw her river oh oh who is here all dolled up but her ladyship skirt up backside and well guess yes commando out she goes up the street train station there with my hat my coat hanging about time to wake up DAD worse than ever get her home 46 yrs old easier said than done and by this time she like the devil incarnate upstairs she goes the boys turn up THE SECTION MOB AGAIN i said she not coming back here she is a danger to herself and others said its not up to them well i said she cant come with me right will you put her up in hotel yes ok 12 OCLOCK MIDNIGHT RING RING ETC can we bring her back the partner took over b4 i exspired so we have had 2 normal nites we have kept in touch but she pulled another flanker she asked for jeweliery box keys within so he as change all locks but what gets me is she is on her own that lot was only a snippet of what went on and i wont say what she did to me but by doing it she cant come near she hung herself but i am ok down there won,t
sewing up ladies do you think anything to do with menipause ???????????
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pauluk60
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average age of menopause process beginning is reported to be 51 but we’re all different.
The average age of menopause (i.e. last period) is 52 but symptoms of peri-menopause (which is when I felt worse) can start well before that. Mine started mid-40s but I felt pretty awful from 47 onwards.
sylvi she never caused any major probs but she was complicated she never grew up so i will have to be carer there i have witnessed an awe inspiring devotion by her partner hes the one who took the brunt of things and she even broke him that he asked for help so i got to fix things haven't i
I`m so sorry about your situation but you need to look after yourself now. Changing the locks and ignoring her when she`s acting up is better than continually bailing her out. She`s a middle aged woman and needs to sort herself out. There are no medications, rehab programmes, therapy etc that can cure her alcoholism. She can only cure it herself by having the will and determination to succeed in overcoming it. The stats say majority of fully recovered alcoholics did so without any help including AA. Some alcoholics said they didn`t like AA as they felt it wasn`t helpful to be sat in a room with a bunch of people whining about their problems. Some said it helped them to connect with others in a similar situation but everyone is different.
It`s not the job of the police and paramedics to be dealing with alcoholics as it`s a waste of their time and resources. They`re not trained nor equipped to deal with it. Police are for crime and paramedics are for medical emergencies and being drunk on the street includes neither.
Let her get on with it no matter how hard it is. She is pulling everyone down around her. Even if they section her and put her on some rehab programme (if they`re still doing that on the NHS) the likelihood of success is not high according to the stats. Watching documentaries like the recent Panorama one about a mental hospital near Manchester is horrifying to watch as many of the staff were abusive and horrible. The patients got worse not better as there isn`t the money and resources to cope anymore as the NHS collapses. The staff are given little training and are very short staffed to unsafe levels. The patients suffer terribly. I`m sorry it`s not uplifting but it is what it is. No point in pretending it`s going to get better anytime soon.
Celtic Celtic please dont be so hard i have to believe surely one of the coppers said he dealt with about ten a day troubled peeps Manchester area have loads of a/as type things and they have special units for sectioning i assure you had 3/4 lots come to house and all took her away to be brought back OK later so what miracle they worked i dont know because after another 3/4 hrs in a mess again
oh dear. This is so very hard for you. If it’s out of character, yes it could be something do with menopause or peri menopause. You can go through the menopause at any age - I was 34. Some ladies have no symptoms, some have terrible symptoms.
I’m an admin on my friends peri menopause Facebook group. It has over 50,000 members and some ladies on there are having a terrible time. Whatever it is, she sounds terribly unhappy.
Can you persuade her to go to the GP and go with her? Does she behave like this all of the time or is it sporadic? Whatever ‘it’ is, she needs help and so do you as this is effecting everyone around her.
I am so sorry she is putting you through all this. Unfortunately no treatment or rehab will work till she accepts herself she has a problem. I agree completely with everything Celticdancer says. You have done what you can, but you need to focus on your own health. She is a grown adult, who at present professionals clearly feel is capable of making her own decisions, although the rest of society might not agree with them. However whilst she is seen to have capacity there is little you can do. The sad thing is in these situation, the alcoholic doesn’t see the damage their doing to others. I would take a step back from her life, and focus on yourself, or you risk suffering health wise from the stress of all this. Please take care of yourself 🤗
hi maureen i just want to get to Monday hopefully and this plan they have got for her then i will back off until needed iam slowly grinding her down bye phoning help lines and keep repeating what she does she HATES it she keeps wanting to have go when i do that so lets see what happens Monday ta for caring all of you
I’m so sorry to read of your situation, but you need to look after yoursel. Your daughter is an adult and needs to want to give up alcohol to be successful. I think it’s time to change your locks and think of your own health, easy for me to say, I know.
Cut backs have a price that gies far deeper than money. We live in a country that blows billions on the latest weapons or political itch, but whan it comes to helping people's needs lol
The police are only there to puch ths latest political agenda not protect us or help us. So we have to work things out for ourselves.
I feel terrible for you, dealings with drug addiction is like banging your head against a wall. You are stuck until they want to help themselves. You can't lock her in, at one time you might of been able to get her sectioned but care in the community saw the end to that one ( pretty much)
For your sake you cant keep bailing her out, try looking to see what if any help is local to you. Reach out yo others who are going through similar problems.
hi tourk there is bucket loads of help near us but wont co operate yes old style here straight jacket padded cell and break her bu not going to get that and if you try it your locked up
This is the problems you cant help someone unless they want to help themselves. Any drug addiction takes away the person you knew. But alcohol is one of the worst.
Ive lost to many friend's to alcohol. For myself I started smoking cannabis instead but their was a time where alcohol had me.
Since then times when I've drunk I've always made sure to have one day where i didn't. Anyone who claimes not to have a drink problem I challenge them to go for a day, just 24 hours without a drink. You wont beleave how many times ive heard them say, i dont need to, i dont have a drink problem...
hi tourk yes been there myself a few lost years so do i blame myself well my state of was b4 kids were born so i feel little bit blameless ok thanks feel better now at home i got very very tired were i was hallucinating very strange
Its more often it's genetics than childhood. Alcohol addiction effects people from all cultures and backgrounds. People might use how they where brought up as an excuse but mostly we are responsible for our own addictions.
I know someone whos father was an abusive drunk ( short version) they had a terrible childhood. But as an adult they only have the occasional drink they cant stand drunks and certainly would never be one.
How have things been for you over the past few days
ok tourk like you say my old fella was a pain violent aggressive a---hole until i sogged him i am taking ok because listening to her she recognizable close and sounds a lot stronger and if she talking to someone well perfect puts it down beware shes after someone with looks that could kill
You may not like what I’m going to say Paul but it's intention is from a caring perspective. Your posts about your daughter clearly aren't helping you or her & given the frequency anything being suggested can't be either. Under their guidelines NRAS ask that off topic don't make up the majority of our posts.
I sympathise, I really do, but as others have suggested you need to take care of you & your wife's health. Ultimately it's you we care about & how we can help you.
if i had my way this would be done and dusted nomore the way the rules play out are prolonging it sos if its getting on peeps nerves sorry but the can bypass it sure dont have to poke noses in and carry on with there posting if gotten admin will tell me no intetion of taking room over could with header to non ra and lets the gods of ra carry on
Im so very sorry you're going through this & wish i could offer some advice, my nan was an alcoholic & we had many many times where shed just go off drunk & be found in someone's garden injured or semi conscious by the police, she even spent time in a mental hospital Mondays to Friday's coming home for the weekends to 'dry out' .
I was her favourite & tried threatening her that shed never see me again but nothing worked, we used to find bottles of whiskey full & empty hidden around the house & even gave the local shops a photo of her asking if theyd refuse to serve her but, shed still get hold of it, we were lucky (as such) that she was never violent.
Youd think nowadays with mental health being so prominent thered be something available to help.
I agree with most of the posts , you need to look after yourself first. Addicts cannot get better or stop their addiction till they admit they have a problem. There are lots of groups and services for different addictions. Not everyone can get out of being addicted but admission of a problem is the first step forward. Hope your daughter sees the way forward soon then you may be able to support her to get to the none addictive way of life Every best wish.
ta Katie her partner pat said he will let her back in and support her as theirs no drink-inking/violence he is convinced COVID as something to do with it
Hope your daughter is still doing well today and yourself . These crisis are hard to cope with I understand why you feel you must be there but cannot discuss on a public site. Is there anything your daughter likes that might distract her till help is available, but don't be too soft or it might give her the wrong impression. Forget causes she needs to face up to the fact she has a problem that needs sorting , but she is the only one who can make it better with help of course, she needs to know she is not alone and want to get better. Believe me there will come a day when she accepts her problems and hopefully faces them and comes out the other end a better person for her experience if only for the sake of those who do love her.
hi Katie why cant i post it would not bother me if someone in a slimier position looked for help in fact i would love help if i can kate they take my daughter away assess her their is nothing for me no letter phone number no explanations Nothing surely thats not right oviouslynot a lot of peeps been through something like this not blaming any one but to no explanation after 3/4 hospital visit in a week if you think different tell me why i want to UNDERSTAND whats going on
Hello again , One of the reasons is because your daughter is an adult they have to deal with her personally or her doctor if they feel she is not able to comprehend herself . The only way you can be involved is contact your own doctor and tell them you are getting stressed and they may be able to help you. Its the data protection issues gone mad. Don't get me wrong I do not agree with next of kin being ignored but have been that way many times with my late husband and I did live with him. If your daughter gives permission for you to be told then that's different. But your daughter must be informed before any treatment can be given. At present the NHS is very stressed and many are not getting the best treatment this is a suggestion , do you have a local MIND centre they can help with the emotional stress for you or your daughter or you could contact the samaritans for help . Even if it is only a chat a problem shared is a problem halved.
hi katie thanks got it now she wont give me permission not yet anywy is same for partner well i am well scratching head a bit as to whats happened and i think its me she never wanted to let me down and getting done fo drink driving made her mind blow with court probation etc etc also to much for her covid nurse all together bang only thing i can see
Hi getting done for drink driving is not a big deal for many just a way of life these days. Its just inconvenient for the person who losses their licence. I hope she did not injure anyone. There are far worse things happening in the world to concern ourselves with. Lots of children do not get on with there parents and are worried the parents feel let down. None of us are perfect.
hi katie i think from my family point of view she really loved her car and needed it for work purposes and the weight of court pressure probation and threats of jail no she did not hurt anyone
Sorry for delay in reply was busy with others that needed my input. We can't all cope with such pressures can we some are better at it , glad she did not hurt anyone or herself , its just the emotions running wild. Hope you are all feeling calmer today and getting things sorted now the weekend is over . The car can I expect be replaced in time but it will take a long time to get over the court bit. Take care and every best wish as always.
hi katie thanks story so far she was taken into care put in travelodge over weekend but got herself thrown d/d then went missing on me but in touch by phone informed powers that b who tracked today but wont tell me but said she is safe supposed to be meeting today as to her treatment waiting hear from them
no damaged to car just tried reading my posts you lot are for trying to help gets to gibberish sometimes its no wonder they found my English teacher talking to herself we got to lighten up i think things are happening behind the scenes would not like their job rules rules hog with them
I agree with NMH and Celtic Dancer and Maureen Gibson and just wanted to say it is a sad situation but at what point do you let her take responsibility for her own actions ? All the while you chase around looking for answers she has you at her back but in reality she must stand alone. I'd say that looking for a cause is pointless and will drive you mad whilst making no difference to her. Why not just stop the immense and pointless chasing and let her face up to the situation as it may be that you're actually with the best of motives prolonging the issues. I wish you well but think you might be empowering her in her self destructive actions as she knows your there to help pick up the pieces. Perhaps its time to say no and stop as you do have the rest of your family to consider as well. Tough love maybe?
hi medway sometimes you got to be in the thick of it to get a feel of her situation only a day now and just talked to her so were ticking along will we get there in one piece not 100% sure lets see whats keeping me going me old muckers from agecroft colliery they taught me so well a generation of good working class people helped me with my life at bad stage thanks lads it payed off also family and friends
sorry jackie you are right but it seems to only idea i had its quite difficult to see through the emotion i will take the telling off with best intentions and no hate or bad feeling there seems to interest and will stop when i get her the correct help she needs which should start Monday hopefully but i got to get her to MONDAY if i had not intervened there would have been a body i will go all out to stop that but when you get the powers that be doing silly things and saying shes an adult when oviously is not in charge of herself you would not JUST GIVE UP when for some unknown reason she is doing this why dont they back me up i will take full responsibility for her but cant take her home with me could not trust her but for one officer to be with me to help after you see how many have come and gone saying yes your RIGHT BUT SHES AN ADULT i would not walk out/away from anyone who you see struggling like this i had her within my grasp but they took away and put on own in a place she doest know WHY IT WOULD ONLY BE FOR FOUR DAYS and maybe keep me with her in her treatment bang uptodate and get her back on track is there something WRONG WITH THAT sorry if its called a rant so be it i am looking for answers with the HELP OF PROFESSIONALS who seem hog tied by rules one more day but she is MISSING WRECKED TRAVELODGE I HAVE BEEN TOLD SEE WHAT I MEAN me and i am a helper could have stopped that i know peeps come here for their specific health probs i tried other forums and to be honest this one seems to the most helpful (nowt like a bit of buttering up) so no matter what is its heads down till monday and hopefully out of your hair thanks to those who have backe/listend and given me advice surely we can help each other in difficult times MANY MANY THANKS TO THOSE WHO DO PAUL DOREEN FAMILY BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
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