my familys story

my familys story

I want to write this story as I want people to see and read it ,my partner and I have two older children 11 years boy and 15 year old girl we have been together 16 years and in 2009 my partner came down ill after working all his life as self employed bricklayer one Monday afternoon he came back home dropped his tools and said I'm done I cant do it any more well to cut long story short after many doctors and appointment he was diagnosed with chronic pancritus he suffers a lot with chronic pain and lack of digestion he also suffers from depression and anxiety to which makes him very withdrawn when living in our old house we were subjected to anti social behavior this was because with my partner being ill he does not work and looks after the children running them to and from school the narrow minded people hated that we were a quite family and targeted us causing stress on my partners health it got that bad that we decided after living in our family home for 13 years to up sticks and move we found a exchange with someone who wanted our area and we wanted some were quite for my partner in 2014 my self kids and partner moved into our bigger quieter house at first for the first year it was great getting to know the locals I got a job in the local care home working the night shifts so I was there for my partner in the day time but I started to get terrible pain in my feet hands knee and one night I couldn't walk my manager told me to get to the bloody doctors I was after a lot of tests "dignoseied" with rumotiod arthritis had a week of therapy and then got tablets given I'm ok still have pain still flares but my partner Is amazing helping me, after we had been in the house for a while other people started moving out and we got some others moved in I due to discrimination moved job and still a carer still work nights but for a much better company one night I was putting my head down to rest before a night shift and we had a knock on the door I heard the words your car and been smashed well we all shot up and went out side to a mess the car across the road had rolled down the hill our street and ended up in our side door of our car the peoples car it was came out saying at first they didn't know why as we were new to the street and both poorly they said they would pay for the damage to the car so we agreed (stupid) it was £450 pounds of damage and we ended up getting £100 off it after that we already had a drive dug out but it was mud on the night of the crash we had many of our neighbours tell us it was our fault the car got hit as it should be off the road onto the drive so after that my partner and my daughter got together and graveled our drive one morning when my partner and I came home from me doing a night shift we saw a old man lying on the floor under a car we didn't know what had happened but he was covered in blood we rushed from the car and he said he been attacked by a dog that dog was owned by the same people who had left there handbrake off there car and rolled into ours we had to call the police as the dog was running loose the old man had pushed his dog under the car to protected it while we were there the dog came round again it was a Japanese akitta massive we had to make a human shield around the man well after that day and these people have caused us nothing but trouble they live in a row of three houses that all know each other so they are what I call keyboard warriors who have nothing better to do then cause trouble for other we were then shortly inundated with letters of complaint from our housing association saying that we had made alterations to our house which we never we just filled a hole with gravel anyway after all the complaints were dealt with and the housing association approved our driveway , we now as we use the drive are constantly getting blocked in from our neighbours across the road this has cause missed hospital appointments ,me to have to pay £ 8.00 for a taxi into work its a living nightmare we cant have car on road as it gets smashed we do right thing and put it on the drive we get blocked in re see pictures we are at the end of our tether as they are restricting disabled people from getting mobile and in and out of there house we have tried talking to them which resulted in them moaning that we have a cat and saying that if we keep our cat off there garden they will let us park on our drive which has not worked well we have tried as we now keep the cat in most days hence ive got no paint on my door frames its getting my partner down now as his health and depression is a struggle most of the time anyway without this added stress I don't know what I want to come of me writing this as at the moment we have no drop kerb but do have three years to get it put in we just cant afford it I'm trying my best to keep working its hard but not being able to get your car in and out is just adding to the pressure for me and my partner and we just don't know what to do bearing in mind that when these people in picture built there drive we moved our car well out of the way and picked up all there sand bags that blow over the road to our car we never said anythink about this we have talked to the council and the police but they wont help what your views

29 Replies

  • i know its a long post but it a chore reading it try living lol xx

  • Its a long post could you shorten it to salient points as I'm not sure what it is your asking really. I would say one thing, you say you swapped so presumably have a landlord if so talk to the landlord. Do you have a dropped kerb ? I think you need to talk to building control as without it not sure you'd have the right to access your house by crossing the pavement. Anyway, I don't know but the local PCSO might be able to talk to you and the neighbours as well.

  • I know its a long post to read but we live this nightmere but what I was asking is why have no one got any manners any more

  • If you are a council tenant see if there is an anti social behaviour unit or try to see a solicitor at your local citizens advice unit. Keep a record of what is happening to you so it is easier to make your case to the council or your social landlord if you are a housing association tenant. You could also try your local councillor or even attend your member of parliament 's surgery to tell them of your harassment . A letter of support from your doctor would also help as you have rheumatoid arthritis this pressure does not help your condition. Good luck

  • Thank u so much for your help we have got hold of housing association. And as they own there house we can't do nothing about them citizen advice said not much they can do so stuck between rock and hard place feel trapped I will talk to doctor tough thanks

  • Loppy loo does mention they do not have a dropped kerb as with only one wage coming in they can't afford it. My neighbour had one put in last year & it cost £1,000!

    I find these days neighbours can be very "un neighbourly" & if you try to get some sort of resolution you are accused of causing trouble......luckily my immediate neighbours are lovely, but we do have one or two who are constantly stirring things upsetting those who can't stand up fir themselves.

    Nothing to do do with RA Medway lady....but LL has enough to put up with.....working as a carer with RA , caring for her partner & two children, I think she certainly deserves a hearing & personally my sympathy.

  • I'm pretty sure it's a difficult situation, but we are aware of only part of the problem and whilst I feel some sympathy it has to be said that doesn't help in a practical way. Does this drive have planning or building control permission as around here no dropped kerb = no vehicle access to a property over a pavement. Property issues are always difficult but the PCSO's can help in disputes with neighbours as can the landlord. So much in this post and it's hard to see what else can be said. I wish the lady well but as its an ongoing situation she really should try to seek some sort of resolution.

    None of us knows any others situation be that carer or cared for.

  • Yes we have all planing permitting and have brought the highway to get access to the drop kerb of which it clearly states we do not need to do it straight away but have three years to get drop kerb in from May this year I can clearly see by your comment that you would proberly be like the nieghbours in my street that condem the drive and us for trying to live and get in and out for appointment

  • Really ??? then you did not read my comments properly. I'm not surprised, as I did not judge you merely tried to help. Good luck and the whole world is not against you. In your photograph, unless we're looking at the houses opposite your drive is not blocked just people parking opposite which they are entitled to do. I'm at a loss and my final comment is as I said before I wish you well.

  • Have to agree. I can only see advice and support in Medway-lady's reply. Everyone's just trying to support each other through this horrible disease. Your situation with your neighbours sounds very stressful. Hope you find a resolution soon.

  • Yes..... you only have to watch that TV programme Neighbour's from Hell to know there are some really nasty, unkind people about.

    They probably need some sort of treatment as the things they do are not normal,or acceptable, but they fall between all the social/health/police facilities - so those being persecuted end up the losers & having to fend for themselves.

    Where I live a lot of people without a garage are having their front gardens paved over to park their cars, as the road gets used by all & sundry to avoid car park charges. They even park on on the road when they see a car parked in a front garden Luckily our local PCSO speaks to these drivers & 99% give her a hard time...whingeing there is nowhere else to park!

    To have a dropped kerb here the council send out a surveyor, both before & after the work, & as I said it is expensive.....& you have to use a council approved you can't do it cheaper yourself.

    I do wonder why some people are so horrible they want to annoy others who are living quietly minding their own business?

  • We took the car off the road for the reason it got smashed and cost me £500 to fix not to metion the stress it caused my partner thank u so much age tone for sticking up for us on here xx

  • You have to pay for your own drop curb in the UK? That's crazy...or am I not understanding this post?

  • Yes we do its between 3000 pound to cheapest we had is 750 can't afford it on one wage xx

  • oh hun, I'm utterly shocked at learning you have to pay for the drob curb to your home. Gosh, this is the most absurd thing that I've learned about the UK.

  • You have my sympathy obviously have envious, nasty inconsiderate neighbours, & I know from the recent personal experience of one of my neighbours how difficult is to get these idiots to shape up & stop troubling you. They are sad little people.

    My neighbour found that the housing association who owned the house these people lived in just wanted a quiet life & although promising to take action did nothing, until she wrote to our MP. The neighbour causing trouble was issued with an anti social behaviour order,& (for now) has stopped Causing trouble.

    You deserve to live your life without these people making it hell!

  • Thank you for ur support The problem we have is that the person blocking us in is a brought house so untouchable in our eyes

  • Surely you have tow trucks in the UK? If I was you, then I'd call one and have it towed at the owners expense. Your country must have laws about parking?

  • Yes but we have none till we have or kerb in and as they blocking there own drive there is nothing anyone can do xx

  • I'm speechless.....You mean to tell me that these people can block their own driveway? How absurd. I'm just so stunned at learning this.

    It's a hefty fine & a big tow truck bill where I live, even if I were to block my own driveway. I'm just gobsmacked at learning this.... My neighbour got fined from the city for parking on the street too close to his driveway...and we live in a cul de sac! I just can't fathom your city's parking laws.

    I wish you and your family the best.

  • were do you live I want to move there better then being traped

  • I'm quite a distance away from you :) I live in the city of White Rock, BC Canada.

  • Have a good read of this loopyloo, see if you can employ any of it

  • Thank you so much in gonna print this out and use it thank you xx

  • OMG. This takes me back to when I lived in an ex council flat in London. I lived there for 10 years, happy as Larry... everyone was so kind, a really nice community and then this family from hell moved in. Dangerous dogs, screaming children, drugs, anti social behaviour, just a scary family.

    I went round to the house about two weeks after they had moved in to ask politely if they could bring their dogs inside because they were barking all the time, and from then on they made my life an absolute misery.

    Several neighbour's complained to the council about them but the nasty family threatened them and said they would make their lives hell. They were clever and knew their rights.

    Long story short. You have to keep a diary of everything that is happening. You take photos and every time anything happens you talk to the area manager of whatever local council you come under. Get the name of one person and their email address so you deal with the same person each time. And you persist in telling that person what is happening, what these people are doing to you. Be clear and concise but do not give up. What these people are doing is harassment. You could take them to court if you have enough evidence. Do not let these people ruin your life.

  • thank you for your positive feedback what happed to that nasty family did you get them out in end

  • The family were threatened with eviction 3 times. Each time, the day before the council were due, they tidied up the garden, locked the dogs in the house, dressed nicely, cleaned the house, and they were sweet and polite and butter wouldn't melt in their mouthes.

    But the council had so much evidence against them that they basically arranged surprise weekly visits instead. So the family had to behave. But the process was exhausting, I'm sorry to say, and they were one of the reasons I left that particular area of London and sold my flat. I move down to Somerset where people are kind and generous and neighbourly, and I finally feel safe and at home.

    It's staggering how one family can ruin so many lives.

  • This is a group of 4 houses but the one that belong to the council are getting the private tennants to do the blocking in . So we can't touch them x

  • Of course you can. Doesn't matter if they are private tenants. It's still harassment.

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