It feels like it's going pear shaped

Hi all,

Not been around too much except to read sadly. The old work life balance is not going to well!

I am 2 days short from being 3 months quit. The longest quit I have managed since I joined here was just over the three month mark. Guess I am feeling a little wobbly because of that and because things are just beginning to feel a liitle to hard to deal with all at once.

Today my dearest hubby went in for a very long awaited hip replacement op. He has had to fight for it as only being 47 considered way too young. Quality of life is not considered important for some but luckily found a surgeon who was more than happy to take on the job in hand!

As you can imagine it has been worrying and stressfull. That with my job which is always full on has become a thousand time worse at present. So much pressure and unreasonable demands on human beings!

My health is not good either. Have been told I have an inflamed gall bladder and fat round my liver. Damn and blast. I have been 2 stone overweight the last 4 years or so but not found the strength to shift it. Now it seems I pay the price. Munching on cakes and chocolate since I quit has shot my Cholesterol level to 6.3 it seems :eek:

Anyway, to sum it up. Work is so stressful. Worried about OH. Worried about my new found health problems.

Arrived at hospital this morning expecting to wait with hubby till he went for op to be kicked out :rolleyes: Very upset, worried and for the first time in 3 months seriuosly considered blagging a fag off someone. My damned mobile would not work so went oustide A&E to be confronted by smokers who are not supposed to be smoking on hospital grounds lol. I was really considering asking for one then smelt the smoke -so not nice. Then I heard one chap coughing his guts up and thought ok, maybe I will push through this & I did.

I am glad I did. Another notch under my belt so to speak. Too frightened to eat anything other than ultra healthy now. Did succumb to my first bottle of wine in a year though :rolleyes:

Sorry this has turned into a mammoth post but just needed to offload.

Gaynor x

6 Replies

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  • hey gaynor

    you pushed through and thats all that matters well done am proud of you i am glad the man was coughing his guts up and made you change your mind its all making you stronger

    i have struggled with my weight the last few years with having my last two babies 2 years apart then quitting smoking all took its toll on me but at work about 6 months ish ago a male thoughtless collegue said when is this baby due from that moment on i have been on a mission to lose weight and have lost nearly 2 stone now [and i still give him the evil eye wen i see him]

    nothing is instant and all your health issues can be worked on when you feel strong enough smoking will only add to your health issues

    i hope your husband is better and up and about soon

    boo

  • Well done for not smoking during this stress trigger at the hospital, just keep remembering all your reasons for quitting and the many times you've had to start over, stick with this quit, you don't want to start over again. Address the weight if you don't find it stressful, if you do then put it on hold for now... or make little changes in the diet... sometimes small changes give big results. I have a friend who quit drinking, she lost 20 pounds in a few months just doing that alone.... don't force yourself to eat healthy only if you find it difficult as you won't keep it up. Make small changes that you can stick with. Anyway, hope things slow down for you soon x

  • Oh Gaynor, it's just horrible when life throws all kinds of crap at you all at once

    :( I know the temptation to light up is huge at times like this. Been there, got one or two t-shirts in the wardrobe. :)

    I know you'll probably hear this a lot, but at times like this you have to keep telling yourself: a cigarette really, really won't help with any of your problems right now. It will just make things worse.

    At least if you struggle through (as you have been doing, and good on you!) then that will give you something to be proud and happy about.

    Hope all goes well with your OH, and that your health issues are sorted out soon. Keep on going, you've come too far to drop this quit!

    Helen x

  • Hi my Friend

    Well done getting to three months, it can feel a bit difficult at that time (remember the terrible 3's), I think too our family and friends at home stop mentioning we have stopped so it's to the forum you go and they will support you every day no matter what.

    You are coping with a lot of stuff right now, hubby, work and some health issues but you made the 100% right choice at the hospital, you didn't smoke.

    I agree with Bella, take it easy, I know the other health problems will need to be dealt with but one at a time will be enough, as you achieve the no smoking you will take so much pride in yourself that you will find that you don't want to eat cake and 'not so good for the body' foods, then the other problems can be addressed.

    Best wishes to Hubby hope he is home and well.

    Take care, keep going, you are doing great.

    Jackie xx

  • Smoking on hospital grounds?!! And at the door I presume. There is nothing worse (and to think I was part of that group). Well done on surviving the test.

    I have come to see every situation like the one you have described as a test, and I give myself marks out of ten for how I deal with it. If I don't take any notice, it would be 10/10. If I think about giving in, 5/10 and If I cave, then i get zero marks (Haven't had any zeros yet, but a few 2's and 3's). I also ask myself how I could prepare better for the next time. There have been a few simple things like altering a path to avoid the group of smokers who hang out at the back door at work by walking out the front door and around the building to my car. This avoids the temptation and gets exercise, a double bonus:D.

    Once more you deserve a cheer for making it through another stressful day, Hip Hip.............ok, way to leave me hanging guys:o.

  • Thank you so much everbody for your replies and support.

    I have had no wobbles today despite everything that is going on.

    Our hospital has a no smoking on the hospital grounds rule now but there is a group of smokers outside every entrance. I have to hold my breath walking down the corridors to the outside world as it is all wafting in. I can only breathe when I have got well past the afore mentioned group!

    OH not too good atm but still early days. Not helped by the fact that the chap opposite who was in a great deal of pain last night was sat in his chair by the bed today happily eating his dinner then walking around. OH has a pre existing condition so more complicated. He will get there though I know.

    Today was my 12 week marker, yay.

    Well, didn't get in till late after visiting, ate some long needed food, made update phone calls and must now fall into bed. Up again @5,30 for work :rolleyes:

    Just wanted to say a quick thank you to you all :D

    Gaynor x

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