The journey of Stav...

[nsd_user663_7318]

Well I posted yesterday that I had an idea for a new submission which some people may actually find of use; that is in place of my usual ramblings and sharing the complete b@*&%$£s that passes through my head at amy particular moment. SO...I thought I'd share in one place the wheres and whys. Sorry for where information has been duplicated but the post wouldn't be complete without it.

Reason:

[*]The loss of my dad at the age of 58 (that's how old he was, not me) from a heart attack caused directly by smoking heavily for most of his life (40ish a day)

[*]Finding my dad after he'd had his heart attack and not being able to do anything to help (save) him

[*]My own health reasons

Now I've noted 'reason' above but I think it's worth stressing that my quit wasn't planned. Thinking about quitting put the fear of God in me; I'd put packets in the bin thinking "that's it" then buy new ones the very next day. I was pretty rubbish really! However, it just so happened that I smoked on the 31st December but didn't on the 1st January.

Day 1: Was pretty easy to be honest, I didn't really suffer any withdrawal at this stage.

Days 2 - 3: I felt a little rubbish; anxious. However, looking at this in context I suffer from panic and anxiety. I put my feet up and listened to the Allen Carr E-Book.

3 - 7 Days: Returning to work! Wasn't such as bigger deal as I thought it may have been. Confidence starts to get high! Over the period of this week I started to feel the true benefits of not smoking. Breathing was easier, I felt better but was eating like a horse! Sleep also a bit of a problem.

7 - 14 Days: No real cravings but I did have "wants", sort of like wanting Mars bar. It wasn't a feeling that made be rip my nails from my finger tips, just a gentle reminder that something wasn't there any more.

14 - 31 Days: Sleeping was still a bit of an issue (although not as bad as it had been). Eating...everything. Wants "yes". Blips 1 .. AARGGG.

Essentially just inside my first month I'd had a particularly bad day. Unlike most, I charged to the shops and bought some fags. I knew I didn't want them, had to have them though. I wasn't going to smoke...but I did...well sort of! This experience started and stopped with me lighting up. Thankfully I didn't smoke it, I did light it though. Strangely enough this was just what I needed. The experience nearly made throw up, the smell was terrible. I actually threw the T-Shirt I was wearing in the bin as I didn't feel that washing it would do any good. In hindsight (although I wouldn't recommend this as an approach), it was part of my quit. It didn't make me stray, I didn't fail. I've not wanted since. Putting thoughts of disappointment aside it didn't make me feel better; just much much worse. Exactly what I needed to put me off (hopefully forever).

31 until now (circa day 50), I've been enjoying every single moment of my quit. I no longer count the days as that implies (to myself) that I'm actually doing something. I'm not. I'm just an ordinary non-smoker. I'm having my own private little party inside but I don't think it's anything to be congratulating myself on directly. On the other hand I feel bad that I'd smoked in the first place; killing myself.

So then! For me the quit has had its ups and downs but hasn't in itself been traumatic. Once you can get your head around being an addict and therefore a large percentage is withdrawal then you're well on your way. Secondly don't worry if you get strange things happening to you; smoking kills you, quitting doesn't. If you're concerned head to your GP or at least give them a shout. Many of the symptoms I put down to my quit weren't. My GP put me right over the phone and put everything in perspective.

I mention the above because nearly no two quits are the same. Expect to be impacted both mentally and physically though.

What more can I say?

eermm...

ENJOY IT! Your quit will be a challenge (at varying levels), it is an achievement (I just don't look at mine that way). When in doubt sniff your smokers hand and just take a deep breath!

Fresh air, free lungs and the freedom of not being tied to nicotine is a wonderful experience. Those of you who haven't tried it yet should! Go on...You'll love it!

Nuff Said.

Me

[nsd_user663_7469]

If giving up was easy the world would be smoke free

Hi Stav I have read your thread and cannot at the moment think what to reply, I am not saying that in a negative way just I can associate with a lot you said but need time to format it in my head.

I am glad you are in a good place now and that your head is now on your side LOL

Will come back later and see if there is anything I can add Take Care and be good and dont do the lighting up thing again as its a waste of T Shirts LOL x

[nsd_user663_3728]

Hi Stav

That's a great post and it will I know help many along the road

Love

Marg xx

[nsd_user663_7318]

Cheers Marg, hopefully somebody will find it useful!

Happy Friday.

[nsd_user663_5048]

bluddy hell mate you could just simply publish this and sell it in waterstones and whsmiths, when i read it i thought

the novel all about stav...and i was right

i wont bother doing one about me because ill be here until 2011 writing about the 1st 2 months of 2009

i am sorry myself to hear about your dad:(one of my great nan's had one of them oxygen machines in her room and was in bed all the time and went when i was 6 or 7 i believe due to smoking as well

Geoff

[nsd_user663_8221]

Cheers Marg, hopefully somebody will find it useful!

Happy Friday.

YES- I find it incredibly useful- thank you, you've reinforced a lot of my thinking- that the bad stuff was there anyway, that maybe, it's just not such a huge deal as I thought it was going to be. Time line wise I'm not nearly as far through the journey as you in terms of the ups and downs- but they are just that, just as life was before really.

You are so right that it's about getting your head round being an addict, once that is mastered the work is done really- I'm no master of my junkie self quite yet- but it's all quite straightforward really, I decided not to smoke anymore- end of. I hope to let go of the counting as you have (though for now I am counting- and proud and a touch self conglaturatory), how many days is irrelevant, what matters is being a non smoker- that's just who I am now. Oh, and also I was just putting things down to the quit, til I read your post this am, those things now dealt with, so thanks

Pols xxx

[nsd_user663_22002]

Giving this a bump as i found that really useful. I always think the more detailed a post the more they help me. ..

Obviously i'm happy to sympathise if people need to vent with "having a bad day" posts - but always find the more they write the easier it is to find something to help. Ditto positive posts - if you write WHY you feel good, HOW you managed to stay positive it can really help potential non-smokers become actual non-smokers

[CamperPete]

Thanks for bumping Lu else i'd never known it existed, a very good post indeed.

[nsd_user663_7318]

Blimey I'd forgotten all about this....hopefully times will be that good again!