The way we change - story of my weight loss

As a teenager and during university, I wasn’t very successful with boys. I understand I wasn’t the most attractive girl in the school, and I have always been told that people should appreciate you because of the way you are and not the way you look. This is very easy to say but it doesn’t make you feel better. I was at the pub with friends last night and they were talking about a girl, who was on a date, and she was left alone only because the boy saw a much more attractive lady. I felt sorry for her as the same used to happen to me all the times. Boys came and talked to me only because they were interested in my much prettier female friends.

When I was a teenage, this was hard to accept as I wasn’t mature enough to understand that these people didn’t deserve my attention. But, eventually, I got to the point where I truly realised that what you had been told forever was true: if they didn’t appreciate the way I was, they weren’t good for me.

It took 27 years and losing 13 kilos to get to this point, but I am here now and, as I said in my first article, I will never go back. Never go back to negative choices and this includes people too. I am much more selective in giving my attentions to people, in CHOOSING friends and sharing my life with others now.

My friend Georgia gave me a very good piece of advice: our life is like our backyard; we are the only one to DECIDE who we want in and who we want out. This is something I will always keep in my mind as I haven’t been stressing out if people like me, if they don’t, if they want to talk to me, if they don’t, if they want to invite me to their parties or they don’t, if they are nice to me or they aren’t. I don’t give a shit anymore.

During this weight loss journey, I changed my figure first. It took a bit longer to change my mind-set but I finally realise that if people don’t like me the way I am, happy and sad at the same moment, serious and crazy at the same moment, chatty and silent at the same moment, stressful and chilled out at the same moment, they don’t like me at all. Much more importantly, they don’t even deserve to be given my attentions in the first place if they look at my body before looking at me, and I am sure this means something a bit more different now!

Ciao

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3 Replies

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  • It took me almost 60 years to come to the same conclusion, teresina, so well done you for wising up sooner :)

  • That is certainly food for thought.

    I think we can all think of times when we have felt like 'just the fat girl' .

    We are worth as much, is not more, than all the stick insects out there.

    Well done on achieving your goals

    Debs

  • That's just it exactly!

    We took the Brownies to the park the other week and we walk past a basketball court that's usually full of teenagers hanging out when the weather's nice. One of my 8-year old Brownies came up to me and told me that they had called the girls losers. I told my Brownie not to listen to them, that the teenagers were just afraid they themselves were losers and that everyone else would find out so they were mean to us to disguise it! :P

    But really, I think that's true of many things/people in life. You have to love yourself first before you start to realize that you are worthy of being loved. As it were. I agree with you Teresina, no point spending time with those who aren't worth the time! :)

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