I was just reading Flossie's wonderful Don't Look Back In Anger post (hats off to you, Flossie, what an inspiration you are!) and something she wrote really resonated, about eating when one doesn't feel too great. I have lived with fairly extreme anxiety since I was 4 years old (52 years, grrr!) and I know that the main reason I am overweight is that when I went to boarding school food became my go-to (non-) solution to feeling frightened and comfortless... and I haven't really looked back (in Anger or anything else) since. Now, not eating is an effort on two fronts - one, because I love delicacies as much as anyone else and have about 1 milligram of self control to every 100 kilos of greed, and two, because filling my mouth and stomach gives me a misplaced sense of security. I find it almost intolerable to stop eating before I'm seriously full, and tend to gravitate towards sweet and creamy things, so the effect on my weight is catastrophic! Not to say my gall bladder, which had to be whipped out and was found to be bursting with gravel which had caused me so much pain that twice I thought I was having a heart attack. Now it's just the op scar that hurts as I get larger and larger... I have been feeling much calmer lately, so had high hopes for resistance, but last night my housemate suggested that I should write the book that I've been contemplating on and off for ages, and both my anxiety and my desire to stuff myself with multiple cream teas shot off the scale. All I've done so far is stuff myself with nectarines, but... does anyone else have this sort of reaction, and please, how do you handle it?
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