Why can't I get 'on the wagon'?

So it's been 2 years now since basically I got fat!! I've ish tried diets in that time but can't get my head in it, been going to the gym too but not enjoying it, really need to find some motivation, any ideas welcome??? Also my GP is all most certain I have poly cystic ovaries which doesn't help as when I do diet, most I've ever lost in a week is 1.5 lb and others do around 4/5 very down hearten please help

9 Replies

  • You have to be 100% committed to really lose the weight. I would suggest you need to write down all the reasons why you want to lose it. The temptation is to write negative things, for example: I hate my fat stomach! If that is the case, flip the comment around to read something like: I am looking forward to having a flat stomach.

    By creating positive thoughts, you are beginning to take control and setting goals. The next thing to do is to find yourself a proper eating plan that you like and feel control with. There are loads out there, but the fundamental principles remain the same: You have to have portion control, reduce the unhealthy foods and ditch the junk food.

    Set yourself a mini goal and a reward for hitting it. You say you get fed up with a 1lb a week, but in 2 months, that is half a stone plus! The best way to lose weight is steady Eddie because you have more chance of keeping it off!

    You didn't say how much you need to lose? If a few pounds, then it probably is a case of a bit of exercise and tightening muscles, in which case you need to find exercise you enjoy!

    If you have a lot to lose, you can have a crash start week to motivate you to keep going. Crash start is literally eating mini portions of salad and veg, no snacking other than fruit, not bananas, little or no carbs and only chicken or tuna or other healthy proteins. I am not condoning drastic dieting, but I do get the motivation side, plus if you are used to big portions, this adjusts your tastes and stomach capacity. You find you can't eat so much!

    Good luck, I hope this helps

  • Hi, I would like to add to LadyP's commend: keep it within the day, one day at the time I could stick to a food plan.

    I also found myfitnesspal.com very helpful, as I could see in 'black and white' how much I ate of what and how much more was recommended for the rest of the day. I am on my third week of the 12week plan, it is early days, but so far so good.

    Last not least sparkling mineral water has become a great friend and on quite a few occasions a subsitute for snacks.

    Gyms are not for me. But I got my bike out and try to take the dogs for longer walks.

  • My suggestion is to first of all forget the word 'diet' except to refer to what you are eating ie a 'healthy diet'. Then consider looking at all the information around the following link. nhs.uk/livewell/loseweight/...

    It is a weight loss plan designed to get you to change your habits for life, not just when trying to lose weight. This plan recommends that you only lose 1.5-2.0lb a week anyway as that way it is more likely to be sustainable. probably best to realise that you put on the weight over a period of time so it will take time to lose it.

    Regarding actually following the 12 week plan my tips are to plan, plan & plan. So know what your meals are for the week, plan in snacks so you don't get to hungry, always have something healthy with you. Weigh portions until you get used to it and use smaller plates. Don't deny yourself your favourite foods but have smaller quantities. If you don't like going to the gym, what about other exercise eg walking, swimming or c25k?

    As for motivation, for me it was feeling a lot healthier and totally changing shape (do go to the gym for weights exercise and do Jog Scotland & did c25k). The big boost is when people start to notice and you get positive comments and when clothes get loose. I saw someone yesterday I hadn't seen for a while and they couldn't believe the difference.

    Only you can make the decision but there is help & support on this site, especially around the Monday weigh in pages. Good luck & post how you get on.

  • Hello,

    What has helped me is to buy a 2 in 1 crosstrainer/bike, I have that in front of the tv so before I go to bed I put a DVD on and get on the bike, it's sitting down so it's easy to do, I do 20 minutes a night. I also have PCOS and find the diet isn't enough, I have to exercise. I've tried various diets and they never work, I lose a lot of weight (usually around 3 stone) then pile even more back on and I find that when I start losing it through exercising the thought of throwing away all that effort just so I can eat crap makes me rethink the chocolate or the 3rd yorkshire pudding.

    I also record everything on my fitness pal, I put the app on my phone so there's no excuse for not filling in my diary. Once you can see what you're eating it's much easier to control. Also, if you really must have that bar of chocolate the 20 minutes on the bike works off those calories so you can balance it out.

    Also, maybe try finding more people with PCOS so you think about weight loss with them and don't get so disheartened by people losing more than you. PCOS does make it harder but not impossible. I'm currently nearing a 2 stone weightloss, still a long way to go but PCOS won't stop me.

  • Hi sarahjn27,

    Actually, the first thing I'm going to say, at risk of being controversial, is that I really didn't particularly care how well or otherwise other slimmers were doing. My efforts were focussed on my excess weight.

    Every person's weight loss journey is individual for a myriad of reasons. I'd suggest you kind of 'personalise' your weight loss efforts more. By that I mean set yourself your target, and your mini-targets (milestones) and you lose your extra weight for your reasons.

    If other's are doing well, then jolly nice for them, but really so what?

    Also, do try to keep a positive spin on it. Yeah, be a tad smug when you lose a bit of weight and give yourself a pat on the shoulder, when it goes right, or when you twig where you've been going wrong.

    And, as always, those with underlying medical conditions should talk with their GPs about how the condition or any treatment regime might impact upon their weight loss efforts (and vice versa).

    And as for the word "diet" as a weight loss process - I rarely use it in that context. Focus on a weight loss programme, or on nutrition, or on words that don't have such trashy unhelpful connotations as I personally think the word "diet" has. (For me, it always brings to mind those rubbish "you can lose 100 kg in three seconds flat" type of adverts).

    Good luck with your weight loss journey.

  • Motivation to lose weight has to come from within, I don't think there is anything anyone else can do to make you motivated. Having said that, part of the problem might be you are being to hard on yourself. 4-5lb per week is not a realistic goal. 1lb a week is a good healthy rate of weight loss, 1.5lb a week is great and faster than I have managed on average :)

    To be better motivated to exercise, try to find things you actually enjoy. If you hate going to the gym then try something else - swimming, going for a walk, gardening, bike rides, playing tennis, yoga,... Hopefully you'll be able to find something you like and so it is not a chore to exercise.

    The same thing applies to diet to some extent, eat things you like rather than only "diet foods". For example, if you really love chocolate then don't try to give it up completely. Just swap a large bar for a couple of squares, or a bar every day for a bar once a week as an indulgence. I have found I can eat the types of foods I like and still be a healthy weight, I just need to show some moderation in how much and how often I have higher calorie options. Recipes can often be adapted to make them healthier without losing the flavour, like using lower fat mince and adding more veg when making a chilli.

    It is really much easier to stick to a healthy lifestyle if you find out what works for you and don't worry too much about what other people are doing! For example, I don't generally have snacks and prefer to have larger meals but other people prefer planning snacks into their day. Some people follow 5:2 diet but I just count calories.

    If you have a lot to lose (like I did at the start) it is helpful to break it down into mini targets. My first target was just to get out of the obese BMI range. I needed to lose 2 stone just to manage that, so getting to "healthy" BMI seemed impossible. Once I managed to hit the overweight weight range I celebrated by buying myself a non-food treat (new iPad) and then kept on going to eventually hit a healthy weight later that year.

  • It's been said already but.... you have to be honest with yourself....

    firstly - why do you want to lose weight? You have to want to do it for you, not because someone says you should.

    If you are doing this for you then you have to commit to doing it. It can't be half hearted. The only real way to lose weight is to eat less and move more.

    Use 'my fitness pal' to track your calories; eat your usual food for a week and record every single mouthful you eat and drink and be brutally honest; the result will probably shock you.

    Then....try eating from a smaller plate so your portions are smaller. Cut out junk food, sugary drinks, sweets and cakes. Allow yourself one SMALL treat per day ... 1 small glass of wine or a small bar of chocolate. If you deny yourself everything you will not be able to sustain it. And keep recording EVERYTHING you eat and drink.

    If you don't like gyms (and I don't) - then get out and walk. 30 mins 3 times a week can make a huge difference and you can extend the time you walk as you get used to it. Walk with a friend if you can or walk a friend or neighbour's dog if you can find one - it makes walking more pleasant.

    Most people's average weight loss is 1 - 2 lbs per week - a sustainable amount and 1 lb a week is nearly 4 stones in a year.

    There is no easy way to weight loss - it takes hard work and commitment and the only person who can motivate you is you.

    Sorry to sound so blunt but I'm telling you like it is. There is no point in telling you it's easy. I've have followed my own advice for the last year and have lost over 4 stone. It's been hard work but it has definitely been worth it.


  • I would think your perception of a diet is something that requires sacrifice for very little reward.

    Just make one change at a time, and make it fun so that you want to keep with it.

    Since PCOS is associated with insulin-resistance, I would suggest you reduce your consumption of high-glycaemic foods (including jacket potato, wholemeal bread, Weetabix, Shredded Wheat and rice) and fructose, eating more vegetables and natural protein with the accompanying fat instead.

  • Hi sarahjn27. I feel pretty much the same and am asking the same question! My hubby keeps reassuring me I CAN do it, I just have to tell me head that! Hope it helps, we will get there!

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